What the @#$%&!? Microsoft bans nudity, swearing in Skype, emails, Office 365 docs [Thu Mar 29 2018]

Hi {NAME}, Daily Headlines - 29 March 2018 ***************************************************************** What the @#$%&!? Microsoft bans nudity, swearing in Skype, emails, Office 365 docs Adults-only Xbox games are OK – but you can't publicly tell Cortana to go screw itself ***************************************************************** Business * Australian Senate passes meaningless motion that says encryption is very useful Token effort won't stop not-backdoors legislation * Get the message, PHBs: New York City mulls ban on after-hours biz email File under: Yeah, good luck with that, nice job you used to have * Chin up, SMEs. You might get crumbs from Big Tech tax clampdown – UK MPs Want more govt business, you say?* You're a riot, old chum * GoDaddy told off for reeling in punters with 'misleading' prices Calling all the Basic twitchers... * What the @#$%&!? Microsoft bans nudity, swearing in Skype, emails, Office 365 docs Adults-only Xbox games are OK – but you can't publicly tell Cortana to go screw itself * India's prime minister accused of privacy breaches Narendra Modi's app may be a bit too slurpy Data Centre * Wow, machine learning, what a snoozefest... less so if you strap a bunch of GPUs to your storage GPU-boosted system market is, like, literally so hot right now * Yes, Emergency Service Network will be late and cost more - UK perm sec It's agile, innit? * Up the stack with you: Microsoft's Denali project flashes skinny SSD controllers The goal? Commoditise the data centre NVMe SSD world * 10Mbps for world+dog, hoots UK.gov, and here is how we're doing it Yeah, expect your bills to go up * Cisco separates switching and routing software from hardware Open networking finally comes to Switchzilla as IOS XR, IOS XE, Nexus OS added to disaggregation strategy * Linux Foundation lays out welcome mat for AT&T network OS 'DANOS' code hoped to run 100,000 routers will go open source in H2 2018 DevOps * What a Docker shocker: Founder, CTO Solomon Hykes takes a hike Container tech darling suits up for enterprise sales * Take the dashboard too literally and your brains might end up all over it Ooo, pretty colours. But what if the data or interpretation sucks? Emergent Tech * Uber self-driving car death riddle: Was LIDAR blind spot to blame? Biz scaled back number of sensors from five to just one * Try our new driverless car software says Nvidia, as it suspends driverless car trials Post crash test hits share price * Tesla crash investigation causes dip in 'leccycar firm's share price Smash 'n' burn incident in US singes Elon Musk-led company's financials * Gone in 60.121 seconds: Your guide to the pricey new gear Nvidia teased at its annual GPU fest Yours if you can afford it... and wait long for the fabs to make the chips Personal Tech * Huawei consumer biz pres: Are we in talks with Trump? Nope We have other markets * Fed up with Facebook data slurping? Firefox has a cunning plan The Facebook Container add-on quarantines the social network to limit data harvesting * Cambridge Analytica 'privatised colonising operation', not a 'legitimate business', says whistleblower Chris Wylie makes explosive allegations in session with MPs Security * It's baaack – WannaCry nasty soars through Boeing's computers NSA-augmented ransomware hits snoops' home air industry * Running Drupal? You need to patch, patch, patch right now! Website building biz warns exploit may come in hours * Internet of insecure Things: Software still riddled with security holes Which means devices could be pwned by crooks * Most FTSE 100 boards kept in the dark about cyber resilience plans Infosec bods worry it could be used against firms if disclosed * Privacy activists to UK plod: Wanna slurp folks' phone records? Come back with a warrant Lack of regulation and records risks abuse, says charity * Intel shrugs off ‘new’ side-channel attacks on branch prediction units and SGX Been there, mitigated that, got the class actions, says Chipzilla Science * Boffins stalk house-hunting bees, find colony behaves kind of like a human brain Oh do beehive! * Tantalising Tabby's Star teases watchers with big dimming event No 'alien' megastructure, but lots of ongoing weirdness Bootnotes * Are you able to read this headline? Then you're not Julian Assange. His broadband is unplugged Ecuador puts WikiLeaks boss in digital time-out over comments * There are 10 types of people in the world, but there is only one Melvyn Verity puts a Bragg in your shell-like * Free whitepaper * Web threats: Challenges and solutions Web threats employ blended techniques, an explosion of variants, and targeted regional attacks. 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