Your NewsThump Daily Briefing for Mon, 26 Jun

This is your daily summary of the topical jokes and stories on NewsThump.com [View this email in your browser]( [NewsThump Daily Briefing Header]( Hello from NewsThump! Thank you for signing up to the NewsThump Daily Briefing! Below you will find the top stories on our site for today Mon, 26 Jun. We hope you enjoy them! Don't forget, you can read everything we do completely free from ads, get exclusive access to subscriber-only pieces, AND support NewsThump, all for the price of a single coffee a month. Click below to learn more! [SUPPORT NEWSTHUMP AND GET EVERYTHING AD-FREE!]( [Boy caught trying Dad’s e-cigarette forced to vape entire cartridge]( [Adult vaping] 14-year-old Jake Williams has been forced to vape the entire cartridge after his father caught him trying his e-cigarette. [Read more »]( [Prince William to end homelessness by letting homeless people sleep in a few of his dad’s houses]( [Buckingham palace] Prince William has vowed to end homelessness in the UK, by allowing all the homeless people to sleep in a few of his dad’s massive houses. [Read more »]( [Straightforward work question turns into epic email trail involving seventeen people AGAIN]( [woman staring at emails on her laptop] A seemingly simple work question has taken up half of a company's resources. [Read more »]( [‘The water might have gone cold’ insists man re-boiling kettle after 15 seconds spent looking for a cup]( [Someone switching on the kettle] A man has insisted today that he needed to re-boil his kettle, just 15 seconds after boiling it whilst he was getting a cup out, because the water might have gone too cold for his tea. [Read more »]( [Lifelong Churnups fan fuming as Foo Fighters steal Glastonbury headline slot]( [Glastonbury] A lifelong Churnups fan has returned from Glastonbury absolutely fuming after American Rockers The Foo Fighter appeared on stage instead of them and STOLE their headlining slot at Glastonbury. [Read more »]( [WOKE BULLETIN: Crunchies, Belgium and Mauve are now woke]( [Unhappy man learning what new things are woke today] Today’s Woke Bulletin has revealed that Crunchies, Belgium and Mauve are all now considered woke. [Read more »]( [Cool side of the pillow also hot]( [Man sleeping with his head in the fridge] A state of emergency was declared in bed last night when it was discovered that the cool side of the pillow was also hot. [Read more »]( [REVEALED! The vile TikTok trend where gullible tabloid pundits are cruelly tricked into believing teens identify as cats!]( [Teenager using a phone] In a world-first, NewsThump has lifted the lid on the immoral social media fad where heartless teenagers compete with each other at goading right-wing simpletons into outrage over clearly fake stories about schools providing litter boxes for furries. [Read more »]( [Steven Seagal to sort this out any minute now]( Rough, tough man of action Steven Seagal is expected to take up arms to put a stop to all this nonsense in Russia any second now, it has emerged. [Read more »]( [Biden offers to evacuate Putin from Moscow]( Facing the terrible threat of a Russian army barrelling down the main highway towards his capital, Joe Biden has offered to airlift Vladimir Putin to safety this morning. [Read more »]( [SUPPORT NEWSTHUMP AND GET EVERYTHING AD-FREE!]( Copyright © 2023 Thump Publishing Limited, All rights reserved. You are receiving this email because you asked us to send you a daily summary of NewsThump's headlines. A wise choice, may we add. Our mailing address is: Thump Publishing Limited 40 Caversham RoadReading, Berkshire RG1 7BT United Kingdom [Add us to your address book]( Want to change how you receive these emails? You can [update your preferences]( or [unsubscribe from this list](. [Mailchimp Email Marketing](