Fark NotNewsletter: BOO Snuck up on ya, huh?

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1698268208-45769-17540 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [http= s://fark.com/13034868](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message= from Drew Curtis: ___________________= _____ Hey everyone hope your we= ek's been well. I'm a big fan = of Halloween as are several of my friends. One in particular had the = excellent idea to have a Halloween party in the first week of October. = ; I highly recommend doing this - it gets you off your butt to get a costum= e together and it makes the entire month seem like Halloween. On a related note, does anyone have a recom= mendation for a programmable LED display? I'd like to put up a set of= lights and just leave the damn thing up all year, changing the colors base= d on whatever holiday it is. Anyhow, hopefully the weather is great f= or trick or treat next week. Then it's on to turkey season, followed = by Christmas is too damn early season. Thursday 4pm eastern it's the [Fark News Li= vestream](3D")! Everyone's back and ready to rock. Since we took = last week off I've got two weeks worth of material. We may go into th= e Alaska Airlines flight incident, details are emerging and they're all wei= rd. Santos of the week is pretty great, it's been awhile since he tol= d a whopper like the one this week. And also the most Bret Michaels s= tory you will hear this week - maybe the only one but there's a followup on= deck soon. ________________________ End Drew transmission ________________________ Farking Tip You're allow= ed to send in multiple entries to a [Contest](3D". T= op Interactions Some of the best interactions from the past w= eek. Do note: this takes priority over being placed in "top comment= s." - phalamir and co. [clarified the many differ= ent homonyms of "rain."](3D" - GaijinH and co. [redisco= vered cats that look like hitler.](3D") - Excelsior and= co. [wrote several haikus about Alex Jones.](3D") Top Comments Some of the top-voted smar= test and funniest comments from the past week. If your post isn't here, = assume that NotNewsletterMonkey couldn't think of a taglin= e. (The [Smartest=](3D".=) and [Funniest for the past month are found elsewhere.) Funny: -= Algebrat](3D"=)[showcased a classic Fark joke.](=3D" -&= nbsp;elvisaintdeadcursed us with Sexy George Lucas. - JerseyTim[figured out a way to feel like a cre= ep on command.](3D" - Hey Nurse! [thinks this lister co= uld make a great BFF.](3D" - bobtheme: "[Is that wall o= f text load-bearing?](3D")" Smart: - Abe V= igoda's Ghost[rephrased this prosecutorial argument.](3D"https:=) -&nb= sp;covfefe[used their pattern-recognition skills to declar= e a lack of danger.](3D"h=) - optikeye[spotted photo= s that are soon to become evidence.](3D") - aimtastic= ng>[: "I don't see a lot of value in surviving a nuclear holocaust, to be ho= nest."](3D") - Outshined_One[brought us an overly-= truthful Dear Abby.](3D" [Politics](3D" Politics Funny: - Outshined_One[gifted us some Certified Authentic= TFG Ramblings.](3D" - sdd2000[Heinz Ketchup: No= w available in indictment size.](3D") - Devolving_Spud= ong>[cannot wait for Christmas Stollen.](3D") - Dasher McHa= ppenstance[wonders if Breaking Bad rules apply here.](3D"https://w=) -&nb= sp;physt[photographed the Clown Caucus.](3D"htt=) - The Bestest[, Georgia resident, wonders what they'll do with = all those apology letters.](3D"ht=) -[oh my god](3D" foo monkey= ong> [just dove in](3D") Politics Smart: - = IDisposable[wonders how Congresspeople manage to get security clea= rances.](3D"https://=) - Doc Daneeka[noticed the localizat= ion of the TFG tax cuts.](3D" - Snarfangel[wonder= s if the winning move here was not to play.](3D") - Scorpit= ron is reduced to a thin red paste[imagines what the public would = think of a Caribbean island that does exactly what our police are allowed t= o do.](3D" - Psychopusher[realized that behind = Biden's presidency is someone that has to be the adult in the room.](3D" = - Notabunny: "It's extremism dressed up as trying = to help grandma." Monkey's Pick I felt these posts were exceptionally funny or smart, even though they did= n't get many votes. Warning: Unsorted, may contain politics. Funny: - AppleOptionEsc[brought in some S= impsons sign gags from the Internet](3D"). Smart: -&nbs= p;Ketchuponsteakexplained one of the downsides of [being = super attractive] while also being [a horrible person.] - scanman61[wonders when IEDs become no longer considered "impr= ovised."](3D"https=) - Biser[wonders where this Arizona = county gets its mental prosecutors.](3D" - SpectroBoy= ong>[had their nosehole drilled open.](3D") - [Ever wonder why](3D" boy[chose that username?](3D"https=) - Dr Dre= idel[wonders if a car could defend itself in court](3D"=). [CSB](3D"=)Sunday= Morning theme - "[Underw= helming Meals](3D"https:=)" This week, Farkers were asked to share under= whelming meals - be they homecooked, or from a restaurant. [Funny](3D"): - Someone Else's Alt= [was given Chicken Wing Brownies - they tasted kinda like Tomacco.](3D") - Biscuit Tin[made Pumpkin Spice devilled eggs.](3D" > - ingo's gravy had been made with sugar, not = flour. - Gassy Snake[purchased Canned Than= ksgiving.](3D" [Smart](3D"ht=): - Creoena[was given a soggy mess by Five Guys.](3D"https://w=) - i.r.id10t[wishes their mother followed the cookbook more.](3D"http=)= > - Unobtanium[wished the cook would stop substi= tuting based on color and texture, not flavor.](3D" - Magn= us Eisengrim[ordered the most disappointing Reuben on the menu.](3D"https:/=)= > Top Contest Entries Some of the top-voted [contest](=3D" entries from last week. As always, everybody gets one. [Photosh= ops](3D"=): Welcome to the Photoshop threads, Fotosho= p Fiend! And, at the same time - welcome to Fark! - = ;jamspoon[encountered a more expensive kind of mermaid.](3D"ht=)= > - Driver[put up a Zillow listing for Dead End = Dr.](3D" - Terrapin Bound[does not work at Oliv= e Garden.](3D" - Yammering_Splat_Vector[tossed so= me jars in the pool.](3D") - Herb Utsmelz[develope= d a mind transfer device.](3D") - Thrakkorzog[pres= ents: The Cheesecake Wars](3D") - RedZoneTuba[used= the wrong angle for a selfie.](3D") (This thread is great, btw!) - Bon= us: Thoaar and Thrakkorzog[had the same i= dea, at about the same pace.](3D") - EvaDewer[foun= d the opposite pair to the Floridian Boots.](3D") - samsqua= tch[stood too close to the tram.](3D"=) - GoodDocto= rB[did the thing that always happens to your paintbrush.](3D".=) = - FotoshopFiend[gave us a scene from the newest Resi= dent Evil remake. I think.](3D" - I_Am_Weasel[fou= nd someone else to pose for the Blind Melon album cover.](3D") - Thoaar[went through the looking glass.](3D"https:/=) - p51d007[, they're gone - like they never existed!](3D"https://w=) -&nbs= p;Adamata[apologizes for adding another human to the Human= Centipede.](3D"ht=) - koyote11[treated the world lik= e a coloring book.](3D" - meshnoob[visited the ne= west Mario Kart track.](3D") - Stephen_Falken[comm= itted Scary Movie.](3D") - derfiticulum[LOOOOOOOON= G](3D") - i-dig[can't figure out which floofball t= hey want.](3D" Captions: "[Caption this cute couple" - common sense is an oxymoron](3D" know wha= t "patty-cake" means nowadays.](3D") - RedZoneTuba [want= s honey.](3D") "[Caption this absinthe drinker](3D"https:=)" - bea= rded clamorer [can't tell fact(s) from Orion.](3D"https=) - Re= dZoneTuba [is hallucinating depressed old guys.](3D"https://w=) [Farktogra= phy theme](3D"): "[On the Horizon](=3D" This week, Farkers w= ere challenged to show us photos that feature the horizon as part of their = composition. - Elsinore[watched as the sun kisse= d the sea. Lewd.](3D" - bikkurikun[had their snac= ks stolen while taking a photo.](3D") - Lovesandwich= g>[gave us a variant of the Windows 98 desktop background.](3D") - = Pope Larry II[visited the sunset.](=3D" = [Upcoming Fark Parties](3D") It's easy to plan for a Far= k Party - you're effectively saying that "I'm going to be here at this time= , come hang out." [Submit one!](3D"=) [Monday,= April 8, 2024, Total eclipse of the Sun Fark Party at Noon. Buffalo Small = Boat Harbor](3D") Far= k Headlines of the Week A selection of some of the top headli= nes from last week. [French = pilot crashes into Mt. Whitney several times](3D") [Iran into the fray](3D"https=) = [England has a new King. This is a repeat from 50BC](3D") ['We're cleanin' up the rails on a laser train'](3D") [Easyjet flight canceled af= ter reaching defcon level 2, sorry that's defecation level 2](3D"h=) = [Officials at O'Hare International Airport confiscate 15 pounds of ra= w goat organs. That's just offal](3D") [Youth dies after falling from Giant. MAGIC BEANS; NOT EVEN ONCE=](3D"=) [35 portable toilets, some of them full, s= tolen from racetrack. Police have nothing to go on](3D" [What do we g= et for ten dollars?](3D"=) Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45ta= llboy) Another fun time on the Quiz last week, where we learned= that ultrawide monitors may be great for gaming, but they're not optimal f= or surfing the web. On the Quiz itself, Denjiro came out o= n top with 944, followed by needalife in second with = 942 and Brewster in third with 931. The = Third Man was fourth with 930, and mrfu32 ma= de it into the top five with 927. The hardest question on the= Hard Quiz last week was about where $400,000 in stolen beef wound up when = the truck it was in was stolen. Only 39% of quiztakers caught the article a= bout the thieves deciding a vegetable farm was the best place to unload the= purloined meat. Because that's definitely not going to stick out among the= squash and potatoes. The easiest question on last week's Har= d Quiz was about what is the world's top-selling video game of all time, no= t including Tetris because of the sheer number of unlicensed clones of the = shape-dropping game. 83% of quiztakers knew that Minecraft has now sold ove= r 300 million copies, meaning Microsoft really was onto something when they= paid game author Notch $2.5 billion for it back in 2014 - when it had sold= only 50 million copies. In comparison, Grand Theft Auto V has sold 185 mil= lion copies, and PUBG: Battlegrounds has sold 75 million. The harde= st question on last week's Easy Quiz was about techno DJ D-Sol, known for o= ccasional club gigs and even playing Lollapalooza in 2022. Only 43% of quiz= takers knew that David Solomon's day job was CEO of Goldman Sachs, an inves= tment bank that accounts for approximately 2.2% of the entire US economy. I= t's rumored that he hasn't played publicly since Lollapalooza due to pressu= re from the Board of Directors to focus solely on CEO things, but I think h= e should maybe offer them some of those recreational pharmaceuticals and gl= ow sticks and see if they change their mind. The easiest question = on last week's Easy Quiz was about which drummer was likely responsible for= the popularity of the lava lamp. 93% of quiztakers knew it was Ringo Starr= who was one of the earliest buyers of the groovy icon of pop culture, and = the shop that sold it to him was not afraid to tell everyone. He's not the = only Beatle with an affinity for them, though - Paul McCartney will often h= ave them on stage in memory of his late wife Linda, who was another lover o= f the mesmerizing gizmo. If you missed out last week, now's a= great time to [catch = up on the Fark Weird News Quiz](3D"=) now that you know a few of the answers. = Congratulations once again to the winners, and we'll do it all again on Fri= day. --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") f= rom newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click here to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1291, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1698268208-45769-17540--