The secret "schemas" that silently control your life (Part 3)

Hey {NAME}, Last week, I started talking about a breakthrough psychological concept called "Schema Therapy"... (including how you can ethically apply it to your marketing to boost sales) And today, I'm wrapping up this series with Part 3. If you missed any of the previous emails... Or if you simply want to catch up before diving into this one, you can do so via the links below: ​[--> Read Part 1]()​ ​[--> Read Part 2]()​ (I strongly suggest you read those first... because this is complex stuff) ... .. . Are you ready? Alright... Let's continue then with: ​ Domain III: Impaired Limits ​ This third domain involves schemas that are tied to issues with setting both personal and interpersonal limits. On a personal level, people with schemas from this domain usually have difficulties controlling their impulses... Sticking to goals... Taking responsibility... And following rules in general. And when it comes to the interpersonal level, people who have this tend to disregard the needs and rights of others... placing themselves above everybody else. This domain includes 2 schemas: ​ Schema #10 - Entitlement/Grandiosity People with this schema have an overly inflated sense of self-importance... And they believe... No... DEMAND that they are entitled to special treatment or privileges. You probably know this type :)) Asshole bosses, nightmare clients, narcissistic exes. The world is full of them, unfortunately. The key thing with this schema is that it causes people who have it to disregard the needs or rights of others... Resulting in lots and lots of conflict. How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Highlight how your buyers will unlock "special privileges" after buying your product 2 - Use messaging that makes them feel more important than others 3 - Trigger their inner "Purpose" Motivation (for example, by tying your product to a world-changing movement or cause) ​ Schema #11 - Insufficient Self-Control and/or Self-Discipline This schema is all about "failing the marshmallow test". Or in other words, difficulty controlling and regulating your impulses and behaviors. People who have this schema can't easily say "No"... Especially to things that promise instant gratification. (alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, or addictive behaviors in general) How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Focus more on selling "impulse buy"-type products 2 - Use a lot of "Paint the Dream"-style copy in your marketing 3 - Create multi-step upsell campaigns ​ Domain IV: Other-Directedness ​ The key thing about this schema is that it makes people believe that the ONLY way to be LOVED is to please others. To accommodate others in their behavior, beliefs, opinions, and attitudes. People with this schema usually pay little attention to their own dreams and desires... And instead live their lives mostly to "serve" everyone else's. (thereby suppressing their own needs) ​ Schema #12 - Subjugation People with this schema tend to prioritize the needs and desires of others over their own... Usually at their own expense. They may feel compelled to comply with others' demands or expectations... Leading to feelings of resentment and powerlessness. How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Use emotional language that makes them feel understood 2 - Dial up the empathy in your copy (I'm serious) 3 - Offer products or services that promote autonomy and independence ​ Schema #13 - Self-Sacrifice This schema involves a pattern of putting others' needs before one's own to an extreme degree... Often to gain approval or avoid rejection. People with this "life trap" may neglect their own well-being and aspirations... Leading to feelings of resentment and burnout. How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Clearly communicate how your product or service helps people (and makes the world a better place) 2 - Focus on highlighting how your product or service can help their work-life balance 3 - Get people feeling more empowered ​ Schema #14 - Approval-Seeking/Recognition-Seeking This schema is all about -- you guessed it -- seeking the approval of others. It's the perfect example of "Keeping up with the Joneses". People with this schema have most of their self-worth directly tied to the opinions of others... And they're usually desperately trying to fit it. How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Highlight how - by purchasing your product - others will be envious (but please don't overdo it. A little bit of this is good... a lot, not so much) 2 - Increase the perception of your products being super cool (Apple is/was great at this) 3 - Use plenty of social proof by people whom they look up to (ex: celebs) ​ Domain V: Overvigilance/Inhibition ​ This domain is all about the minimalization of feelings and emotional expressions in general. You know... the "Strong and silent type". (which we all know usually hides deep, deep emotional scars) People with these types of schemas have VERY strict rules, opinions, beliefs, and moral values about things... And they usually look at the world in a binary way (Good / Bad). This final domain includes 4 schemas: ​ Schema #15 - Negativity/Pessimism People with this schema tend to focus on the negative aspects of themselves and others. (and the world around them in general) They may struggle to recognize all the positive things in their lives... Leading to a sense of hopelessness, resignation, and pessimism (and even depression) How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Make sure you "agitate" their pain in your marketing (and then offer a redemption from it) 2 - Do lots of "future pacing" and explain everything that will happen once they purchase, step-by-step (to lower their anxiety) 3 - Offer a powerful "New Hope" in your storytelling ​ Schema #16 - Emotional Inhibition People with this schema struggle to express their emotions openly or authentically. They may suppress or avoid emotional experiences... (both positive and negative ones!) Leading to difficulties in forming intimate connections and expressing their true needs. They generally look at emotions as "bad". How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Make them feel SAFE in your messaging 2 - Be prepared for longer sales cycles with these types of people (and be patient) 3 - Try to sell them things that don't necessarily need a "personal touch" (ex: home study online courses) ​ Schema #17 - Unrelenting Standards/Hypercriticalness This schema involves setting excessively high standards for oneself or others... And being overly critical of perceived failures or shortcomings. People with this schema may experience chronic dissatisfaction and self-criticism... Leading to feelings of inadequacy and anxiety. How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Show how your product / service will make people perform even higher (especially useful for high-performers) 2 - Give people practical tools that help them quantify their progress (they people LOOOOVE measuring) 3 - Spend time explaining your Unique Mechanism and Methodology in great detail in your marketing messaging ​ Schema #18 - Punitiveness This final schema involves being overly harsh or critical toward oneself (or others) in response to perceived mistakes or shortcomings. People with this schema may engage in self-criticism... And blame others excessively... Leading to feelings of guilt, shame, and resentment. How you can ETHICALLY leverage this schema in your marketing: 1 - Use the "It's not your fault" technique in your messaging 2 - Highlight how - by buying your product - people can "fix" their past mistakes 3 - Give people a "Redemption" opportunity that makes their bad feelings finally go away (and lowers their Guilt) === Annnd that's a wrap for this series. Hope you've enjoyed it, {NAME}. If you did, hit reply and let me know which part resonated with you the most. I'd love to know! Until next time, -Csaba ​ P.S. -- Although not technically based on Schema Therapy... Here's a great book I recommend if -- after reading this email -- you want to DO something about healing yourself. It's called: ​["Healing Everyday Traumas: Free Yourself from the Scars of Bullying, Criticism and Other Old Wounds"...](=)​ And it was written by a fellow subscriber of yours, Lynn Mary Karjala ;) (thanks again for sharing this with me, Lynn 🙏) ​ ALSO, Here are a few ways I can help you, whenever you're ready... 1. Get my "7-Day Rainmaker Email Sequence" template pack for just $7! This is a proven 7-day email campaign designed to quickly give you a surge of new sales from your email list. With these "fill-in-the-blanks" templates, you can start sending high-converting emails within minutes! And right now, you can grab it for just 7 bucks. [Get it here >>]()​ 2. Grab My Million-Dollar Copywriting Swipe Library Steal my MASSIVE, 2000+ page library of various high-converting copywriting samples, including over 130 emails, 81 long-form sales pages, 160 Facebook Ads... and -- of course -- the OFFICIAL swipe file for my 100-Day Proven Sales Letter Breakdown Challenge! [Grab it now >>](​ 3. 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