You miss 100 percent of the frothy coffees you don’t make

Frothyfrothyfrothyfrothycoffee  ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ [View this email in your browser]( | [Manage newsletter preferences](newsletter=bna) [bon appetit](  ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ Signs and symbols This week my partner shook a cocktail so vigorously the lid of the shaker froze onto the base and we couldn’t get it off. It felt like a metaphor for the week. Nothing will be easy for you! The stuck-on shaker cackled. We smacked it against the sink ‘til it opened. The next day, our car was packed and we drove 14 hours to Michigan to self-quarantine for two weeks before we stay with family enduring an entirely different health catastrophe: relentless cancer. (The oncologist approved this plan.) It’s snowy here, and the only vegetable in the fridge is a head of cabbage. I brought pasta, tomato paste, shallots, and heavy cream so we can make our favorite comfort food, Jon & Vinny’s vodka sauce, on repeat. Get the recipe: [Fusilli alla Vodka with Basil and Parmesan]( Wide eyes What kept me awake that entire drive? Two rounds of dalgona coffee, pre-frothed. Weeeeeee!!! Read more: [I Gave In And Tried the Frothy Coffee Thing]( The closest we’ll get to going back to the office Thanks to the redditor who made this [Test Kitchen virtual background]( for Zoom! Complete with Sohla El-Waylly at Station 2 in case you need culinary support. 6 things I observed in the Test Kitchen’s [pantry pasta video](. - Andy: casually has a Meyer lemon - Brad: has a [Le Creuset in petit fruits](, my favorite pattern too - Claire: what are those rustic red pepper flakes? ([They’re Tutto, of course](.) - Sohla: has the best induction burner out there, [the Breville Control Freak](, because her electric stove doesn’t get hot enough to sear. - Chris: ’s kids have enough combined teeth to be extras on Tiger King - Amiel: has a Dutch oven salvaged from the trenches of World War I Not [all substitutions]( Google doesn’t have all the answers. When it comes to food substitutions, I go to [The Food Substitutions Bible](, [an encyclopedia of exactly what it sounds like](. But in the way the dictionary leads you from one word to four, a recent journey led me to substituting mayo in place of buttermilk in banana bread. It was only ⅓ of a cup, no big deal, right? And Chris Morocco’s beloved [mayo chocolate cake]( uses it! Well, my banana bread came out bouncy and sticky, like those rubber hands you fling against the wall until they get so covered with carpet fuzz you lose interest. Better luck next time. So much for the pouches Earlier this year I wrote about [the rise in snack foods that seemed marketed at survivalists](, who turn out to be desk-glued, overworked office mice. Pouches of energy-boosting chia, dehydrated cheese cubes for grounded astronauts, and an ever-loosening definition of jerky. Looking back at the story now, my timing was...prescient. But now that we’re living it, this plotline torn from a sci-fi novel I’d pass up on the library shelf, no one is thrilled to share their meal of room temp oatmeal in a pouch. People seem to be cooking real food (frozen pizza counts). So that’s a relief. Easter happened “Happy Easter,” I said, sliding three cups of [Royal instant pistachio pudding](—nuclear mint green, specked with almonds doing their best impersonation of pricey pistachios—to my family. It tasted like melted spumoni ice cream and by that I mean: it was delicious. This is pudding propaganda and nothing more. [For some sad reason we only have 11 pudding recipes???]( Unnecessary TikTok of the week Other than this masterpiece that features [Hooters hoverboard curbside pickup](, I came across MANY Bon Appétit TikToks this week and it’s hard to pick my favorite. It’s a tossup between [this one]( and [this one](. Unnecessary meme of the week Unnecessary food feud of the week “I have a question,” Emily Schultz posed to our staff Slack room. “I’ve been seeing so many people roast a chicken upside down…but like who said the breast up way is right?! What’s the difference?” It seemed like a fitting method for upside-down times. “Guys, I have done it upside down many times,” replied Julia Kramer. “And a turkey, too.” “On purpose??” asked Molly Baz. “It really depends on how the heat in your oven circulates,” said Julia, who likes this method because she doesn’t care about the breast. “Really you’re prioritizing the thighs,” she said. Molly was convinced: “The legs are the best part so why not optimize their Crispiness?” “Exactly,” said Julia. “And then the breast is maybe more steamed,” Molly continued, “which isn’t the worst, and perfect for chix salad. Wow I am shook to my core.” “I just worry about flabby skin once you turn it back over,” said Carla Lalli Music, who only roasts in one direction (so far), “but maybe we have to invent a new way to carve a chicken ‘from behind’ and really next-level this whole thing.” “It doesn’t seem like a bad idea,” was Schultz’s conclusion, “and people should stop being so RIGID about how things are done in the kitch. I wish I had a spare chicken to roast.” Same, same, same. Have an upside-down weekend, Alex Beggs Senior staff writer Follow Us [Facebook]( [Twitter]( [Instagram]( [Pinterest]( This e-mail was sent to you by Bon Appétit. To ensure delivery to your inbox (not bulk or junk folders), please add our e-mail address, bonappetit@newsletters.bonappetit.com, to your address book. View our [Privacy Policy]( [Unsubscribe]( | [Manage Newsletter Preferences](newsletter=bna) Copyright © Condé Nast 2020. One World Trade Center, New York, NY 10007. All rights reserved.