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The Big Idea: 21 Days of Ideas Into Action [Open this email in your browser]( Get inspired to take action in your life with [The Big Idea: 21 Days of Ideas Into Action]( from TED in partnership with the [Brightline Initiative](. From Monday, December 10, through Sunday, December 30, you'll receive a TED Talk recommendation each day with ideas on how to make a positive impact in your life and move toward your goals -- delivered to your inbox (for free). Enjoy a preview below! [Subscribe to "The Big Idea"]( Spend more time being with your friends ... and less time trying to change them By Emily McManus, Managing editor, TED Bill Bernat seems like a good friend to have. He also has depression; and in this frank and funny talk (with one of the best first lines ever), he gives us the do's and don'ts for being friends with someone who happens to be depressed. Like: "One of the most off-putting things you can say is, 'Just get over it.' Great idea -- love it! It's just ... we already thought of that. The absence of the ability to 'just get over it' is depression." It's specific, actionable advice -- and yet, one thought from his talk felt bigger than that, felt like the key to every kind of friendship and family-ship. As he puts it: "Don't let a lack of bubbly happiness freak you out. We can be sad and OK at the same time. I'm going to say that again, because in our society, we're taught the opposite, and so it's counterintuitive. People can be sad and OK at the same time." This last thought was jaw-dropping for me. Bill is giving all of us permission to meet our friends, family, coworkers right where they are. We don't need to re-wire their emotional state, we don't need to fix them or cheer them up. To be with them, to listen, is more than enough. For them and for us. [Watch "How to connect with depressed friends"]( [Subscribe to "The Big Idea"]( [Recommend this talk]( Join TED Recommends Looking for your next favorite TED Talk? Join [TED Recommends]( and get personally recommended talks delivered right to your inbox. [Sign up »]( Copyright © 2018 TED, All rights reserved. We love you. You're receiving the TED Talks weekly newsletter because you subscribed to it on TED.com. (Was this forwarded by a friend? You can sign up here: ) Our postal address is: TED 330 Hudson Street 11th Floor New York, NY 10013 USA [Cancel your subscription]( [Change your email preferences]( [TED logo](