'Please download in Microsoft Excel': Meet the tech set to monitor IT performance across central UK government [Mon Jan 24 2022]

Hi {NAME}, Daily Headlines - 24 January 2022 ***************************************************************** 'Please download in Microsoft Excel': Meet the tech set to monitor IT performance across central UK government Influencing billions in spending, the Cabinet Office will keep tabs on Whitehall with… a spreadsheet?!? ***************************************************************** Off-Prem * Tougher rules on targeted ads, deepfakes, crafty web design, and more? Euro lawmakers give a thumbs up 'This is strongly limiting the scope of maneuver by Big Tech', expert tells El Reg * UKCloud acquired: Public sector specialist finally bags investment from current chair and private equity after reporting steep losses Wolves no longer at the door of struggling Brit cloud slinger On-Prem * Another US president, time for another big Intel factory promise by another CEO Let's not get too excited about this right away * European silicon output shrinking, metal smelters closing as electricity prices quadruple, trade body warns Probably something to tackle before those chip fabs are built, eh? * You might want to consider the cost of not upgrading legacy tech, UK's Department for Work and Pensions told Processes relying on 1980s ICL mainframe contributed to £1bn pension black hole * Intel plunking down $20bn for at least two chip factories in Ohio Announcement scheduled for today as Gelsinger meets with Biden at the White House * EC president promises European Chips Act to quadruple homegrown production by 2030 'Most of our supplies come from outside Europe. This is a dependency and uncertainty we cannot afford' * China signs up 400 million new 5G subscribers in a year, more than doubling user population 730 million 5G services active in Middle Kingdom, while another 100 million 4G services came online too Security * Apple preps fix for Safari's web-history-leaking IndexedDB privacy bug Disclosure of WebKit flaw appears to have prodded iBiz to undertake repairs * Arm rages against the insecure chip machine with new Morello architecture Prototypes now available for testing * Why should I pay for that security option? Hijacking only happens to planes But if I give him my bank details, I'll be rich! * UK, Australia, to build 'network of liberty that will deter cyber attacks before they happen' Enhanced 'Cyber and Critical Technology Partnership' will transport crime to harsh penal regime on the other side of the world * Japan's Supreme Court rules cryptojacking scripts are not malware Coinhive-slinger wins on appeal * Russia's Putin out the idea of a broad cryptocurrency ban Central bank worries that block-bucks reduce government control and are used by crims Software * Desktop-deprived Linus Torvalds releases first release candidate of ‘not huge’ kernel 5.17 Life on the road increases reliance on cloudy tools instead of Emperor Penguin's preferred local tests * Meta trains data2vec neural network to understand speech, images, text so it can 'understand the world' Whatever it takes, Mark * Nvidia pushes crowd-pleasing container support into AI Enterprise suite As long as you're running on VMware * Wolfing down ebooks during lockdown? You might want to check out Calibre, the Swiss Army ebook tool When audiobooks just take too darn long... * 'Please download in Microsoft Excel': Meet the tech set to monitor IT performance across central UK government Influencing billions in spending, the Cabinet Office will keep tabs on Whitehall with… a spreadsheet?!? Offbeat * Dog forgets all about risk of drowning in a marsh as soon as drone dangles a sausage It's not the wurst idea in the world * Almost there: James Webb Space Telescope frees its mirrors and prepares for insertion Freed of launch restraints, mirror segments can waggle at will * Multi-level marketing corporation that sells weightloss products sues ex-exec over 'fraudulent' Dell deal Alleges he had an off-the-books agreement with reseller * '95% original' film star Spitfire could be yours for a mere £4.5m (or 0.05 Pogbas) Freshly overhauled, several careful owners * Joint European Torus celebrates 100,000 pulses: Neither Brexit nor middle age has stopped '80s era experiment Fusion energy projects nearing 40th anniversary * BOFH: What a beautiful classic car. Shame if anything were to happen to it And look, your COVID pass is all melted... * 'Can you identify your assailants?' Yes, they were pixelated! I'd know them anywhere! 'Inside' knowledge on the image database conundrum – at 25 frames per second * If you want less CGI and more real effects in movies, you may get your wish: Inflatable film studio to orbit Earth What a retirement for the ISS: Gaining a totally feasible 'state-of-the-art media production capability' ------------------------------------------------------------------------ This email was sent to {EMAIL} You can update your preferences here: or unsubscribe from this list: Situation Publishing Ltd, 315 Montgomery Street, 9th & 10th Floors, San Francisco, CA 94104, USA The Register and its contents are Copyright © 2022 Situation Publishing. All rights reserved. Find our Privacy Policy here: