The “Shitheeled” and the “Spittle-chinned”

“Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems.” ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ March 28, 2024 The “Shitheeled” and “Spittle-chinned” — Or, Why We Catastrophize “Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems.” – Epictetus [Special Reminder: In case you missed [our recent announcement]( The Essential Investor has merged with legacy contributors to Agora Financial. The new, larger, more inclusive project is called The Grey Swan Investment Fraternity. If you’re interested in the scope and benefits of our new endeavor, please see what prompted us to merge [here](. If you’ve been a member of The Essential Investor, please keep an eye out for your new benefits.] Dear [Reader], March 28, 2024 – Day three and already the “assisted collapse of the Francis Scott Key bridge” is entering into the absurd phase. Especially here in Baltimore, the networks have been airing an extended, play-by-play, “breaking news,” boots-on-the-ground analysis of the boat, the bridge, the current in the River, the effect on global supply chains, the NTSB investigation, Port Authority, Maryland State Police, the FBI… the Mayo, the  Governor… the President. The money. Keeping up is exhausting. And they have only just begun the investigation proper. The whole story ought to be enough for broadcast networks to sell Bridgestone Tires and Carnival Cruises for at least another week.  If the news cycle isn’t enough for you, there’s always social media — it’s always waiting and ready to occupy all your time. My favorite thread on X right now is being written by the author, journalist, and TV producer, David Simon. Simon used to be a crime journalist for the Baltimore Sun, but he’s probably best known for The Wire, an HBO series about drug dealers and corrupt police in Baltimore’s seedy neighborhoods. He still lives in Baltimore. We join Simon’s thread midstream: CONTINUED BELOW... >>ADVERTISEMENT<< 2024 – The Real Election Year Surprise In 2016, the October Election Surprise was Hillary Clinton’s email scandal… In 2020, the October Election Surprise was the suppression of all the dirty material on Hunter Biden’s “forgotten” laptop… Now, in 2024, we’re forecasting an October Election Surprise that almost no one sees coming — and this time it’ll be way more devastating than anything you’ve seen before. [Click here to learn about 2024’s real October Election Surprise »]( It’s not at all what you think. CONTINUED... “Surely,” writes a challenger to Simon’s characterization of Rep. Marjorie Taylor Green’s (R. GA) hysterical posts following the bridge collapse, “in hindsight you agree that your emotional outburst was disproportionate considering it’s just one of our representatives aksing [sic] a fairly simple question regarding a suspicious incident where people died in a terrible manner. Hardly fear mongering, it’s clearly personal.” To which Simon responds: “Surely you’re not suggesting that the shrew from Georgia, when she invokes the possibility of a terror attack unevidenced and demands an investigation that is already mandated and underway, isn’t doing anything other than fulminating her spittle-chinned political base?” Spittle-chinned? The debate has its own rewards… clever writing worthy of Shakespeare himself. In another exchange, one of the spittle-chinned (we assume) calls Simon a “moron” who clearly doesn’t know how sabotage and cyberattacks work. Simon responds: “Shitheel, because 1) the investigation is mandated by law and already underway when 2) the shrew from Georgia began to demand it and raised, unevidenced and with all the facts pointing opposite, fears of a terror attack to attack her spittle-chinned political base, you included.” Heh. You can’t make this stuff up. There’s more to the thread… like a press-conference scene in one of Simon’s true-crime dramas. After fending off attacks for hours yesterday, Simon, who has a more intimate knowledge of Baltimore City than he’d probably wish on his own worst enemies, says good night and thanks his correspondents for wasting his day. Of course, we have a theory on this... As we all know, social media has infected society. Morphed our views and daily habits. Poisoned our children with ire. A rational person may already be coming to the conclusion these platforms are a waste of time, at best. Social media also provides a platform for primal deviance from which we can’t turn away.  The collapse of the city’s soul-defining bridge has revealed, from a first-hand account, to what lengths narcissists will go to get clicks, views, mentions, attention… what have you. And to what ends. It’s not a coincidence, the word “catastrophize” was added to the Oxford English dictionary early in the so-called “information age”... Anno Domini, 2004. It’s a verb. For our purposes, it means “the act imagining the worst possible outcome of an action or event, or to think about a situation or event as being a catastrophe or having a potentially catastrophic outcome.” (Miriam-Webster) We see something bad happen, and in the void, our human brains fill in the blanks to explain the event. For some ne'er-do-wells, it also means building a scenario online that best advances one’s own agenda. The 19th-century German philosopher Emmanuel Kant advanced the idea of the “categorical imperative” while trying to explain how the brain works.  In short, the world throws so much information at our senses at any one time, the brain constructs categories to be able to assimilate the sights and sounds, smells, tastes… even the way we feel about things… into a coherent thought. The “categorical  imperative” is a defense mechanism used by the brain to collate the physical world and avert insanity. In our post-9/11 experience, Americans added a new category to plug things into: the terror attack. The world as we know it came crashing down around those in the World Trade Towers. For real, for over 2,996 people; metaphorically for the nation. It’s not difficult to understand why, when the bridge collapsed in seconds, it conjured up images of 9/11. For better or worse, the internet… social media… are now an extension of our thoughts, ideas, emotions, and reactions. If the “shitheels” and “spittle-chinned” use it to assuage their own narcissistic fantasies, well, we’ve had a category for that one organized in our brains since the first caveman licked his finger and touched a burning stick. It’s called “politics.” So it goes, Addison Wiggin, The Wiggin Sessions P.S. “Just fabulous,” Raymond from Canada wrote in response to yesterday’s missive. “Simple enough… avoiding audacious ‘multisyllabic verbiage’ as my boyhood Jesuit priest teacher in Jamaica would say. “You all had an informative and absolutely hilarious field day helping to clarify the ‘assisted collapse of the Francis Scott Key Bridge in Baltimore.’ I'm still laughing. And, to end the refrain, the ubiquitous Bill Bonner, thrust home the touche [sic] ...shades of Cyrano Hercule Debergerac. To be informed and entertained, what an absolute joy. Thank you… and again I thank you.” P.P.S. Early in my writing career, I developed a habit which has stuck. Since I primarily covered the stock market on a daily basis (for years) I did not publish on the days the market is closed. It was a self-imposed way to justify taking a day off from work. I was also living in France where they like to look down their pointed noses and say, “Americans live to work, we French? No, no, no… no, we work… to live!” (G’head, imagine saying it with a French accent, it helps.) Tomorrow is Good Friday for those who observe the Christian faith. And as the rules of the country were primarily established by Christians, the stock market has been closed on Good Friday since its inception on May 17, 1792, beneath a tree in lower Manhattan on what is now Wall Street. Tomorrow we’ll be taking the day off. My wife, daughter, and I are traveling to Burlington, Vermot to visit the university there. Along the way back, we’ll be visiting family in New Hampshire. Monday is also a travel day for us. So, breaking with tradition, the presses will be closed on Monday, too. Talk to you again on Tuesday. Enjoy the long weekend ~ Addison Please send your comments, reactions, opprobrium, vitriol and praise to: addison@greyswanfraternity.com. The Daily Missive from The Wiggin Sessions is committed to protecting and respecting your privacy. We do not rent or share your email address. By submitting your email address, you consent to The Wiggn Sessions delivering daily email issues and advertisements. 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