Your NewsThump Daily Briefing for Mon, 23 Oct

This is your daily summary of the topical jokes and stories on NewsThump.com [View this email in your browser]( [NewsThump Daily Briefing Header]( Hello from NewsThump! Thank you for signing up to the NewsThump Daily Briefing! Below you will find the top stories on our site for today Mon, 23 Oct. We hope you enjoy them! Don't forget, you can read everything we do completely free from ads, get exclusive access to subscriber-only pieces, AND support NewsThump, all for the price of a single coffee a month. Click below to learn more! [SUPPORT NEWSTHUMP AND GET EVERYTHING AD-FREE!]( [GB News is not a ‘news channel’, but a ‘fatuous entertainment channel for dimwitted imbeciles’ confirms Ofcom]( [Jacob Rees-Mogg on GB News] Broadcasting regulator Ofcom has insisted that GB News has not breached the regulations that forbid sitting MPs from presenting news programmes, after insisting that no one in their right mind considers GB News a place where you can become genuinely better informed about current affairs. [Read more »]( [‘Don’t tell your father-in-law you own a Porsche’ – Gordon Ramsay’s top tips for borrowing money from your relatives]( [Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen] Gordon Ramsay is one of the most successful restauranteurs on the planet, and is reportedly worth over $50m, but this was wasn't always the case. There was a time when he had to pretend to be poor in order to borrow money from his relatives. Here he reveals his secrets for extracting cash from your own relatives. [Read more »]( [Hubble space telescope observes distant start of Rugby World Cup]( [Rugby World Cup] There were scenes of celebration and awe today after the powerful Hubble Space Telescope was used by astronomers to go back to the distant past and observe the start of the Rugby World Cup. [Read more »]( [Ungrateful toddler refuses to accept generous offer of weekend lie-in]( [Toddler standing in his cot refusing to sleep] Two-year-old Jake Williams has steadfastly refused to accept his parent's generous offer of a lie-in this morning, instead insisting to get up at 6:15 am like usual. [Read more »]( [Weather now so bad even Audi drivers obeying the speed limit]( [Audi driving in the rain] Weather across Britain has been so bad over the last 24 hours that even Audi drivers are only doing 70 on the motorway, according to reports. [Read more »]( [SUPPORT NEWSTHUMP AND GET EVERYTHING AD-FREE!]( Copyright © 2023 Thump Publishing Limited, All rights reserved. You are receiving this email because you asked us to send you a daily summary of NewsThump's headlines. A wise choice, may we add. Our mailing address is: Thump Publishing Limited 40 Caversham RoadReading, Berkshire RG1 7BT United Kingdom [Add us to your address book]( Want to change how you receive these emails? You can [update your preferences]( or [unsubscribe from this list](. [Mailchimp Email Marketing](