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The direction you choose to face determines whether you’re standing at the end or the beginning
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The direction you choose to face determines whether youâre standing at the end or the beginning of a [Coach Tony]( Coach Tony [@tonystubblebine]( The direction you choose to face determines whether youâre standing at the end or the beginning of a road. ~ Richelle E. Goodrich Iâve talked to a lot of people who are feeling isolated. A lot of plans in January were canceled, so maybe you didnât get the social contact that you need to feel healthy. If thatâs you, Iâm mentioning this so that you know other people are going through this right now, too. Thereâs a certain grit required to pivot to a Plan B. Maybe you wanted to see someone in person, and it fell through. Now, do you have the grit to adjust and fall back to a second plan that maybe doesnât feel as good? That plan is almost certainly better than doing nothing, even if itâs inconvenient. âBorrowing Selfâ is a relative of social comparison.
Iâve used this newsletter to suggest making âreduced social comparisonâ one of your 2022 goals. I still think this is a worthy goal, but this phrase âborrowing selfâ hit me so hard. They feel related in that they are both about getting externally what would be more rewarding to get internally.
There is nothing inherently wrong about what is called âborrowing selfâ from others. But when engaging others becomes our automatic way of calming down, finding motivation, or solving a problem, we set ourselves up for trouble. We experience steep drops in mood and functioning on a day where no one is willing to lend us any approval, attention, or assistance.
From [Are You âBuilding Up Selfâ or âBorrowing Selfâ?]( by [Kathleen Smith]( _ A lesson from 20 years of running sub-four-minute miles.
I read a couple of things into this quote from Nick Willis about how heâs been able to maintain a 20-year streak of breaking four minutes in the mile:
So what Iâve changed is that I have to be much more intentional in my training. I think intentionality is the key for a lot of older runnersâââmaking sure that you donât become too far removed from the higher intensity stuff: The hill sprints. The weight room. The track strides in spikes. If you go four or five months without doing any of that stuff it becomes harder and harder to return to it. When you are young, youâre playing pickup football on the beach with your friends and you are generally just exposing your body to some of those movements where agility is required. [[Outside Online](]
The first is just consistency. Iâve heard Tom Brady say something similar, that the trick to being in shape when you are older is to never let yourself get out of shape. (Itâs not that you canât get back into shape, itâs just that doing so takes a ton of time.)
The second is an example of how aging isnât literally about getting older, itâs also about how your lifestyle changes. For example, you had recess in school and you donât have that at work. We canât change the passage of time, but we can change our lifestyle. I file this away as a lesson thatâs important for healthspan and lifespan. How do you feel about Cal Newport?
I have [his episode on the Tim Ferriss podcast]( queued up for today. Iâve read a lot of his stuff all the way back to when he was just focused on productivity hacks for getting good grades. But heâs gone a lot deeper since then. Have any of you tried to apply his advice? What went well? What didnât? __ If you like this newsletter, would you share it with a friend? There's a lot of why behind that. Selfishly for me, I like to reach people. That's part of my life goal to have an impact. But also, for you, this newsletter gets better with more readers. You may notice that I'm often soliciting feedback and then incorporating that feedback into the newsletter.
That's actually the secret sauce here. I'm very much a believer that the most useful knowledge is applied knowledge. So I'm never satisfied just to read new research. I also want to hear what happened when readers, coaches and clients tried to apply that knowledge. Growing this newsletter is one way I make that feedback loop stronger. Donât miss out on the other issues by Coach Tony [Become a member for $5 per month]( Did you enjoy this issue? [Yes]( [No]( [Coach Tony](
Coach Tony [@tonystubblebine]( Tips, inspirations, and knowledge on productivity, happiness, health, and making an impact on our world. Official email of the Better Humans publication on Medium. (@bttrhumans) You can manage your subscription [here](. In order to unsubscribe, click [here](. If you were forwarded this newsletter and you like it, you can subscribe [here](. Created with [Revue by Twitter](.
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