Everything we canât stop loving, hating, and thinking about this week in pop culture.
[View in Browser]( [Subscribe]( [Image] with Kevin Fallon Everything we canât stop loving, hating, and thinking about this week in pop culture.
This Week: - Shonda Rhimesâ sexy Christmas gift to us all. - Promising Young Woman meets Paris Hilton. - A Riz Ahmed appreciation. - Gal Gadot, what you doing? - A very dishy SoulCycle investigation. The Bridgerton Christmas Musical Itâs a bit of a Scrooge-y Christmas season for all of us, and so [Shonda Rhimes]( gave us Regé-Jean Page, as a little treat. Page is [the male lead of Bridgerton](, the new period soap opera that marks Rhimesâ first project to air from her [massive Netflix deal](. [Alternate text] The series itself is like a thought experiment asking, âWhat if Jane Austen had seen Gossip Girl and was then asked to write a binge-worthy TV series that is meant to be consumed with a vibrator in hand?â And Page is the answer to that query, an actor who a colleague of mineâwhose identity I will not reveal in order to protect her from future restraining ordersâdecidedly ruled âthe hottest man I have ever seen.â But Page as Simon Basset, the brooding and emotionally tortured hunk stalking the outer circlesânot to mention the libidosâof Regency Londonâs society season, is but one fantastical draw of Bridgerton, particularly with its Christmas Day release date at the end of this cursed pandemic year. It surely is not what Rhimes or Netflix planned when it came to how or when to launch this very expensive-looking, very escapist new show. But, as it stands, it arrives with serious vibes of, âGot nothing to do over holiday break? Hereâs sex and corsets from the Greyâs Anatomy lady.â And, truly, God bless us, every one. Bridgerton is set in that British society era weâve festishized to the point of historical fiction in our minds, when balls were staged with the sole purpose of matching one familyâs come-of-age daughter to anotherâs eligible bachelor. A time when decorum is such a priority it could only be fruitful ground for salacious gossip, which is precisely what Bridgerton seizes on. Enter Lady Whistledown, an omniscient character voiced by Julie Andrews who pens the Grosvenorâs Square version of Page Six. (If Iâve said it once, Iâve said it a thousand times: Julie Andrews is the new Kristen Bell.) Sheâs all up in everyoneâs business, to the point that even the Queen is keeping tabs on whoâs in Whistledownâs favor and whose scandals sheâs raking through the mud. Whistledownâs main preoccupation is Daphne Bridgerton, the âdiamondâ of the society season; itâs Tinsley Mortimer, if you will. After a few stressful minutes of âyou canât tell me thatâs not Sansa Starkâ while watching Phoebe Dynevorâs performance, youâll be swept away in her infuriatingly complicated love story with Simon Basset. If youâve read any of the advance coverage of Bridgerton, youâll have heard that this show fucks. As in there is sex. Lots of it. And not like Scandal âthis is kind of hot and then the camera cuts awayâ sex. There are butts! And boobs! And at Christmastime! Oh come all ye faithful, indeed. The series takes a few episodes to get to all the humping youâve heard about. At first I wondered, where was all the sex I was promised? And then it showed up. And came again and again. It was so incessant I needed to press pause and spend a few minutes with God. At one point, two characters are having a heated argument about the state of their lives together, they briefly pause for a violent round of cunnilingus on a staircase, and then they continue their argument. This is a big fuss about what is, ultimately, just one element of the showâalbeit an undeniably important one. But that underscores how Bridgerton actually makes good on the intrigue of a legendary network television creator taking her universeâliterally Shondalandâto a streaming service. Itâs not just the explicitness of the love scenes, or even a no-brainer like the budget sheâs afforded to make a show that looks like this, as if PBS sent all of Downton Abbey through a Baz Luhrmann Snapchat filter and this is what came out the other side. [Alternate text] Too many of these major streaming deals have found their creators essentially doing their same schtick, just with longer running times, more narrative bloat, and, [some would argue](, a diminishing return on quality. With Bridgerton, Rhymes seems to genuinely be capitalizing on doing things narrativelyânot just production-wiseâthat she never would have been able to do on broadcast TV. A Regency soap opera pulsing with lust? Itâs the circa 2020 industry conundrum where it will be an undeniable, massive hit for Netflix, but never would have existed anywhere else. I mean, folks, itâs not perfect. There are some story yarns that range from boring to perhaps even offensive. For all the celebration of the inclusive, seemingly gender-blind casting, thereâs such a half-hearted swing toward a queer storyline that you wonder why bother at all. And the playfulness with production can careen from cute to twee quite quickly. But honestly⦠whatever. Itâs a juicy show that will get you hard and make you cryâa real capturing of life under lockdownâwhile serving up a cast so stacked with attractive actors that by the time storied British hottie [Freddie Stroma]( shows up, he starts to look almost plain. Letâs all just be grateful. The Yearâs Best Movie Scene, Featuring Paris Hilton Sometimes it takes almost 15 years to come to a painful realization. To admit something difficult, to confess a personal fault, to finally see things for what they truly areâand always were. To see, for example, that Paris Hilton may have created one of the millenniumâs perfect pop songs. To be fair, the best among us were always hip to the fact that, with her 2006 song â[Stars Are Blind](,â the socialite had somehow crafted the quintessential confection of swooning puppy love: the innocuous lyrics; a breathy, almost bored vocal made all the easier to sing along to; and a lilting beat like a beach ball bouncing in the wind down a sandy beachâsomehow both embarrassingly reminiscent of Muzak, yet also soothing in a way that the chaotic bells and whistles elsewhere on the pop scene failed to embrace. Now, all these years later, the song is finally cool. [Alternate text] After building buzz for almost an entire year off [its Sundance debut in January](, Promising Young Woman was finally released Christmas Day. The film, written and directed by [rising talent Emerald Fennell](, stars Carey Mulligan as a barista on a #MeToo revenge mission. Fennell lays sticks of dynamite under every trope that exists for how to tell a thriller like this tackling such serious issues. Her film is girly, flirty, fashionable, acidically funny, and boasts a catchy soundtrack populated with bops by Britney Spears, Charli XCX, and, yes, Paris Hilton. The truth is, the Paris Hilton âStars Are Blindâ scene may, when it comes down to it, be my favorite scene of the year. Mulliganâs character, Cassie, is really trying to allow herself to exist in a world where justice is served, forgiveness happens, and happy things like love are possible. Thatâs how she ends up in the giggly throes of a budding romance with a former classmate [played by Bo Burnham](, delivering one of the most irresistible rom-com male lead performances in recent memoryâyou know, were he actually acting in a rom-com at all. The big set piece that lets you know that the two really have fallen for each other takes place in a drug store. âStars Are Blindâ starts playing on the speakers, and Burnhamâs character starts lip-syncing to it, goofily dancing up and down the aisles. Heâs so charming that, instead of being mortified, Cassie joins in. Itâs equal parts rapturous and ridiculous. Itâs a perfect movie scene. When I interviewed Fennell earlier this month ([read that story here](), I asked her about using Hiltonâs song. It wasnât just for attention or as a joke. Itâs a choice that mattered at a pivotal point in a serious arc of a complicated movie. âFor me, that scene is so much about what falling in love feels like,â she said. âIf youâre someone like Cassie whoâs been alone for so long, whoâs been on this kind of grim, relentless road, the thing thatâs gonna pull you away from it needs to be extraordinary. So it needed to feel like the most romantic moment in the world, because even she has to not be able to resist it. And we as an audience will also be rooting for it. Because we want things to happen. We want romance to be able to save the day.â Paris Hilton, savior of romance. Thatâs hot. Riz Ahmed Is So Good in The Sound of Metal Listen, itâs not possible to be first to everything. So it took almost a month of colleagues tweeting its praise and the homescreen on my Amazon Firestick practically bullying me with an advertisement every time I logged on to finally check out the new film The Sound of Metal. Iâm so glad I did. The film stars Riz Ahmed, the astonishing actor who made his [âoh wow, hi, hello thereâ¦â arrival]( to our collective attention with the HBO limited crime series The Night Of. He plays a drummer and recovering addict whose life is upended when he begins to lose his hearing. Ahmed gives one of those âholy shit, he was so good in thatâ performances that really takes you by surprise. And, while itâs entirely besides the point, he looks like this. [Alternate text] Iâm surprised that Best Actor, the awards category I usually care least about (men, how boring) is shaping up to be my favorite race. Thereâs Ahmed, Chadwick Boseman (Ma Raineyâs Black Bottom), Anthony Hopkins (The Father), Delroy Lindo (Da Five Bloods), Steven Yeun (Minari), Kingsley Ben-Adir (One Night in Miami), and Tom Hanks (News of the World.) Though, please, keep the atrociously miscast Gary Oldman far from this race. (Mank u, next.) And one last endorsement: Paul Raci, a hearing person who grew up with deaf parents, absolutely must be a part of the Supporting Actor awards conversation for his âIâm going to take your heart, fold it like a paper airplane, and toss it off a cliffâ performance as the sober living manager. Gal Gadot Continues to Stun Good on Gal Gadot for her consistency, which in this case means bookending this god-awful year by being absolutely embarrassing on the internet. Iâm still too scarred by it to fully revisit that [celeb-filled âImagineâ video]( she orchestrated at the beginning of the pandemic, but rest assured that it did happen and, yes, it can still hurt you. Now, the Wonder Woman 1984 actress has spent the last few days [pretending to be her character](, Diana Prince, on Instagram, posting pictures and writing captions as if she is the superhero herself. Listen, Iâm not âthe audience,â whoever that may be, for these superhero movies. So rather than pass judgment on Wonder Woman 1984, Iâll just say it is a film that stars Kristen Wiig as a villain in â80s leopard-print drag and yet somehow was [described as highlighting]( ânot only the dire state of the live-action superhero genre in film, but the dire state of Hollywood filmmaking as a whole.â Hmm. In any case, hereâs Gal Gadot pretending to be Wonder Woman [eating a scoop of ice cream](. [Alternate text] What Happens at SoulCycle⦠No Longer Stays There Have I been known to cry on occasion while sweating on an indoor bicycle going nowhere while a dubstep remix of a Sia song blasts over the loudspeakers? No comment. Did I cringe, gasp, applaud, and, yes, even gag while reading [Alex Abad-Santosâ Vox exposé]( on SoulCycleâs rise and fall(ish), and the underbelly beneath the cult of fitness exclusivity? Undeniably. If you donât read the whole thing, might I suggest hitting âcommand + Fâ for the word âtampon?â [Alternate text] [Alternate text] - Soul: Itâs not the holidays if youâre not crying to a Pixar movie. (Friday on Disney+) - Promising Young Woman: A traumatizing delight. (Friday on VOD) [Alternate text] - Wonder Woman 1984: At least you didnât have to go to theaters just to be let down. (Friday on HBO Max) - The Masked Dancer: Like The Masked Singer, but with dancing, as was foretold in my nightmares. (Sunday on Fox) Advertisement
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