How Much Should You Be Asked to Donate for a Colleague’s Gift?

I am a bit appalled. [View in browser](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP4Q1AWh0dHBzOi8vbWVzc2FnaW5nLWN1c3RvbS1uZXdzbGV0dGVycy5ueXRpbWVzLmNvbS90ZW1wbGF0ZS9vYWt2Mj9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD01MiZlbWM9ZWRpdF9tYV8yMDIyMDQyMyZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD01OTI5NCZubD10aGUtbmV3LXlvcmstdGltZXMtbWFnYXppbmUmcHJvZHVjdENvZGU9TUEmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MiZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTkwMDcyJnRlPTEmdXJpPW55dCUzQSUyRiUyRm5ld3NsZXR0ZXIlMkY0MDlmMjBjNS00MDJlLTU2YjYtYmFlNi1mMmQ4OTNkODNiNTImdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkN1cDbnl0QgpiYaDVY2LRuJAkUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~)|[nytimes.com](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP0S9aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMjIwNDIzJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTU5Mjk0Jm5sPXRoZS1uZXcteW9yay10aW1lcy1tYWdhemluZSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9OTAwNzImdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmJhoNVjYtG4kCRSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~)[Continue reading the main story](#a11y-skip-ad-marquee) ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP0RtaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9MTYxOTY2JmxpPU1BJm09YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcD1NQV8yMDIyMDQyM1cDbnl0QgpiYaDVY2LRuJAkUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ [The New York Times Magazine](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP0TNaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vc2VjdGlvbi9tYWdhemluZT9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD01MiZlbWM9ZWRpdF9tYV8yMDIyMDQyMyZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD01OTI5NCZubD10aGUtbmV3LXlvcmstdGltZXMtbWFnYXppbmUmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MiZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTkwMDcyJnRlPTEmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkN1cDbnl0QgpiYaDVY2LRuJAkUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) April 23, 2022 [[Article Image] Illustration by Tomi Um](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP0TpaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMi8wNC8xOS9tYWdhemluZS9jb3dvcmtlci1naWZ0LW1vbmV5Lmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAyMjA0MjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NTkyOTQmbmw9dGhlLW5ldy15b3JrLXRpbWVzLW1hZ2F6aW5lJnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTImc2VnbWVudF9pZD05MDA3MiZ0ZT0xJnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDdXA255dEIKYmGg1WNi0biQJFIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [The Ethicist How Much Should You Be Asked to Donate for a Colleague’s Gift? The magazine’s Ethicist columnist on when co-workers may feel pressured into making a donation at the office — and more. By Kwame Anthony Appiah](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP0TpaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMi8wNC8xOS9tYWdhemluZS9jb3dvcmtlci1naWZ0LW1vbmV5Lmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAyMjA0MjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NTkyOTQmbmw9dGhlLW5ldy15b3JrLXRpbWVzLW1hZ2F6aW5lJnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTImc2VnbWVudF9pZD05MDA3MiZ0ZT0xJnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDdXA255dEIKYmGg1WNi0biQJFIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) I am a doctor. My colleague’s spouse was recently diagnosed with early-stage breast cancer. I privately communicated my support and offered to help, even though they’re very self-sufficient and have lots of resources, both financially and emotionally. A nurse in my department is putting together a gift basket for the wife and also collecting donations for the couple to rent a weekend cabin. The nurse says, “Most people are donating between $50-$100.” I can easily afford to give $100, but I know that this couple don’t need the money, and I am a bit appalled that nurses, tech and other hospital staff (who aren’t as well paid as I am) would be asked to donate money to a couple who are comfortable financially and have no barriers to renting a vacation cabin. Do I participate in a gift that I feel is well intentioned but misguided? [Read the Ethicist’s response here](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRkRlqgP0TpaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMi8wNC8xOS9tYWdhemluZS9jb3dvcmtlci1naWZ0LW1vbmV5Lmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAyMjA0MjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NTkyOTQmbmw9dGhlLW5ldy15b3JrLXRpbWVzLW1hZ2F6aW5lJnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTImc2VnbWVudF9pZD05MDA3MiZ0ZT0xJnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDdXA255dEIKYmGg1WNi0biQJFIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA). Subscribe Today We hope you’ve enjoyed this newsletter, which is made possible through subscriber support. 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