J. Lo and Ben Affleck’s Stunts Have Been a Pandemic Blessing

Everything we can’t stop loving, hating, and thinking about this week in pop culture. [Manage newsletters]( [View in browser]( [Image] with Kevin Fallon Everything we can’t stop loving, hating, and thinking about this week in pop culture. This Week: - Bennifer, masters of their craft. - Girls5eva is extremely my jam. - Fat Will Smith has already disappointed us. - Already dreading the Elon Musk SNL. - The best magazine cover of the week. Bennifer Is Back?! On Saturday, you can watch [Jennifer Lopez]( in a makeshift enchanted forest wearing a shimmering bodysuit with dramatic bell sleeves that eclipse her own height as [she leads a stadium]( in Los Angeles through a singalong of Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline” in the name of equitable distribution of the COVID-19 vaccine. Is this a chaotic game of doomsday Mad Libs? Or is it a beautifully bedazzled manifestation of hope and the future, a J. Lo-led future in which hands, once again, can be touching hands? Reaching out. Touching me. And, yes, also touching you. Lopez is one of the celebrities who appeared at [Vax Live: The Concert to Reunite the World](, the Global Citizen-produced event that calls on world leaders to unite to help make global access to the vaccine available. Beyond its noble message, there’s a surreal optimism to the concert: Artists performing live to crowds again. The rest of us can watch it on Saturday as it simultaneously broadcasts on ABC, CBS, Fox, and YouTube. [Alternate text] You know who else appears at Vax Live? Ben Affleck. Wee-oo! Wee-oo! Call Us Weekly and sound the couple alert alarm! The entertainment industry loves nothing more than a decades-old reboot that nobody asked for. So maybe none of us should have been taken by surprise when they who were once Bennifer were spotted [“hanging out” a reported “multiple times”]( this week. This is just weeks after [Lopez and Alex Rodriguez ended their engagement]( and several months following Affleck’s split from Ana de Armas. I do not believe that the couple, who were engaged in 2002 and had the misfortune of being the most famous celebrity relationship at a craven turning point for the tabloid industry, are rekindling any sort of romance. (Though if they are? Hot.) They have long been friends. Friends hang out. Whatever. The timing of it all, though, so soon after the breakup news and knowing exactly how the media and all our hearts were going to run with it? The devil works hard, and the J. Lo publicity team all have masters degrees from the Lucifer B. Devil School of Promotion. And it’s not just her. No one stunts the media better than Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck. Neither Lopez nor Affleck have released new projects during the pandemic. No new album. No new movies. (As self-care, we have erased Zack Snyder’s Justice League from our permanent memory.) Yet no two celebrities have kept us more entertained. That Lopez ranks as one of the industry’s [most electric live entertainers]( has made her especially suited to dazzle and distract us during a tough year, performing at scattered telethons, award shows, and events. But it’s not just been the usual jaw-dropping dancing. It’s been some atypically weird shit, too. Things like covering Neil Diamond on a set from FernGully. At an earlier Global Citizen telethon, [she covered Barbra Streisand’s “People,”]( a swerve if I’ve ever heard one from an entertainer not traditionally known for being a vocalist. On New Year’s Eve, she [covered Aerosmith’s “Dream On,”]( and yes, she went for that note. Hell, she remixed “This Land Is Your Land” with her own song [at the Inauguration of Joe Biden](, managing the rare combination of being both historic and iconic while also in questionable taste. Off-stage, there was the Alex Rodriguez soap opera. She narrowly escaped the teeth of an [alleged sex cannibal]( (phew!) in a [last-minute casting switch]( in the lead-up to her new film. Instagram gossip account Deuxmoi, both the bane of my existence and my most unshakable addiction, seemed to pendulum swing between anonymous reports of her diva behavior and her legendary professionalism on a daily basis. Capping it all off by stoking some Bennifer nostalgia and hysteria? We do not deserve. Then there’s Affleck. No man has been more relatable, let alone more popular, while doing absolutely nothing. How damn long was that stretch of the pandemic when every day brought new photos of Affleck picking up his Dunkin Donuts order, to which the world would give a daily standing ovation? Ben Affleck! He’s just like us. He’s gotta have his Dunkin and looks like absolute shit while getting it, like he’s just had enough of the world, dammit. Has there ever been a more boring couple that we inexplicably became obsessed with than [Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas](? They, like the rest of us, would go on their daily constitutional during lockdown, strolling hand-in-hand. The paparazzi would snap a photo. And we liiiiived for it! Then there was the saga of the life-sized [Ana de Armas cardboard cutout]( thrown out in Affleck’s trash after they broke up. The number of questions it begged—Did Affleck really have a cardboard cutout of his girlfriend in his home?—didn’t matter. It was the lunatic energy we needed in month 475 of pandemic boredom. And while the rest of the world got excited about the potential of a Bennifer reunion, for me the real news this past week was the [TikTok posted]( by a girl who claimed that she matched with Affleck on the exclusive dating app Raya, but didn’t believe it was really him. When she unmatched him, he allegedly sent her a video on Instagram saying that it was real. I can’t verify if this is a real video or a deepfake of Affleck generated to go viral. All I know is it was supreme Divorced Dad energy and the best thing Affleck has contributed to the culture since Good Will Hunting. Are Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck getting back together? Who knows. But they do deserve happiness, especially after this last year, in which they have given just so much to us. Girls5eva Is So Much Dang Fun When God made it so that his creations could hear, I truly believe it was because he knew the gift that was in store, the greatest one he could give to us and to the entire concept of sound: Pop girl groups. Three-to-five thinly voiced women in coordinated outfits barely harmonizing to an absolute banger of a hook is the greatest pleasure we have in life. And so what a blessing it was to hear that Tina Fey would be producing a comedy series about a former pop girl group’s second chance at fame, and the miracle of all miracles for it to be so blissfully, ridiculously funny. [Alternate text] Girls5eva, which debuted [this week on Peacock](, is the rare case of something you look forward to living up to your expectations of it. A cast that slays to the precise interests of a very specific demographic (gay, pop-culture obsessed millennials)—in this case, [Sara Bareilles](, [Busy Philipps](, [Paula Pell](, and Hamilton star [Renee Elise Goldsberry](— thrives in the Tina Feyland of rapid-fire one-liners soaked in utterly random entertainment references, with original music that perfectly threads the Y2K pop vibe while also satirizing it. (If you don’t dust off your Dream CD and start dancing to “[He Loves U Not](” after bingeing the show, did you actually appreciate it?) In [this age of #TooMuchTV]( and new streaming services sprouting up every time I blink my eyes, it’s also a case when the sheer number of platforms seems like a great thing. Wonderful as it is, I’m not sure Girls5eva would have been picked up by a traditional network. (I’m still haunted by [NBC’s decision to pass]( on a comedy pilot produced by Tina Fey starring Busy Philipps and Casey Wilson in 2017.) The series centers on the members of former girl group Girls5eva (“We’re gonna be famous five-ever / Because forever’s too short”), whose fame burned fast and bright 20 years ago. Now in their forties and dejected about how their lives turned out, they unexpectedly reunite after a rapper uses their old song as a hook. They decide to give another go at it, battling ageism, sexism, and their own neuroses as they try to claw their way back to the pinnacle of girl group success: Performing at Jingle Ball. The jokes are a riot. Goldsberry, playing the diva, owns a transparent grand piano she named Ghislaine. “I named it 20 years ago. It was a pretty name then, it’s a pretty name now. I’m not changing it.” At one point, Fey cameos in big-hair, big-boob drag to play a twisted Dolly Parton hallucination. There is a plot about Bareilles’ character fearing that her only-child son will grow up to be a “New York Lonely Boy” whose best friend is his doorman; it is one of my favorite comedy bits of the year. Whatever energy it was that made [Ted Lasso such perfect escapism]( for the most traumatic part of the pandemic—a nice, buttery biscuit delivered on the daily, a pleasant and reasonably handsome man with the rare mustache that works, the idea of working hard to unite and accomplish a goal—Girls5eva, with its sprint through zaniness and invigorating message about getting yourself back out there even if it might be scary, might be the comedy series to capture our transition back into a celebratory world. Mark Wahlberg and Will Smith are Fat Now? In headline-making news, Mark Wahlberg [gained 20 pounds in three weeks](. And, oh boy, he’s on his way to packing on about 10 more. Marky Mark, whose abs each hold their own very special place in pop iconography, has been consuming eight meals and roughly 7,000 calories a day. Sounds like my pandemic diet! Ay-o! Of course, this is all just for a role and, as with everything to do with eating and body shape in Hollywood, sounds like absolute, unnecessary torture. His personal chef [detailed the eating schedule to E! News](, and it involves waking up at 3 am to be force fed his first meal, consuming only clean and natural foods, and eating about 12 eggs a day. Some real Gaston shit. This comes on the heels of Will Smith going viral for [an Instagram photo]( of himself with what, for him, is an uncharacteristic paunch but for the rest of us would be an aspirational figure at age 52. It was captioned, “I’m gonna be real wit yall - I’m in the worst shape of my life.” For all of the problematic body-image messaging, it was a hoot to see the photo with the candid, self-effacing caption. But, ah, how quickly we all forget: Nothing in Hollywood is genuinely good. Two days after posting the photo, Smith announced a new YouTube series that would track his hard journey to getting fit again. Which is coincidentally the same idea for a project I have had in production for the last 12 years and my lawyers WILL be in touch, Mr. Smith. But seriously, Smith’s post, beyond damning what is a pretty standard body shape, is no longer even fun. It was timed as a stunt to promote this series. Kyndall Cunningham [wrote a great column]( about the cynicism and the dangers of all this in The Daily Beast this week that you should definitely read. Especially if you’re like me, a person who can’t stand the celebrity body, diet, and exercise fascination we have as a culture but who also will never stop being fascinated with celebrity body, diet, and exercise. I get it. I buy a Men’s Health magazine, study the cover star’s workout regimen with the rigor of Elle Woods about to take the LSAT, do the exercises listed in it exactly once, and then spend the next two weeks posing in the mirror wondering when my abs are going to show up. They aren’t ever going to, because, in addition to discipline, I don’t have the one thing celebrities do that I truly believe is the secret to their amazing body transformations: Money. Elon Musk on SNL! I’m Already Exhausted! Elon Musk is hosting Saturday Night Live this week, which is so goddamn stupid. In deleted tweets, a few cast members seemed to [quietly rebel](against the idea of a union-busting, COVID conspiracy-spreading, boorish billionaire being given the comedy platform. A [questionable rumor]( circulated that cast members “won’t be forced to appear” on the show. Co-head writer Michael Che [said he’s “excited”]( for Musk to host. It’s been a whole thing. Anyway, [Musk tweeted]( that he was “throwing out some skit ideas for SNL” and [asked his followers](, “What should I do?” It is my sincerest and deepest hope, wish, and prayer that the show exclusively airs sketches that were pitched by Musk, exactly how he dictated them, with no edits. [Alternate text] Feast Your Eyes on Michaela Coel [Alternate text] If you need me over the next few days, I’ll be busy staring at [this Variety cover]( of I May Destroy You’s Michaela Coel, shedding a single tear on an endless loop until my body is dehydrated. [Alternate text] - Hacks: The Jean Smartaissance has arrived and it is GOOD. (Thurs. on HBO Max) - Ziwe: A daring late-night show chock full of truly iconic guests. (Sun. on Showtime) - Together Together: We as a nation must not rest until Patti Harrison is an A-list star. (Tues. on VOD) [Alternate text] - The Hills: New Beginnings: Can we just send this drippy reboot to Paris? (Wed. on MTV) Advertisement [Facebook]( [Twitter]( [Instagram]( © Copyright 2021 The Daily Beast Company LLC 555 W. 18th Street, New York NY 10011 [Privacy Policy]( If you are on a mobile device or cannot view the images in this message, [click here]( to view this email in your browser. To ensure delivery of these emails, please add emails@thedailybeast.com to your address book. If you no longer wish to receive these emails, or think you have received this message in error, you can [safely unsubscribe](.