We are here for Barbie’s existential angst

Also: The club I never wanted to join [Donate ❤️]( [View in Browser](  July 30, 2023 Dear Cog reader, I’ve been reading a lot about Greta Gerwig lately. I first encountered her in the film “Frances Ha,” which she starred in and co-wrote. Then there was “Lady Bird,” her solo directorial debut (which won a slew of awards), and then her extraordinary adaption of Louisa May Alcott’s “Little Women” – the book she credits with inspiring her to become a writer and director. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know Gerwig’s latest film is the “Barbie” movie. The movie is breaking all sorts of box office records. In a week’s time, it has already grossed more than [half a billion dollars](. According to [Variety]( it’s the “biggest debut ever for a film directed by a woman.” With “Barbie,” Gerwig has created a cultural moment – and Cog is here for it. We decided to publish two essays about the film this week. The first is by author and regular contributor Alysia Abbott. Her piece takes on the conservative critiques of the film (there have been many: see [Ben Shapiro]( and [Piers Morgan]( and explains why those pundits have it all wrong. She also shares the story of seeing the film with her soon-to-be 18-year-old daughter. The sub-text of [mothers and daughters]( “Barbie” resonated deeply with Abbott, who lost her own mom when she was just 2 years old. “We all emotionally break up with our parents as we leave childhood,” she writes. “But we also break up with our younger selves, our innocent fantasy-believing selves.” The second piece is by my colleague and fellow editor, Sara Shukla. Sara first arrived to Cog as a contributor, and she’s back in that capacity this week, with an essay (for the radio and the website). Sara and her dear friend, Margaret, packed their husbands and kids into two cars and headed down the Cape to see “Barbie” at a drive-in theater in Wellfleet. “Walking back and forth from the concessions, I saw at least three pink party dresses and one set of impressively high pink heels,” she writes, setting the scene. The heart of Sara’s essay, though, is about the [inescapable "both/and" of life]( “We’re at a stage when life feels both deeply overwhelming and like all we’ve ever wanted at the same time,” she writes. “And while I’m an adult with a job and a robust collection of Birkenstocks, I still feel like a teenager sometimes, like I’m carrying around these multiple timelines of myself, thinking, ‘Isn’t this all supposed to make some sort of sense by now?’ ” She makes sense of this familiar swirl of middle age by staying tethered to old friends, like Margaret – somebody who knows all the different parts of her: “the good, the bad and the just plain weird.” How important it is to be known. In an interview in [The Atlantic]( Gerwig talks about how baffling she finds the concept of linear time: “And I think that in trying to pull it together and understand where you are and where you’ve been, there’s always an ache in it,” she told the interviewer. In Gerwig, the women of my generation have found a compatriot — someone who is interested in modern womanhood and motherhood, yet astounded that we are somehow this old already. That feels exactly right. Thank you for reading, Cloe Axelson Senior Editor, Cognoscenti [Follow]( Support the news   Must Reads [We all contain multitudes. Even Barbie]( There are toys that see us through stages of life, and there are people, writes Sara Shukla. Seeing "Barbie" with an old friend reminded her of all the different versions of herself, and how important it is to be seen and loved for all of them. [Read more.]( [We all contain multitudes. Even Barbie]( There are toys that see us through stages of life, and there are people, writes Sara Shukla. Seeing "Barbie" with an old friend reminded her of all the different versions of herself, and how important it is to be seen and loved for all of them. [Read more.]( ['Barbie' isn't about the matriarchy or the patriarchy. It’s about fantasy vs. reality]( Conservative critics are missing the point, writes Alysia Abbott. The emotional conflict in Barbie isn't between men and women. It's between the life we imagined for ourselves as kids and the life we actually live as adults. [Read more.]( ['Barbie' isn't about the matriarchy or the patriarchy. It’s about fantasy vs. reality]( Conservative critics are missing the point, writes Alysia Abbott. The emotional conflict in Barbie isn't between men and women. It's between the life we imagined for ourselves as kids and the life we actually live as adults. [Read more.]( [I loved Sinéad for her wild courage and rage]( Sinéad helped me understand myself at a time when it didn't feel safe to question my sexuality, writes Aimee Seiff Christian. [Read more.]( [I loved Sinéad for her wild courage and rage]( Sinéad helped me understand myself at a time when it didn't feel safe to question my sexuality, writes Aimee Seiff Christian. [Read more.]( [I’ve lugged my books through 9 moves. I can’t leave them behind]( The stories in Anne Gardner's books — from "The Little Prince" to "Common Ground" — aren't the only stories they hold. [Read more.]( [I’ve lugged my books through 9 moves. I can’t leave them behind]( The stories in Anne Gardner's books — from "The Little Prince" to "Common Ground" — aren't the only stories they hold. [Read more.]( [When my mother died, I became part of a club I never wanted to join]( In my imaginary life, my mom was the first person I called when I got engaged, writes Laura Shea Souza. I think about how much she would have loved seeing my daughters be out in the world. [Read more.]( [When my mother died, I became part of a club I never wanted to join]( In my imaginary life, my mom was the first person I called when I got engaged, writes Laura Shea Souza. I think about how much she would have loved seeing my daughters be out in the world. [Read more.]( What We're Reading "But there’s history, and there’s History, and it’s possible that the second is what we’re living through in this summer of temperatures never before recorded by humans." "[Heat Waves and the Sweep of History]( The New Yorker. "Many Americans, in much the same way we’ve grown accustomed to cheap products that arrive within 24 hours or less, have an unsavory tendency to feel as though we are owed a fabulous, friction-free time simply because we’ve spent enough money and energy planning to have a fabulous, friction-free time." "[Stop trying to have the perfect vacation. You’re ruining everyone else’s.]( Vox. "Any method of distinguishing among such applicants is inherently subjective, and any of the traits, acquired skills, or backgrounds that help push students over the edge could be considered 'unearned advantage.' But none of those carries the stigma that race-based affirmative action does." "[No One Deserves to Go to Harvard]( The Atlantic. "I wanted — and still want — my reality to be perfect, free of conflict and cellulite and irrepressible thoughts of death. I lost my Barbie. I don’t want to lose my daughter." — Alysia Abbott, "['Barbie' isn't about the matriarchy or the patriarchy. It’s about fantasy vs. reality]( ICYMI [These women know what they want. LFG]( The U.S. women's national soccer team may be the closest thing we have to a sports dynasty. To me, they are magic, writes Cloe Axelson. [Read more.]( [These women know what they want. LFG]( The U.S. women's national soccer team may be the closest thing we have to a sports dynasty. To me, they are magic, writes Cloe Axelson. [Read more.]( If you’d like to write for Cognoscenti, send your submission, pasted into your email and not as an attachment, to opinion@wbur.org. Please tell us in one line what the piece is about, and please tell us in one line who you are. 😎 Forward to a friend. They can sign up [here](. 📣 Give us your feedback: newsletters@wbur.org 📧 Get more WBUR stories sent to your inbox. [Check out all of our newsletter offerings.]( Support the news     Want to change how you receive these emails? Stop getting this newsletter by [updating your preferences.](  I don't want to hear from WBUR anymore. Unsubscribe from all WBUR editorial newsletters [here.](  Interested in learning more about corporate sponsorship? [Click here.]( Copyright © 2023 WBUR-FM, All rights reserved.