Should I Tell the Children Why My Marriage Broke Up?

I had an affair. [View in browser](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QeAWh0dHBzOi8vbWVzc2FnaW5nLWN1c3RvbS1uZXdzbGV0dGVycy5ueXRpbWVzLmNvbS90ZW1wbGF0ZS9vYWt2Mj91cmk9bnl0Oi8vbmV3c2xldHRlci9iYzdmMDg3Zi01Zjg3LTQ5NmMtYmQ4ZC00MjNlMDU4NjIwZjAmdGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA)|[nytimes.com](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0S9aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0RtaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9MTYxOTY2JmxpPU1BJm09YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcD1NQV8yMDE5MTEwMlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ [The New York Times Magazine](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TNaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vc2VjdGlvbi9tYWdhemluZT90ZT0xJm5sPXRoZS1uZXcgeW9yayB0aW1lcyBtYWdhemluZSZlbWM9ZWRpdF9tYV8yMDE5MTEwMj9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD01MiZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD0xMzU3MCZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTE4NDY1JnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) November 2, 2019 [the ethicist Should I Tell the Children Why My Marriage Broke Up? The magazine’s Ethicist columnist on whether to tell your adult children about the affair that led to your divorce and more. by kwame anthony appiah](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QJAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMjkvbWFnYXppbmUvc2hvdWxkLWktdGVsbC10aGUtY2hpbGRyZW4td2h5LW15LW1hcnJpYWdlLWJyb2tlLXVwLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QJAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMjkvbWFnYXppbmUvc2hvdWxkLWktdGVsbC10aGUtY2hpbGRyZW4td2h5LW15LW1hcnJpYWdlLWJyb2tlLXVwLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) “I am a middle-aged woman. Several decades ago I had an affair with a woman I met in a writing class at a prestigious university’s continuing-education program. I was at a very fragile and vulnerable point in my life. My husband and I and our young children had recently moved to a new town where I knew no one. My children were both in school — I’d quit my job to raise a family — and I was lost, insecure, unhappy in my marriage and deeply depressed. The affair, was tumultuous and abusive — she had a Svengali-like hold over me. I can remember spending hours of my time, to all hours of the night, on the phone or instant messaging with her because she insisted she needed me and that if I hung up on her, she wasn’t sure what she would do to herself. She made up illnesses. She kept talking about suicide. She told me her fiancé had recently died. She insisted many other women were interested in her and she would move on if I couldn’t commit to her. She infiltrated my family life: buying expensive gifts for my children, dropping in on special events and much more. She also wheedled her way into my sibling’s good graces and began turning my sibling against my husband. She pushed me to seek a divorce; she told me my husband wasn’t good enough for me, that I deserved someone who would encourage my writing, encourage my independence and encourage me to be me. And I fell for it completely. ADVERTISEMENT ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0RtaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9MTYxOTYzJmxpPU1BJm09YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcD1NQV8yMDE5MTEwMlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0RtaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9NDMzNjgzJmxpPU1BJm09YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcD1NQV8yMDE5MTEwMlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0RtaHR0cHM6Ly9saXZlaW50ZW50Lm5ld3lvcmt0aW1lc2luZm8uY29tL2NsaWNrP3M9NTY0NzUzJmxpPU1BJm09YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcD1NQV8yMDE5MTEwMlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ Fast-forward a number of years: After many years of self-reflection and therapy, my husband and I got back together and ultimately remarried. Our relationship is different from before — more grown up and respectful, and I cherish what we have. I feel as though the experience happened to someone else in a very distant past. I still blame myself for what I allowed to happen to my life but now look back with a much better understanding of how depressed and vulnerable I was, and I’m able to cut myself some slack. My children are now wonderful, well-adjusted, successful adults. I have one nagging reminder of that dark period, however. We never told the children exactly why we divorced. Because they were so young, we were counseled to keep it as generic as possible, and we did. Should my husband and I come clean to the children?” [Read the Ethicist’s response here.](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QJAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMjkvbWFnYXppbmUvc2hvdWxkLWktdGVsbC10aGUtY2hpbGRyZW4td2h5LW15LW1hcnJpYWdlLWJyb2tlLXVwLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) OUR COVER STORY Plus features and longreads from this week’s Magazine ~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0T0aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vaW50ZXJhY3RpdmUvMjAxOS8xMC8zMS9tYWdhemluZS9pcmFxLW1lbnRhbC1oZWFsdGguaHRtbD90ZT0xJm5sPXRoZS1uZXcgeW9yayB0aW1lcyBtYWdhemluZSZlbWM9ZWRpdF9tYV8yMDE5MTEwMj9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD01MiZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD0xMzU3MCZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTE4NDY1JnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~ [Article Image] Adam Ferguson for The New York Times  [How Does the Human Soul Survive Atrocity? 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It’s proof that chocolate has the power to heal. by dorie greenspan](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TyaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMC9tYWdhemluZS9jaG9jb2xhdGUtY2FrZS1saXNib24tcmVjaXBlLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TyaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMC9tYWdhemluZS9jaG9jb2xhdGUtY2FrZS1saXNib24tcmVjaXBlLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [screenland ‘Succession’ Knows How to Toy with Your Class Rage. Hence the Chicken. The HBO show draws drama and comedy from the plutocrats who order so much of American life. But it’s just as deft at manipulating its viewers’ feelings. by michelle dean](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TwaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMC9tYWdhemluZS9zdWNjZXNzaW9uLWhiby10b20tY2hpY2tlbi5odG1sP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TwaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMC9tYWdhemluZS9zdWNjZXNzaW9uLWhiby10b20tY2hpY2tlbi5odG1sP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [letter of recommendation Letter of Recommendation: Show Caves Want to encounter the sublime beneath the surface of the earth? That’ll be $21.95. by will stephenson](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0T5aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8yOS9tYWdhemluZS9sZXR0ZXItb2YtcmVjb21tZW5kYXRpb24tc2hvdy1jYXZlcy5odG1sP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0T5aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8yOS9tYWdhemluZS9sZXR0ZXItb2YtcmVjb21tZW5kYXRpb24tc2hvdy1jYXZlcy5odG1sP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [diagnosis Why Did the Young Mother Have Searing Head Pain and a Racing Heart? The obvious cardiac tests revealed nothing. It wasn’t until one doctor thought creatively that the culprit was found. by lisa sanders, m.d.](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QYAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMzAvbWFnYXppbmUvd2h5LWRpZC10aGUteW91bmctbW90aGVyLWhhdmUtc2VhcmluZy1oZWFkLXBhaW4tYW5kLWEtcmFjaW5nLWhlYXJ0Lmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QYAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMzAvbWFnYXppbmUvd2h5LWRpZC10aGUteW91bmctbW90aGVyLWhhdmUtc2VhcmluZy1oZWFkLXBhaW4tYW5kLWEtcmFjaW5nLWhlYXJ0Lmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [tip How to Build a Moat Anticipate sedimentation. Keep the water fresh. Cut any trees by the edge yearly. by malia wollan](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TpaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMS9tYWdhemluZS9ob3ctdG8tYnVpbGQtYS1tb2F0Lmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TpaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMS9tYWdhemluZS9ob3ctdG8tYnVpbGQtYS1tb2F0Lmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Judge John Hodgman on Eating Unpeeled Eggs The shells might be a good source of calcium, but does that make it O.K.? by john hodgman](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QAAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMzEvbWFnYXppbmUvanVkZ2Utam9obi1ob2RnbWFuLW9uLWVhdGluZy11bnBlZWxlZC1lZ2dzLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QAAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMzEvbWFnYXppbmUvanVkZ2Utam9obi1ob2RnbWFuLW9uLWVhdGluZy11bnBlZWxlZC1lZ2dzLmh0bWw_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA) [Do You Have a Living Relative Who Served in World War II? Help Us Tell Their Story If a relative or friend of yours served, help us get in touch with them. Or, if you served during World War II, tell us about your experience directly.](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TqaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMS9tYWdhemluZS93b3JsZC13YXItaWktcmVhZGVycy5odG1sP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0TqaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cubnl0aW1lcy5jb20vMjAxOS8xMC8zMS9tYWdhemluZS93b3JsZC13YXItaWktcmVhZGVycy5odG1sP3RlPTEmbmw9dGhlLW5ldyB5b3JrIHRpbWVzIG1hZ2F6aW5lJmVtYz1lZGl0X21hXzIwMTkxMTAyP2NhbXBhaWduX2lkPTUyJmluc3RhbmNlX2lkPTEzNTcwJnNlZ21lbnRfaWQ9MTg0NjUmdXNlcl9pZD1hYTQ5MWVmN2YxZDk2NGU0OTc5ZmI3ODRlNzRlMDFkNyZyZWdpX2lkPTc3Njc0OTUyVwNueXRCCgAnRWm9XSB2ewJSG3RyaXN0cmFtYmFsZHdpbjkwQGdtYWlsLmNvbVgEAAAAAA~~) [Poem: Remembering the Night I Dreamed Paul Klee Married the Sky A painter who loved mystical colors blurring, earth to sky, might have liked a vividly descriptive poem which holds a long-ago moment as a hinge for everything to come. by jack ridl and naomi shihab nye](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QUAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMzEvbWFnYXppbmUvcG9lbS1yZW1lbWJlcmluZy10aGUtbmlnaHQtaS1kcmVhbWVkLXBhdWwta2xlZS1tYXJyaWVkLXRoZS1za3kuaHRtbD90ZT0xJm5sPXRoZS1uZXcgeW9yayB0aW1lcyBtYWdhemluZSZlbWM9ZWRpdF9tYV8yMDE5MTEwMj9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD01MiZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD0xMzU3MCZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTE4NDY1JnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) [Article Thumbnail](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP4QUAWh0dHBzOi8vd3d3Lm55dGltZXMuY29tLzIwMTkvMTAvMzEvbWFnYXppbmUvcG9lbS1yZW1lbWJlcmluZy10aGUtbmlnaHQtaS1kcmVhbWVkLXBhdWwta2xlZS1tYXJyaWVkLXRoZS1za3kuaHRtbD90ZT0xJm5sPXRoZS1uZXcgeW9yayB0aW1lcyBtYWdhemluZSZlbWM9ZWRpdF9tYV8yMDE5MTEwMj9jYW1wYWlnbl9pZD01MiZpbnN0YW5jZV9pZD0xMzU3MCZzZWdtZW50X2lkPTE4NDY1JnVzZXJfaWQ9YWE0OTFlZjdmMWQ5NjRlNDk3OWZiNzg0ZTc0ZTAxZDcmcmVnaV9pZD03NzY3NDk1MlcDbnl0QgoAJ0VpvV0gdnsCUht0cmlzdHJhbWJhbGR3aW45MEBnbWFpbC5jb21YBAAAAAA~) Stay in touch: Follow us on Twitter ([@NYTmag](~/AAAAAQA~/RgRfn-5FP0S_aHR0cHM6Ly90d2l0dGVyLmNvbS9ueXRtYWc_dGU9MSZubD10aGUtbmV3IHlvcmsgdGltZXMgbWFnYXppbmUmZW1jPWVkaXRfbWFfMjAxOTExMDI_Y2FtcGFpZ25faWQ9NTImaW5zdGFuY2VfaWQ9MTM1NzAmc2VnbWVudF9pZD0xODQ2NSZ1c2VyX2lkPWFhNDkxZWY3ZjFkOTY0ZTQ5NzlmYjc4NGU3NGUwMWQ3JnJlZ2lfaWQ9Nzc2NzQ5NTJXA255dEIKACdFab1dIHZ7AlIbdHJpc3RyYW1iYWxkd2luOTBAZ21haWwuY29tWAQAAAAA)). 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