Weekend: Chew like you have a secret

— Check out what we Skimm’d for you today August 19, 2023 [Subscribe]( [Read in browser]( [theSkimm Logo] Daily Skimm WEEKEND “Always the ones that terrify children” — Harrison Ford’s reaction to [a snake species]( being named after him. Why did it have to be snakes? theSkimm With Dating App Sociologist (Yes, It’s a Thing) Jess Carbino There’s no shortage of dating horror stories. Remember the [Tinder Swindler]( or [West Elm Caleb](? No wonder then, as [about a third]( of Americans use dating sites and apps, more and more women are joining private Facebook groups — including Are We Dating the Same Guy? and Vouched Dating — to vet potential partners. To learn more, we spoke with [Jess Carbino](, PhD, former in-house sociologist for Tinder and Bumble… Q: These online groups can have tens of thousands of members. Why are so many women turning to communities of strangers for intel on dates? Women often feel like they don’t have a strong [option] for verifying the identities of the people with whom they’re interacting. And if they’ve had a negative dating experience in the past ... they may feel [it’s even more important] to walk into a date or relationship prepared. These types of groups can provide them with that context … However, there could also be a more sinister side of these groups — which is that [it provides a platform for] people who’ve had an adverse experience and want to air it to the public. Some people may do it because they feel they have an obligation to warn others or because they’re angry. It could even be a combination. Q: Is that why [critics]( — even some members — are calling these groups toxic and hostile? I think we can all agree [on] this idea for a collective mobilization of women to protect themselves and people who are vulnerable. But at the same time, I think it’s important to think about: What if a man were to start a group called ‘Are You Dating This Woman?’ I think that would be absolutely inappropriate to do. A lot of the comments on these [groups] are very critical and not necessarily germane to the person, like comments about their body or appearance. And you see other people piling on comments that could be equally inappropriate. So we need to really think about this in a nuanced and holistic way ... These groups are empowering to a certain degree, but they can also foster a toxic environment and a toxic statement about men and their interactions between men and women. Q: Still, more than a hundred of these groups have popped up across the country. That must say something about the state of online dating, right? Entering relationships from a place of distrust or with the idea that people aren’t who they purport themselves to be is a sad state of affairs … These groups are a very interesting reflection of people’s discomfort with the state of dating and relationships, generally ... Technology now fills a void that institutions, neighborhoods, friends, and family once filled. So [these groups are] providing people with the capacity to verify [dates] in the same way that these other institutions would have done historically. Also, it speaks to the fact that people feel as though they need to be empowered in their dating — because they often feel disempowered and out of control when dating and searching for a partner. Psst, this interview has been edited for length and clarity. [Facebook]([Twitter]([Email](mailto:?body=One dating expert’s take on Are We Dating the Same Guy? groups #theSkimm%0A3Ftype%3Demailurl%26r%3DSKIMM%26utm_source%3Demail%26utm_medium%3Ddsshare%23custom) What's Happening 🙂 In culture… Looking for something to watch? Consider [a TV movie](...really. Or, consult [MovieTok](, which, spoiler, has lots of thoughts. Of course, if all else fails, there’s always [celebs eating chicken](. Also, [Halloween preps]( are in full swing. Terrifying. --------------------------------------------------------------- 🍴 In food… Just in case you needed another excuse to stop at HomeGoods: Turns out, it can be [great for groceries](. Meanwhile, bartenders are taking drinks to the next level with “[the fajita effect](.” And in other toast-worthy news, the [frozen negroni]( is even cooler than the OG. Same with the Hugo Spritz — aka the “[drink of summer](.” --------------------------------------------------------------- 👗 In style… Calling all tinned fish fans: [Sardines]( are having a fishion moment. Also, on the rise? [Sagging pants](, apparently. Plus, [hyper-femme sneakers]( have some people putting their best foot forward. Forward this to a friend. [Click here](mailto:?&subject=Check out this Daily Skimm Weekend newsletter&body=Check it out . Skimm Reads “[Who We Are Now](” by Lauryn Chamberlain...Is there anything better than a coming-of-age story in late summer? Lauryn Chamberlain’s latest novel alternates viewpoints between four best friends from college over the course of 15 years. It kicks off in 2006 the night before their graduation, and takes them through their 20s into their 30s. Along the way, they navigate love, loss, and success as both professionals and creatives. This one oozes nostalgia…so if you’re reminiscing about your “Girls” era, you know what to do. Asking for a Friend [Together with]([New York Life]( Q: How does life insurance work? A: [A life insurance policy]( is basically a contract where an insurance provider agrees to give your designated loved ones (AKA beneficiaries) a cash payout when you die — so long as you keep up your end of the deal and make monthly premium payments. Pro tip: Those premiums are typically lower the younger and healthier you are when you buy the policy. Head [here]( to learn more, and get some help deciding if you need life insurance. Skimm Picks Here are today’s recs to help you live a smarter life… 1. A blender that’ll have all your houseguests saying ‘I need one.’ Blame it on [this high-performance blender](’s BPA-free containers, 16 (yes, 16) unique functions, and eight subtle-yet-chic color options. Did we mention it’s over $200 off right now?* [Get it on sale]( --------------------------------------------------------------- 2. Subscriptions and experiences to spice up your life. Discover a few fun ways to [learn, create, watch, and do.]( Making memories > buying new stuff. [Get started]( --------------------------------------------------------------- 3. The best perfumes, according to HQ'rs. Presenting: [the fragrances we can't get enough of (right now)](. New signature scent = unlocked. [Start spritzing]( Psst...looking for more discounts on brands Skimm'rs love? Check out all of our exclusive promo codes [here](. Weekend Escape *Slams laptop shut until Monday.* We know the feeling. And we’ve got some tips for escape. Set your alarms: The [2023 FIFA Women’s World Cup final]( kicks off tomorrow at 6 am ET. England and Spain will battle it out on the pitch for their first-ever World Cup championship. Whether you’ve watched every minute or are more of a rookie, it’s not too late to get your head in the game. Here’s how… - Catch up on all the convos. Odds are, you may need a play-by-play of everything that you might’ve missed. For that, tune into podcasts like “[The Women’s Soccer Show](” or “[Attacking Third](.” You can also check in with two-time World Cup champs Tobin Heath and Christen Press as they break things down on “[The RE-CAP Show](.” Need more? [TikTok](’s got you covered with the drama off the pitch. - Watch (or rewatch) the highlights. This tournament’s been full of [surprises](. See: Olga Carmona’s [pivotal semifinal goal]( for La Roja. [Bia Zaneratto](’s strike against Panama. And the Lionesses’ victory over Australia, even after [Sam Kerr’s stunning shot](. Plus, [so much more](. - Play up your style. While female soccer fans have called a penalty over the [women’s kits](, you can still find a sporty ‘fit thanks to [blokecore](. Think: ‘80s- and ‘90s-inspired jerseys, jorts, and high-rise ankle socks. Or, turn to the tourney’s [most stylish squads]( for inspiration. Just don’t forget the [sport’s top accessory](. - Keep an eye on the goalies. [Goalkeepers]( have become this tournament’s breakout stars (have you seen the [penalty shootouts](?). That includes England’s Mary Earps, who’s [favored]( to take home the esteemed Golden Glove award. Plus, Spain’s [Cata Coll](, who made her international debut at this year’s tourney. News Quiz Let’s see how well you kept up with the Daily Skimm this week. Which salad chain is shaking things up with a new potato chip? A. Just Salad B. Chopt C. Sweetgreen D. Fresh & Co Check back tomorrow for the answer. But if you just need to know, you’ll find what you’re looking for [here](. Skimm’d by: Macy Alcido, Rasheeda Campbell, Maria del Carmen Corpus, Melissa Goldberg, and Margaret Wheeler Johnson --------------------------------------------------------------- Photos by fotostorm via Getty Images, courtesy of Jess Carbino, Dutton, Eurasia Sport Images / Contributor via Getty Images Design by theSkimm --------------------------------------------------------------- *PS: This is a sponsored post. Want to wake up with us every morning? [Subscribe to the Daily Skimm](. --------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------- Skimm'd something we missed? skimmthis@theSkimm.com Issues? [help@theSkimm.com](mailto:help@theskimm.com) [Advertise with us]( | [Careers]( [See our full sponsor agreement]( | [Update Your Preferences](esource=ds&date=20230819) | [Unsubscribe]( --------------------------------------------------------------- Copyright (c) 2023 theSkimm, All rights reserved. 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