Newsletter Tuesday, January 03, 2017

[LaineyGossip.com - Calling all smuthounds!] Tuesday, January 03, 2017 [Intro for January 3, 2017] [Ben Affleck] Dear Gossips, Happy New Year! Hope your holiday was restful. Because we are right back into it. Golden Globes on Sunday. Awards every weekend. And Hollywood divorce court all month too. Ready? Ben Affleck’s Live By Night opened in limited release at Christmas but will go wide a week Friday. The reviews for the film haven’t been great. Many top critics commented that there are moments of brilliance in Live By Night but that all the pieces don’t quite fit together. For Manohla Dargis though, who reviewed the film [for the New York Times], the problem with Live By Night comes back to Ben himself: “Mr. Affleck handles the busy narrative without finding its hook, but his biggest problem is that he’s fallen for his leading man. He gave himself a good role in “Argo,” one of the earlier movies he directed (in the first, “Gone Baby Gone,” he stayed off camera). But in “Argo,” he was also embedded in that movie’s enjoyably loony complications and upstaged by a couple of world-class scene-stealers in Alan Arkin and John Goodman. In “Live by Night,” by contrast, Mr. Affleck grabs the center and doesn’t let go, partly, it seems, because he’s invested in being a movie star. (Certainly that’s the only rational explanation for “Batman v Superman,” other than the paycheck.)” Exactly. Always. Ben Affleck is 100% “invested in being a movie star”. As most of them are. He’s by far not the only one. And he is certainly not the worst one, by far. Ben’s problem, however, also not unique to him, has always been that push-pull between knowing, deep down, that he’s a movie star, and that he is one because he WANTED to be one, and being embarrassed to have wanted to be one in the first place. It’s always been fascinating to me the alternative truths celebrities train themselves to believe so that they can get farther and farther away from having to admit that celebrity is what they sought in the beginning. In a new interview with [The Guardian] to promote Live By Night, Ben is asked about politics, and whether or not he’s ever considered getting into it: “But I really wouldn’t want to,” he says. “It’s not because I think being a public servant wouldn’t be satisfying, but it’s become a pure money-raising exercise from beginning to end. It’s small talk with people who you want to squeeze money out of. It’s sleazy. You have to have a certain tolerance to that kind of schmooze that I don’t have.” Umm… you work in Hollywood. Sleazing and schmoozing are behavioural requirements, that’s basically how every movie gets made. So never mind tolerating it, he f-cking lives it. It’s the ones who are successful in Hollywood though who have the luxury of revising what it took to become that way. Speaking nostalgically in The Guardian, Ben reflects on what it was like before he made it in the business: “It was me, Matt, my brother Casey and a bunch of friends from Boston – all of them were trying to make it in some capacity or other. It was a time to experiment, to go to auditions and try stuff. And part of what we revelled in was the absurd level of frustration that we went through and the ridiculous hoops we had to jump through. Those years were wonderful – they were great, formative, blissful, fun, free years.” Wonderful, sure. But only if they lead somewhere, non? Otherwise it’s a waste. Otherwise it’s a broken promise. Have you seen La La Land yet? La La Land is about two artists at the beginning. About all the rejection at the beginning. And, mostly, in my interpretation of it, and Sarah’s too, when she [reviewed the film at TIFF], it’s about the cost of a dream. For one dream to be fulfilled, other dreams must die. The idea of the dream also happens to be the Live By Night tagline: “the American dream comes at a price”. The Hollywood dream comes at a price too. Ben describes how he’s paid it: “Absolutely. I’ve been lucky. I’ve had my wildest dreams come true, but the price is the Faustian exchange you make where your identity is not your own. You become a public figure and it changes all the rules. The press can become invasive and dishonest, and you have to put up with inconvenient stuff like that. I’m at peace with paying my own price, what I’m not at peace with is when it invades on my kids’ space and time. They didn’t make any bargains. I try to shelter them as best I can. That’s my only real gripe.” It’s one way of looking at it. The other way of looking at it, arguably more sincerely, is how La La Land presents the “Faustian exchange”. It’s not so much that dreams are taken away from you by the press, it’s the dreams that stardom forces you to choose between. You can’t have all the dreams, especially when those dreams are so big. So, which one do you want more? And in making that decision, can you live with the choice? Yours in gossip, Lainey [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 1:08 PM [World War Brange 2017] [Angelina Jolie is spotted out getting ice cream with her kids Shiloh and Knox in Crested Butte, Colorado on January 2, 2016] [Angelina Jolie] and the children were in Crested Butte, Colorado for NYE. Here she is with Shiloh and Knox out for ice cream. [The Daily Mail] has other photos of her with Vivienne and in some of the shots you can see that Mariane Pearl is with them. Mariane Pearl is a journalist and the widow of the late Daniel Pearl. Angelina Jolie played her in A Mighty Heart. Mariane wrote about their friendship for [Glamour Magazine] in 2014. So they’re on holiday together. And obviously they are still close. These are the first good quality paparazzi images of Angelina since she and [Brad Pitt] broke up. And it’s not like the paps hang out regularly in Crested Butte, Colorado. At least 3 different agencies were able to get photos of Angelina with her children though. Which, as we know, with Angelina, there’s more often than not a plan behind the picture. I wonder if it’s kind of a f-ck you. Because for weeks now Brad Pitt’s sources have been leaking to the entertainment outlets about how sadface he is because that bitch he married won’t let him see the kids – and that’s not even subtext, it’s about as obvi-text as possible. What he’s doing is crying at the ocean, the way Jennifer Aniston used to get papped looking out onto the ocean after their divorce, searching for answers in the waves, going to the “[water’s edge and scream(ing)]”. God that Vanity Fair article gave us some great quotes, didn’t it? “Billy Idol called – he wants his look back” is another one. And now here we are, [Brad in the pity party] Jennifer Aniston role, making sure that we know, that the world knows, that he is lonely and miserable. Meanwhile his estranged wife looks super cute in ski gear, catching snowflakes on her eyelashes, surrounded by their happy, smiling kids. Strategically sound, or will it be a mistake? Brad worked over the MiniVan Majority pretty good at the end of last year with all kinds of sympathy coming his way from people feeling sorry for him because he’s handsome and successful, with excuse after excuse put forward to account for whatever it is that happened on the plane and the fact that he can’t be alone with his kids, a “victim” of the beautiful, ambitious, calculating woman he married. Poor Brad didn’t see his kids for his birthday and only met with them briefly for a gift exchange at Christmas, and now, look at her, look at her flaunting her holiday with them like this, deliberately making him feel even worse. C-nt! At least that’s Team Brad hopes you’ll take it. And on her team, well, her team would prefer you’ll see these pictures, see that she’s the one who’s the constant in the kids’ lives, and the one who’s been bringing them as much happiness as possible during a tumultuous time. You picking a side? Brange are due again in court later this month to fight some more over their divorce documents. It’ll happen just before Chinese New Year. Interestingly enough, at least to me, both of them were born the sign of the Rabbit. I’ll do full sign analyses in the days preceding Chinese New Year per tradition on this site but my ma, the Chinese Squawking Chicken, has already done the reading for Rabbits (Jacek is a Rabbit) and Rabbits are in for a rough one this coming year, the Year of the Rooster. It’s in both their best interests to avoid confrontation and minimise risk. How’s that gonna work? [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 8:45 PM [Smutty Social Media, January 3, 2017] [Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus on Instagram] This morning Lainey posted about [Leo’s New Year] – I was curious about how he spent his holiday, because a good portion of the Wolf Pack was in Las Vegas at Marquee and they are loath to be apart, particularly on big party nights like NYE and Halloween. Kevin Connolly did the Escalator Challenge. [I learned a lot from YouTube in 2016!!!! Happy New Years #2017 #escalatorchallenge... great cinematography @donatiennela] A video posted by Kevin Connolly (@mrkevinconnolly) on Jan 1, 2017 at 2:19pm PST Did you know Morgan Freeman and Ashley Judd have done 5 movies together? That’s a DVD box set worth. [My friend.] A photo posted by Ashley Judd (@ashley_judd) on Dec 29, 2016 at 9:02pm PST This piece snuck in as one of my favourite reads of 2016. “[You know how long Denzel needs to get into a role? Sh-t the fuck up, that’s how long.]” [Happy Birthday to the tremendous artist and human spirit, #DenzelWashington!] A photo posted by Viola Davis (@violadavis) on Dec 28, 2016 at 1:47pm PST Miley and Liam were inseparable over the holidays, and very demonstrative about it. Which made me think of Dora, the dog that brought them back together. They clearly adore her. I know they say a baby can’t save a marriage, but can a new dog save an engagement? [Thinking about how lucky we are to spend Doras first Xmas together as a fam! Our big and beautiful rescue! What a perfect holiday present for your family to ADOPT & SAVE a life! Think about it! If you go for it send me pictures you know I am obsessed with animals! Obvi! #adoptdontshop] A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on Dec 25, 2016 at 4:41pm PST The Russell/Hawn/Hudson family adopted Chelsea Handler for the holidays. [I want to thank Kurt and mama Goldie for treating my like an orphan who found my forever home. They create so much love and joy in their home and I feel it every time I'm with that very special family. #funtimes] A photo posted by Chelsea Handler (@chelseahandler) on Jan 1, 2017 at 5:57pm PST I am very interested in where celebs spend New Year’s Eve, because they can go anywhere in the world. Katy and Orlando went to Tokyo – that would be in my top 3. [🇯🇵] A photo posted by orlandobloom (@orlandobloom) on Jan 2, 2017 at 2:36am PST Sam and Aaron Taylor-Johnson went to Tahoe. [A photo posted by Artist & Director (@samtaylorjohnson)] on Jan 2, 2017 at 9:30am PST Karlie Kloss was on a yacht with Derek Blasberg and, who else?, Wendi Deng. With a cameo by Paul McCartney. [Happy New Year from me and Paul and Jimmy and @karliekloss] A video posted by Derek Blasberg (@derekblasberg) on Jan 1, 2017 at 6:35am PST Half of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants were together at midnight (they later FaceTimed with America). [Hi, 2017.] A photo posted by Amber Tamblyn (@amberrosetamblyn) on Dec 31, 2016 at 9:15pm PST Bella Hadid spent the night with Kendall Jenner and Hailey {NAME}, strengthening the anti-squad Squad. Will the Hadid sisters be divided by an Insta-model civil war in 2017? Taylor won’t be on the front lines – she’s more of a strategist. [I🖤U HNY!!!!!🥂] A photo posted by Bella Hadid (@bellahadid) on Jan 1, 2017 at 10:52pm PST The state of the movie star 2017: How is this the best cover they could come up with for Chris Pratt? He is charming and lovable and handsome, the Golden Retriever of men. This looks like a catalogue shot. [Cover star @prattprattpratt has come a long way from living in a van in Hawaii. Read VF’s latest cover story at the link in bio. Photograph by @MarkSeliger for V.F. February 2017.] A photo posted by Vanity Fair (@vanityfair) on Jan 3, 2017 at 9:03am PST [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 6:52 PM [Lopizzy at the casino] [Drake and JLo] If you weren’t keeping up on gossip during the holidays (how DARE you?), here’s why [I call them Lopizzy]. As expected, Lopizzy celebrated New Year’s Eve in Vegas where [Drake] was paid to perform at Hakkasan. [JLO] was supposed to get paid to perform in Miami but she cancelled the gig a couple of weeks ago citing the desire to spend time with her family and friends. Boys over paper? Or future paper? A lot of people don’t think Lopizzy is legit. And that [the prom last week] was more about promoting their upcoming single and the music video than it is about an actual romance. Sure. Fine. But Bruno Mars has a question for you: why you mad? Fix ya face. Like, would you rather this not be happening at all? If this wasn’t happening, we couldn’t talk about Vegas. And how she was wearing a necklace that might be his necklace. [#GoodTimes #GreatMemories #TheHomeTeam #HappyNewYears #Vegas] A photo posted by Jessy Terrero Director (@jessyterrero) on Jan 1, 2017 at 2:57am PST [The Graham's on the gram @tharealroyalty @therealdennisg @futuretheprince #UncleChris] A photo posted by champagnepapi (@champagnepapi) on Dec 23, 2016 at 8:34pm PST And also how they hit the tables together. [#Jlo] and [#Drake] Hit Gambling Tables TOGETHER in Vegas (PHOTO) [ — TMZ (@TMZ) [January 3, 2017] JLO. Gambling. New Year’s Eve. Use your gossip memory… what’s the association? It was the end of 2003, [the beginning of 2004]. Not Lopizzy but Bennifer. In Vegas. They’d called off the engagement but not the relationship. And he was playing poker. And her face, remember her face? Sitting next to him? That was the true end. 13 years later, JLO’s the one at the tables. Drake is the accessory. And both of them have that same expression she was wearing back in Bennifer. Also, her ma is there, standing beside Drake. So he’s hanging with her family too. So we have intrigue, a throwback, some nostalgia, family associations… again, why you complaining? [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 6:01 PM [The “unknowable” Natalie Portman] [Natalie Portman speaks onstage at the 28th Annual Palm Springs International Film Festival Film Awards Gala at the Palm Springs Convention Center on January 2, 2017 in Palm Springs, California] In November Sarah wrote [about Natalie Portman’s Oscar chances], noting that Natalie does indeed give a strong performance in Jackie and that, no doubt, Natalie knows how to campaign for an Oscar, but that the biggest obstacle to her getting another one this year is that she just won one not too many years ago. At the time it was reassuring to me. Because I’m still trying to recover from last time and all the eyerolls she brought to that award season. And yet… it’s [Natalie Portman]. Which is why once a week, at least, I keep texting Sarah, like the Queen in Snow White before the mirror. “Are you sure, Sarah? Are you sure she won’t win?” The answer was always the same, until about 2 weeks ago, when Sarah answered back that she’d actually been speaking with male members of the Academy and… well… they might be voting for Natalie Portman. Just before the holidays, on our [Show Your Work podcast], Duana and I talked about Natalie Portman and what it is that makes her so intolerable – it was always so for Duana and I only came around to it later, after that Oscar run, when she dedicated one of her awards to Benjamin Millepied for putting a baby into her. The peg for the discussion was a piece at [MTV.com] by Teo Bugbee about how Natalie Portman will never grow up, how “her powers as a performer are never greater than when she’s playing a oddly sexualized, childlike grown-up”. And that kind of performance appeals to a certain kind of man, non? Many of those men are old ass white Oscar voters who live in Palm Springs. They worship a specific femininity. A nostalgic femininity. The femininity of Jackie Kennedy. In Jackie, Natalie Portman plays an icon who used all her skills to establish and protect her husband’s legacy. Think about all the erections a tribute performance like that might inspire in those men. And then, and then, their favourite actor, [Tom Hanks], gets up on stage at the Palm Springs International Film Festival, receives the only standing ovation of the evening… Only standing ovation of the nite goes to [@tomhanks] [#psiff] [pic.twitter.com/CoEc7i24tC] — Marc Malkin (@marcmalkin) [January 3, 2017] …and delivers an introduction for Natalie that does the work of 15 screenings and Q&As and red carpet appearances. He calls her “unknowable” but “authentic”, he reminds the audience that she went to Harvard and wrote research papers, he pretty much calls her a genius who isn’t too good for Sesame Street and The Simpsons. It is the most powerful endorsement we’ve seen all season, maybe over the last few seasons. Watch here, starting at 1:49. Remember, Tom Hanks is a member of the Academy’s Board of Governors. Needless to say, Natalie Portman’s Oscar nomination is a done deal, a lock. And even though Emma Stone’s been the presumed frontrunner since Venice, if the Oscars were this weekend, I’d put down Natalie on my predictions ballot, not Emma, and not Annette Bening, goddamn it, and not Isabelle Huppert. “[Persistent freaky baby quality]” in the lead. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 4:57 PM [Emma Stone takes a sick day] [Director Damien Chazelle and actor Ryan Gosling speak onstage at the 28th Annual Palm Springs International Film Festival Film Awards Gala at the Palm Springs Convention Center on January 2, 2017 in Palm Springs, California] And misses the first campaign stop of the year. [Emma Stone] has strep throat, and could not attend the Palm Springs International Film Festival to receive her Vanguard Award - which she shares with [Ryan Gosling] - last night. It's her first sick day of awards season, as she's attended nearly every pre-Oscar stop on the campaign trail, hitting up film festivals from Middleburg, Virginia to Denver… and back again. This time though, Ryan's covering for her, and so is her La La Land writer and director, Damien Chazelle. Last month, Lainey wrote about how Ryan's seemingly able to "[[get] out of everything]" on the La La Land promo tour due, in part, to the Blade Runner 2049 production schedule. Not anymore. Palm Springs matters. It's the tastemaker schmoozefest with plenty of the Academy's more esteemed members and influential VIPs, and takes place two day before Golden Globe ballots are due or, more importantly, three weeks before the Oscar nominations. Ryan was so game to play ball, in fact, that he made an appearance in the PSIFF Instastory talking about how if he could remake any film of his, it would be La La Land, and he also put his hair at risk, in a red carpet interview [that needs to be seen to be believed]. Emma's been everywhere, but this was a big night to miss. Damien Chazelle had her back on-stage. "Emma... wishes she could be here tonight, I wish she could be here tonight. She came down with a bad case of strep throat, so she probably would have made you all sick if she was here... but I did just want to say, on her behalf, or just about her, how lucky I was to have a performer like her as a director to bare her soul every day and to invest in a genre which I think is sometimes misperceived as light and sugar, to invest in that genre with real pathos, which is something she did every day." You can watch his speech here at around the 02:43:13 mark. He's not simply saying that Emma's sick and unable to work the room, he makes sure to add extra gravitas to her performance in La La Land, in case critics wanted to dismiss her performance as light or flimsy. Have you seen La La Land yet? The first twenty minutes is the typical musical we've come to know and love - light, frothy and candy-coated, but it takes a turn and shows what Emma and Ryan truly risk in order to achieve their Hollywood dreams. Damien wants you to notice how hard she worked, and how she nailed the part, because his words and praise could make up for her absence and leave a lasting impression on the room. But the perceived Oscar frontrunner Emma will get another chance to make her mark on Sunday at the Globes, where she'll likely win the Best Actress Musical/Comedy statue. There's still plenty of time for her to work her hustle, but will news of her illness be as memorable as Ryan's on-stage tribute to Debbie Reynolds? Will any good La La Land press translate into good press for Emma? It does not look like she's losing ground yet, but there are certainly less fresh red carpet photos of her. Meanwhile, her biggest Oscar rival Natalie Portman is hustling hard too, walking the press line with her husband, greeting fellow honouree Ruth Negga, and being introduced by none other than Tom Hanks... the most popular guy in the room. Now that's good press. Speaking of good press, I swear I saw a tweet last night that said honouree Andrew Garfield and Ryan Gosling were seated at the same table. This fan account references that: [@jenelleriley] [@emilys_andrewgg] [@kristapley] Ryan gosling and Andrew garfield at the same table. Wow. Emma is a no show — garfield (@MaryMar99015207) [January 3, 2017] So, in theory, had Emma been feeling well enough to attend, there would have (possibly) been new photos of her and her ex, Andrew, together. Fans and gossips have been waiting for new awards season photos of them in the same room. They both attended the Critics' Choice back in December, but kept their distance. Could last night have been the night? Will they "bump" into each other at the Globes? Or will it be the SAGs? What would the possibility of that photo do for her (and his) momentum? [@jenelleriley] [@emilys_andrewgg] [@kristapley] Ryan gosling and Andrew garfield at the same table. Wow. Emma is a no show — garfield (@MaryMar99015207) [January 3, 2017] [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 4:21 PM [Leonardo DiCaprio: new year, same bonafide] [Leonardo DiCaprio with friends and Nina Agdal in Mexico on January 2, 2017] Last year, at exactly this time, it was confirmed that [Leonardo DiCaprio] and Kelly Rohrbach broke up. He was in St Barts for New Year’s Eve, without her, and two days later, every entertainment outlet reported that he was single to kick off 2016. Kelly’s birthday is January 21. She was 25 about to turn 26. Basically, in his eyes, she expired. This year Leo spent NYE in Mexico. And his bonafide of 2016 appears to have carried over to 2017 because [Nina Agdal] was with him. Also the Wolf Pack. But of course the Wolf Pack. As if Leo could celebrate the New Year without his soldiers. As if Leo could actually be alone with a woman for more time than it takes to ejaculate, and even then it’s questionable whether or not requires companionship. The Golden Globes are happening on Sunday. Leo won the Best Actor Drama Golden Globe last year. Brie Larson won Best Actress Drama and has already been announced as a presenter. Leo loves an award season party. It’ll be hard for him to say away from LA this weekend when it’s gonna be so “lit” (which I bet you is totally how he talks). [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 3:27 PM [#HiddenFiguresParty + ticket giveaway] [Janelle Monae arrives at the 28th Annual Palm Springs International Film Festival Film Awards Gala at Palm Springs Convention Center on January 2, 2017 in Palm Springs, California] The cast of Hidden Figures received the Best Ensemble Award at the Palm Springs Film Festival last night. The film opens everywhere Friday. We’ve been yelling at you for months to make plans to go see this movie. In August, I geeked out over the debut trailer’s [blatant celebration of black girl brilliance]. I’m not going to stop yelling at you. Movies about smart, capable women who changed history are few. Movies about the smart, capable BLACK women who made invaluable contributions to American history are nonexistent. [Janelle Monae] told Entertainment Weekly that these women were “[true American heroes.]” Especially when it comes to space exploration, those three words are usually reserved for white guys named Neil or Buzz. Those guys are the heroes, right? Well, Katherine G. Johnson, Dorothy Vaughan, and Mary Jackson are the names Hidden Figures is going to make sure we remember. Johnson, played by [Taraji P Henson], is the last living of the three women featured in Hidden Figures. I love what she said to the film’s director about being the subject of a big film with Oscar potential. “I don’t know why you’re making a movie about me. I just did my work.” She just did the work. She did the work in impossible circumstances – when she had to walk across campus to the colored restrooms and do her work in segregated spaces from her peers. These three women, held together by friendship and genius, just did their work. It’s hard not to get emotional just thinking of their incredible story. When Lainey wrote about the film’s first industry screenings in November, she noted how passionate [the immediate response was from critics]. She also said she wanted seeing this movie to become an event, a #HiddenFiguresParty. Well we’re going this weekend. The party is already happening. Since its limited release on Christmas day, there have been free screenings across America for young girls to see Hidden Figures. When I think of the young women who will recognize their genius because they get to see this film it makes me so f-cking happy I could cry. Taraji P Henson said it best at a press conference for the film that: “When I was growing up, no one ever said to me, ‘You can’t do math because you’re a girl.’ But there was an understanding; you just grew up thinking math and science were for boys. Somebody lied to me, because this woman exists. All these women existed. I made it my mission to do this film, because I didn’t want another girl to grow up believing that lie.” So many of us can relate to this. Growing up, I didn’t know I was capable of being the smartest kid in the class. Black girls could be loud and obnoxious, funny sidekicks or pretty props but never smart. This is why representation matters. If you take away someone’s belief that they can achieve, there’s a good chance they won’t even try. 20th Century Fox has teamed up with Black Girls CODE to create [FutureKatherineJohnsons.com] to encourage young girls of colour to pursue careers in tech and innovation. Hidden Figures’ message is all about inspiring girls to believe they can be mathematicians, scientists, programmers and engineers but it’s also about recognizing the women who already do the damn thing and get erased from the narrative. They aren’t hidden anymore. Let’s make sure their story is SEEN and makes a sh-t ton of money at the box office this weekend, OK? I’m going to make it really easy for you. We’re giving away 5 pairs of tickets in CANADA to see Hidden Figures– consider it your official RSVP to the party. All you have to do is e-mail [contests@laineygossip.com] with #HIDDENFIGURESPARTY as the subject by midnight tomorrow. Winners will be selected by random draw. [Click here] for Contest Terms. Good luck! Whether you win or not, and whether you’re in Canada or not, please support this film. Take your mom. Take your girlfriends. Take your daughters. Take everybody. GO SEE HIDDEN FIGURES THIS WEEKEND. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 3:08 PM [Mimi’s New Year’s Eve Glitter] [Mariah Carey performs during New Year's Eve 2017 in Times Square on December 31, 2016 in New York City] For the last couple of days, it’s been a nasty back and forth between Team [Mimi] and Dick Clark Productions over what really happened on New Year’s Eve during her performance. Her side is claiming that the show “sabotaged” her to create a viral moment and increase ratings. Dick Clark Productions is like, you’re out of your mind, we would never do that to an artist. And an artist of her stature should be able to work through technical glitches. Mimi’s manager, Stella Bulochnikov, who’s getting a LOT of play these days, between the reality show and the NYE shenanigans, was interviewed by Entertainment Weekly about the situation – [click here] to read her comments. My favourite part: “No, I want you to go f-ck yourself”. Talent managers tell people to go f-ck themselves all the time, I’ve witnessed this many times. Very few talent managers tell the media that they’ve told network representatives to go f-ck themselves but this is how Mimi’s talent is being managed now. Still, I’m sorry to disappoint, but I’m not sure why we’re treating Mimi’s NYE’s performance like a Dateline or 48 Hours Mystery to be investigated…really? Do we care about the details? I don’t. I don’t care WHY it happened. All that matters is that it happened. That on New Year’s Eve, on the last night of a trash bitch of a year, this glorious, beautiful thing went down, almost as though 2017 was saying, oh hi, I’m starting a little early, I’m here for you and I know what you need. Because isn’t this what you f-cking needed? Any other artist would have carried on. Any other artist would have made an attempt to save the situation, would have stayed true to the idea that the audience must never know, that the audience deserves an effort. Most artists who are in game shape will push through the obstacles and rely on experience and practice, so much practice, to deliver something if not at standard than at least salvageable. Because most artists try to be professionals. Not Mimi. Mimi is not a professional. Mimi is a dramatist. Mimi’s not interested in turning lemons into lemonade. When it doesn’t go Mimi’s way, Mimi will take those lemons and spray them in your eyes, lemon juice like corrosive acid, complete annihilation. Which is why Mimi’s NYE was so classic Mimi. Mimi’s NYE was basically Glitter. You remember Glitter? Glitter was supposed to be Mimi’s contribution to cinematic excellence. Instead Glitter became one of the worst movies ever, of all time. And this is where you have to give it to our girl. If she’s gonna f-ck up, she’s not gonna half-step her f*ck-up. Mimi’s f*ck-up was so goddamn spectacular, it went from, as a reader called bambam wrote to me, it became a “master class in f-cking up so badly that it still manages to end up right back at amazing”. This is why you’ve watched Glitter more than once. An ordinary bad movie is a one time and done forever. An exhilaratingly bad movie? Becomes a repeat and takes on its own life. How many times have you watched Mimi’s NYE “meltdown”? For me, at least 8. How many memes have been created from these 5 minutes alone? At least a couple dozen, if not more. “Just walk me down.” “This song went to #1 so it is what it is.” And, of course, “I want a holiday too. Can I not have one?” !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! New Year’s Eve was four days ago – and we are STILL talking about this! This moment will live on FOREVER. And there is no one who lives for a “moment”, all of them labelled and categorised and individually sequined, more than the never-elusive Mimi Carey. I will be quoting several lines from this “moment” for the entire year. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 2:28 PM [Sherlock: no longer a “game” but a soap opera] [Sherlock Series 4 teaser stills] SPOILERS Sherlock series four picks up where the Victorian special left off, with Sherlock hauled back to England after being banished for about four minutes because of Moriarty’s seeming return from the grave. The game, as Sherlock is so fond of saying, is on, as he must discover who or what is behind Moriarty’s mysterious return, and he has to do so with his drug habit back in full force. Great set up! If only “The Six Thatchers” was actually about that. Or at least meaningfully incorporated any of that, but it doesn’t. Instead we veer left into the shadowy past of Mary Morstan Watson, one-time mercenary and current wife of John Watson and mother of baby Rosie, and never mind that we already spent series three dealing with Mary’s shadowy past. Mary has always felt like an overcompensation for Irene Adler, who was undermined at the end of “A Scandal in Belgravia”. After botching one prominent Holmes woman, series masterminds Stephen Moffat and Mark Gatiss—who wrote this episode—seemed determined to not do the same to Mary. So she’s smart and witty and capable of keeping up with Sherlock, whom she instinctively knows best how to handle. Okay, fine. The show is better for having someone operating on Sherlock’s level, and Amanda Abbington is having such obvious fun playing Mary that she carries it off. But then Mary also has to be a super-spy assassin with A Past That Came Back To Haunt Her, but that ultimately worked out because they were able to tie Mary’s past to Sherlock’s season nemesis, Charles Magnusson, and in doing so pushed Sherlock the character into a new, interesting direction which in turn pushed Sherlock the show to increased dramatic stakes. Which “The Six Thatchers” promptly undoes. Sherlock murdered Magnusson in full view of dozens of witnesses and he gets off scot-free simply because the show needs him to. There is a chance this can be redeemed in future episodes but that just means future episodes have to fix this mistake made in “Thatchers”. As we stand now, Magnusson’s murder has no consequences for anyone, Sherlock least of all who immediately goes back to solving cases and being a pedantic git to everyone he encounters. As much as we may love pedantic git Sherlock, he is technically off the wagon and just committed murder and it DOESN’T MATTER. Those raised dramatic stakes? Gone. And in their place is nothing. The mystery of the Margaret Thatcher busts has to do with that flash drive Mary already destroyed—but once again, the show just needs it to be back, so it is—and her last mission before starting over as Mary Morstan. Moriarty is, so far, just a red herring, and we have nothing to signal the arrival of Sherlock’s new nemesis, played by Toby Jones. There’s no setup or advancement in this episode, it’s just treading water, and it does the worst possible thing—it [fridges] Mary. Mary dies in Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s stories, so I don’t quibble with her death as a plot POINT, but I do take issue with it being used as a plot DEVICE, and that’s all it is here. Sherlock delves into Mary’s past as a means of trying to protect her but his hubris blinds him to the damage he’s doing until it’s too late and Mary takes a bullet for him. She dies, which should be the humbling of Sherlock Holmes, but a posthumous message for Sherlock is basically a get out of jail free card. Mary exculpates him for any guilt he may feel by saying, “Welp, I always knew this would come back to bite me,” and charging him to look after John. Who, by the way, is compromised by an emotional affair. John is a PTSD-ridden adrenaline junkie who clings to Sherlock for his next fix, so it scans that he would seek out other self-destructive behavior as domestic life with a new family weighs on him. And it scans that he would be mad at Sherlock after Mary’s death, especially if his anger is read, at least in part, as misdirected guilt over seeking companionship other than Mary. What doesn’t scan is that the only way Sherlock and John could be brought into conflict is through Mary’s death. Sherlock could have sussed out the affair, and as he actually likes Mary, that’s all the fuel you need for the two friends to fall out. (It would also serve to continue pushing Sherlock in a more human direction by making him deal with nuanced emotional situations.) Instead, Mary’s death is the fulcrum for their male angst. Benedict Cumberbatch is as blazingly good as ever as Sherlock, especially in the opening scene where it’s implied he is high—a state disappointingly never revisited—but this show is simply no longer about “the game” that Sherlock loves so much. It’s a soap opera, and it’s worse off for it. The indulgent fan service of series three is gone, thank god, but back-seating the mystery for personal problems throws Sherlock off its game. It was at its best when the mystery fueled character revelations and drama, and until that dynamic returns, Sherlock will continue to be a frustrating mixed bag of brilliant performance and second-rate story. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 2:05 PM [Privacy Policy] - [Unsubscribe]