Opinion Today: It’s time to grieve

How do we mourn the parts of our lives we’re still losing? [View in browser](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP4QnAWh0dHBzOi8vbWVzc2FnaW5nLWN1c3RvbS1uZXdzbGV0dGVycy5ueXRpbWVzLmNvbS90ZW1wbGF0ZS9vYWt2Mj9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD0zOSZlbWM9ZWRpdF90eV8yMDIxMTIyMyZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD00ODU1MSZubD1vcGluaW9uLXRvZGF5JnByb2R1Y3RDb2RlPVRZJnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTImc2VnbWVudF9pZD03Nzc2MyZ0ZT0xJnVyaT1ueXQlM0ElMkYlMkZuZXdzbGV0dGVyJTJGNDY2YTM5ZjgtYTg5MS01N2NkLWE0NmEtZTBiZDE3YmY5MTlkJnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDdXA255dEIKYbvMccRhbHHjU1IbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA)|[nytimes.com](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0SvaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTM5JmVtYz1lZGl0X3R5XzIwMjExMjIzJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTQ4NTUxJm5sPW9waW5pb24tdG9kYXkmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MiZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTc3NzYzJnRlPTEmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkN1cDbnl0Qgphu8xxxGFsceNTUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~)[Continue reading the main story](#a11y-skip-ad-marquee) ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0RtaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9MTYyMTM5JmxpPVRZJm09YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcD1UWV8yMDIxMTIyM1cDbnl0Qgphu8xxxGFsceNTUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ [Read more from Opinion](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0S-aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vc2VjdGlvbi9vcGluaW9uP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTM5JmVtYz1lZGl0X3R5XzIwMjExMjIzJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTQ4NTUxJm5sPW9waW5pb24tdG9kYXkmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MiZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTc3NzYzJnRlPTEmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkN1cDbnl0Qgphu8xxxGFsceNTUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) December 23, 2021 [Author Headshot](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TAaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vYnkvbGluZHNheS1jcm91c2U_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) By [Lindsay Crouse](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TAaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vYnkvbGluZHNheS1jcm91c2U_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) Opinion Writer and Producer In March 2020, for the first time in my adult life, my calendar was totally, stunningly, empty. I accepted the change, assuming our newfound stasis would be temporary. Part of me was grateful to be shaken out of my routines, however jarring the interruption was. After all, there were more important things than the lecture on leadership models in women’s sports I was going to give in Rhode Island that spring. We all had to do our part to stop Covid. Of course, it wasn’t temporary. When I got into the elevator and went home from work that last day before lockdown, my life, like most people’s, changed forever. Now that we’re winding down a second year of pandemic, and bracing for yet another holiday amid yet another Covid surge, a new truth is sinking in. Our lives are not going to go back to the way they were. Instead, we’re left to grieve the lives we’ve lost — and continue to lose. [In today’s video](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TbaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMy9vcGluaW9uL2NvdmlkLXBhbmRlbWljLWdyaWVmLmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~), made with Kirby Ferguson and Emily Holzknecht, I propose a framework for doing just that. Most of us could use one right now. There are so many plans that got put on hold and then simply never happened. Years we’ll never get back. Sometimes it feels like the only thing that moved forward in the pandemic was time. The New York Times Of course, we’re grateful for what we still have. But the precious things we lost, even the little things, matter. And the idea that we should just move on with our lives — maybe the idea that there’s any closure to be had at all — is flawed. We can be grateful and grieve at the same time. [Watch the full video here.](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TbaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMy9vcGluaW9uL2NvdmlkLXBhbmRlbWljLWdyaWVmLmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Article Image](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TbaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMy9vcGluaW9uL2NvdmlkLXBhbmRlbWljLWdyaWVmLmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Grieving Our Old Normal How do we mourn everything we’ve lost to Covid? By Lindsay Crouse, Kirby Ferguson and Emily Holzknecht](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TbaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMy9vcGluaW9uL2NvdmlkLXBhbmRlbWljLWdyaWVmLmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Continue reading the main story](#a11y-skip-0) ADVERTISEMENT ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0RsaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9NTk3ODUmbGk9VFkmbT1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZwPVRZXzIwMjExMjIzVwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~ Here’s what we’re focusing on today: Editors’ Picks [And Now … Your End-of-the-Year Quiz Let’s see how much you remember. 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What if one side isn’t keeping up their end of the bargain? By Greg Bensinger](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TfaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMi9vcGluaW9uL3ViZXItc2FmZXR5LXJpZGUtc2hhcmluZy5odG1sP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTM5JmVtYz1lZGl0X3R5XzIwMjExMjIzJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTQ4NTUxJm5sPW9waW5pb24tdG9kYXkmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MiZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTc3NzYzJnRlPTEmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkN1cDbnl0Qgphu8xxxGFsceNTUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) [Article Image](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0TfaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMi9vcGluaW9uL3ViZXItc2FmZXR5LXJpZGUtc2hhcmluZy5odG1sP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTM5JmVtYz1lZGl0X3R5XzIwMjExMjIzJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTQ4NTUxJm5sPW9waW5pb24tdG9kYXkmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MiZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTc3NzYzJnRlPTEmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkN1cDbnl0Qgphu8xxxGFsceNTUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) [Jessica Grose Parenting in 2021? ‘Not Great, Bob!’ But we can still find ways to cackle with our kids. By Jessica Grose](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0ThaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMi9vcGluaW9uL3BhcmVudGluZy1jb3ZpZC12YWNjaW5hdGVkLmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Article Image](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRjpvbMP0ThaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAyMS8xMi8yMi9vcGluaW9uL3BhcmVudGluZy1jb3ZpZC12YWNjaW5hdGVkLmh0bWw_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9MzkmZW1jPWVkaXRfdHlfMjAyMTEyMjMmaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9NDg1NTEmbmw9b3Bpbmlvbi10b2RheSZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9Nzc3NjMmdGU9MSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3VwNueXRCCmG7zHHEYWxx41NSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Guest Essay Why Jesus Never Stopped Asking Questions Jesus liked to turn the tables on his interlocutors, especially those who were in the business of asking questions themselves. 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