On Politics With Lisa Lerer: How to Survive Thanksgiving

Tips for keeping the peace around the dinner table; plus, great moments in presidential Thanksgiving history. [Trouble seeing this email? View in browser]( [The New York Times]( [The New York Times]( November 20, 2018 | Evening Edition [Lisa Lerer] Hi. Welcome to On Politics, your guide to the day in national politics. I’m Lisa Lerer, your host. Getty Images Thanksgiving and politics. Oy. Yes, politics has always been intertwined with the most quintessentially American holiday — just ask those turkeys the [presidents pardon every year](. But in the Trump era, there’s growing evidence that partisanship is having a serious impact on our Thanksgiving Day festivities (see: [yesterday’s newsletter](. A majority of adults say they “dread the thought of having to talk about politics at Thanksgiving dinner,” according to a poll conducted last year by [PBS NewsHour, NPR and Marist](. A [study published]( in June found that celebrations were about 30 to 50 minutes shorter for Americans who crossed partisan lines for the holiday than for those who traveled to areas that voted like their own. The impacts were worse in battleground districts: Every 1,000 political ads aired in a specific area correlated to 2.6 minutes off the length of Thanksgiving dinner. That added up to 34 million hours of lost cross-partisan discourse in 2016, according to the study’s authors, [who analyzed location information]( from more than 10 million smartphones and voting results from more than 172,000 precincts nationwide. The internet [is full of survival guides]( for talking politics at the Thanksgiving table, and we’ve collected some of the best tips here. Now you can keep your holiday debates focused on the real issues, like [to brine, or not to brine]( Don’t mention President Trump A [SurveyMonkey audience poll]( conducted last year found that Mr. Trump was the biggest culprit in hijacking Thanksgiving dinner, with 37 percent of respondents saying mention of the president was most likely to start an argument. ADVERTISEMENT The feeling cut across party lines, with Mr. Trump the most common answer among self-identified Democrats, Republicans and independents. (If you’re wondering: In 2014, 11 percent of Americans indicated that President Barack Obama was most likely to spur an argument.) Focus on the food That’s part of how the Supreme Court justices help keep comity, according to Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Sonia Sotomayor. The justices host [a steady stream]( of elaborate birthday lunches, retirement dinners and weekend bagel spreads. “We can’t talk about cases,” [said]( Justice Sotomayor. “That’s our absolute rule.” There’s a long tradition of shared meals at the court: During the early years, the justices took nearly all their meals together in a shared boardinghouse. “When the boardinghouse style disappeared,” [said]( Justice Ginsburg, “dissent began to appear.” Lay down the law [Some basic ground rules]( can help make everyone feel comfortable during the holiday. What do those look like? Well, maybe designate the living room as a “politics zone.” Or place certain topics off-limits. Hosts can play a big role in this process: Considering starting the night with a toast to civility, and arrange seats at the dinner table strategically. Forget about winning We know, it’s not that you want to win, it’s just, how could your mother/uncle/second cousin be so delusional! Wrong attitude. The key to successful conversations, according to [a guide]( created by the founders of the Women’s March, is open-ended questions, no judgment, respect, and a balance of talking and listening. Basically, be kind. Remember: These people are (supposedly) your “loved ones.” If you’re really worried, you can [practice good argument techniques]( with Uncle Angry Bot, a tool developed by the former psychiatrist Karin Tamerius, the founder of Smart Politics, a liberal nonprofit advocating the use of “radical civility.” But if that feels impossible … Go cute or go home Our advice? Find the cutest thing in the room and hone in. Be it the grandchildren or the dog, nothing builds group morale more than something adorable. Of course, editor Tom and I have the CUTEST CHILDREN IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. (What can we say? We’re very lucky.) So this is an easy strategy for us. For those of you without children, just pull up a YouTube of “[baby laughing at ripping paper]( Trust us on this one. ____________________ We’re taking off the rest of this week to eat turkey, burrow into our couches and avoid arguments about politics. When we return next week, we’ll be on a reduced schedule — with the midterms over, we figured we could all stand to slow down for a bit. What are we thankful for? Finally realizing that those Black Friday [deals are mostly duds](. And, of course, all of you. Thanks, as always, for reading. Best wishes for a lovely, lazy Thanksgiving! ____________________ A recount in Georgia An update on an undecided House race in Georgia, from our colleague Alan Blinder: Florida’s statewide recounts [are finished](. Georgia’s governor’s race came to [an acrimonious end](. But the South is not done counting votes. In fact, Georgia is set to start counting again on Wednesday, when elections officials are expected to pore over about 280,000 ballots in the Seventh Congressional District race. Representative Rob Woodall, a four-term Republican, leads the Democratic nominee, Carolyn Bourdeaux, by 419 votes. “Part of this is making sure that we really have a fair and transparent election process,” Ms. Bourdeaux said on Tuesday, echoing the recent message of other Georgia Democrats. “It goes beyond my own race.” Mr. Woodall’s campaign said it had anticipated a recount, which is allowed under Georgia law because of the narrow margin, “so this next phase does not come as a surprise and certainly is not alarming.” Atlanta’s diversifying suburbs, which Republicans dominated not long ago, were hospitable to Democrats this year. The House seat in the neighboring Sixth District — once held by Newt Gingrich — fell to the Democratic candidate Lucy McBath, and Stacey Abrams, the Democratic nominee for governor, carried the counties that immediately ring Atlanta. ____________________ Happy Turkey Day, Mr. President Presidents have always shared a connection to Thanksgiving. George Washington [proclaimed the first national day of Thanksgiving]( in 1789, and Abraham Lincoln made it official in 1863, when he declared [the last Thursday in November]( to be “a day of thanksgiving and praise.” Here are a few other notable moments in presidential Thanksgiving history: “Franksgiving” In 1939, President Franklin D. Roosevelt [moved the holiday to the second-to-last Thursday]( in November, giving in to pressure from retailers worried about Christmas shopping. The public was furious. The Nov. 23 holiday became known as “Franksgiving.” And when Roosevelt did it again the next year, [The New York Times reported]( 16 states chose to celebrate it on Nov. 28 instead. In 1941, Congress passed a law declaring Thanksgiving to be on the fourth Thursday of every November. The first pardon The National Turkey Federation started donating two turkeys to the White House annually in 1947. Until President Ronald Reagan, most presidents chose the sensible option of simply eating the birds. (Though President John F. Kennedy sent one of his turkeys [back to the farm]( grousing that it wasn’t yet big enough.) The first turkey pardon didn’t come until 1987, when Mr. Reagan granted clemency as a joke to [deflect questions from reporters]( asking about the Iran-contra scandal. His successor, President George H.W. Bush, made it an annual event in 1989. If you’re curious, the last few pardoned turkeys have been[living out their years]( at Gobbler’s Rest, part of Virginia Tech’s College of Agriculture and Life Sciences. Kill, baby, kill Weeks after losing the 2008 election, Sarah Palin returned to Alaska, where she was still governor, to pardon some turkeys at a local farm. But as Ms. Palin answered questions about her campaign and governorship in a [television interview]( a farmer began casually killing some birds behind her — well within view of the camera. “This was neat,” said Ms. Palin, over the sound of turkeys being led to slaughter. “You need a little levity in this job.” Hunger games, poultry edition In 2013, the White House held a public vote to see which bird — Popcorn or Caramel— would be spared the slaughter. #TeamPopcorn won, but #TeamCaramel [was also granted clemency](. Popcorn [died less than a year later,]( Caramel survived. The reason: He lost weight. Something to think about when you dig in on Thursday. ____________________ What to read tonight • President Trump defied his intelligence agencies, and ample evidence, to [declare his loyalty to Saudi Arabia over the killing of Jamal Khashoggi](. • The stock market’s gains for 2018 were [erased in early trading today](. Five tech companies alone have [lost $845 billion in market value]( since the end of August. • A writer at the website Thrillist declared a local burger joint in Portland the best in the country. [It killed the restaurant.]( ____________________ … Seriously Hot Cheetos turkey has [exploded]( [the]( [i](. I’d eat it. Admit it, you’d try it too. Don’t you love America? _____________________ Credits for the turkey pardon photos, from top to bottom: Jonathan Ernst/Reuters, Alex Wong/Getty Images, Mark Wilson/Getty Images, Tim Sloan/AFP Were you forwarded this newsletter? [Subscribe here to get it delivered to your inbox.]( Thanks for reading. Politics is more than what goes on inside the White House. On Politics brings you the people, issues and ideas reshaping our world. Is there anything you think we’re missing? Anything you want to see more of? We’d love to hear from you. Email us at [onpolitics@nytimes.com](mailto:onpolitics@nytimes.com?te=1&nl=politics&emc=edit_cn_2018112020181120). ADVERTISEMENT FOLLOW NYTimes [Facebook] [FACEBOOK]( [Twitter] [@nytimes]( Get more [NYTimes.com newsletters »]( | Get unlimited access to NYTimes.com and our NYTimes apps. [Subscribe »]( ABOUT THIS EMAIL You received this message because you signed up for NYTimes.com's Politics newsletter. [Unsubscribe]( | [Manage Subscriptions]( | [Change Your Email]( | [Privacy Policy]( | [Contact]( | [Advertise]( Copyright 2018 The New York Times Company | 620 Eighth Avenue New York, NY 10018