Fark NotNewsletter: How to Fark your way to the top

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1497287498-71152-66557 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D") [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A mes= sage from Drew Curtis: A quick reminder - I know it= 's a couple of steps to go through, but if you could sign up for either [TotalFark](3D") or [BareFark](3D"https=), and/or sign up a friend, it ma= y not seem like much but it makes a huge difference to us! Seriously,= we would not have made it through the first six months of 2017 without the= help of everyone who's signed up so far. Thank you so much!  = ; We've been highlighting the top entries from a thread about the best t= hings that have happened in real life to folks as a result of being a membe= r of the Fark community, and this week the winning entry is from ho= rnblowerfan with a story about improved job prospects: ----- Long story short: a very rude and snappish recruiter I= just signed up with (through referral) was having a bit of a day, and his = only funny moment was some vague reference to a meme I saw on Fark the day = before. He lit up like a Christmas tree when I got the joke. We then spent = an hour talking about our favorite stories and memes on Fark. = Then he said, "I'm not going to recommend you for this job you are dying to= get, because the people are awful and you'll hate it. You are too good of = a person for this job. Give me some time to find something else for you." I was a bit stunned, but...three weeks later, he quickly got me= real dream job (there were 186 applicants!!), had my cross-country move pa= id for, and got 120% of the salary I was asking. All because o= f Fark. Seriously. Thank you! ________________________ &nbs= p; We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.  = ; ________________________ Comment Mentions The number of commen= ts these words were mentioned in on Fark and TotalFark in the past week. No= te: This does not mean they were the most-used words Vi= ndicated - 75 Russian hookers - 38 Adam West - 111 Batman - 357 Bacon - 329 Com= ment Votes Some of the top-voted smartest and funni= est comments from the past week Funniest: = phlegmmo shared a photo of [Selena G= omez with sidebewb](3D" PirateKing let us know the names= of [George and Amal Clooney's kids](3D") AgentKGB said [goodbye to A= dam West](=3D" with a wonderful animated image Bith Set Me Up = rong>was [shocked by someone's name](3D"=) Adam West for President reacted to news of [Adam West's death](3D") gilgigamesh saw ot= her uses for "[a taco truck at every mosque= a>" Bith Set Me Up](3D"=)[compl= eted a word in a Fark headline](3D" in the best way possible bear= ded clamorer showed [one way to deal= with acoustic guitar players](3D=) lindalouwho continued= the [theme of the comments thread](3D") Veda_Pierce found [a new band n= ame](=3D" Smartest: amfv had [nice things to say about Adam West](3D") = APO_Buddha shared a [related headlin= e from "The Onion"](3D=) fatalvenom had advice for a guy = with [a jealous girlfriend](3D") Wea= ver95 explained why people's [bad be= havior is often blamed on Trump](3D" Skarekrough shared = a [comic about gun violence](3D") Ai= rForceVet thought a [man's act to sa= ve kids was justifiable](3D=) Cyrus the Mediocre [checked out some astronomical charts](3D") = themindiswatching had a very [contro= versial opinion about pizza](3D" Dancin_In_Anson explain= ed [why a guy liked a butt pic on Instagram=](3D") Psychopusher was impressed that a [cop didn't lose his temper](3D") TotalFark Di= scussion: Note: Comments in this section can only be accessed by [TotalFarkers](3D") rcf1105 explained [what the hell is wrong with Bill Maher](3D") CSB Sunday Morning: Nobody submitted one! But here's a message from= dugitman: ________________________ = There wasn't a CSB thread on Sunday, June 4th because I was on vacation= and forgot to have it set up ahead of time. It's the first week we've miss= ed in nearly three years, so apologies to all of you who follow the thread = weekly. The next 3-5 weeks= , we'll have new topics and an added b= onus for non-TotalFarkers.A generous F= arker has donated $500 with the stipulation it be given out as a one-year g= ift for 10 CSBs in the near future. One of the best things about this forma= t has always been its free-form and meandering nature, so rather than have = a single thread, or multi-thread "contest" type atmosphere with rigid rules= for winners, we're going to turn it over to you users for giving out the 1= 0 TotalFark gifts. As always, you can upvote the posts using the "smart" bu= tton, but feel free to quote great posts with a "smarted," or "TF" or +1, o= r whatever you want to sort of double nominate it. Along with the most "sma= rted" posts, modmins will go through the threads to pick a few of the later= entries that didn't get the early voting love. Finally= , thanks to all of you for making CSB Sunday Morning a cool weekly feature = that shows there's a human side to a bunch of funny login names who spend m= ost of their time snarking the internet and each other. ______= __________________ If you would like to suggest a topic for a = CSB Sunday Morning thread, please email [dugitman= trong>](3D". Politics Funniest: Rev.K = ong>provided an excerpt from [James Comey's o= pening statement](3D=) xraygun shared [the secret behind Trump's "covfefe" tweet](3D") Mad Sc= ientist showed off [a very handsome = flask](3D"=) Pocket Ninja got technical about the [United States Flag Code](3D") HighOnCraic explained [Sarah Huckabee Sanders' em= oji-filled tweet](3D"=) Politics Smartest: op= tikeye thought that [Eric Trump was = projecting](3D=) NewportBarGuy responded to the question,= "[Is Trump trying to provoke a domestic terr= or attack?](3D")" Farking Clown Shoes had a [message for Donald Trump](3D") Chariset = >[got a point across without using words](3D")sno man made an argument for [taxpayer-funded birth control](3D" Contest Votes Some of the = top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of vot= es down Photoshops: Pure Weapons-Grade Bol= onium made an ad for [the first "H= ousewives" show worth checking out](=3D" Beltway Bandito'= s [movie poster is in really poor taste](3D")ToastmasterGeneral created [a contest where there are no winners](3D" Iggie made a "Star Trek" movie for the true fans = Circusdog320's movie featured [the hero we all need](3D" RedZoneTuba put imitation Sonny and Cher outside Alligat= or made [a very picky "Bachelorette"=](3D"=) #2 showed us [what a= young Captain Kangaroo looked like](3D" stertz designed= [a kickass shirt](3D") Surly U. Jes= t showed that [Dolly Parton re-custo= mized Bob Hope's golf cart](3D"https=) Farktography: orionid won Farktography Contest No. 631: "[Grave Good= s](3D" with a [loving memorial and touching s= tory](3D"=) If you would like to suggest a theme for a Farktography c= ontest, you can contact [Elsinore](=3D" or stop by th= e [Farktography Forum](3D"). Upcoming Fark Parties See Farkers up c= lose in their unnatural habitats Saturday, June 24th: [Bay Area Fark Party - Oakla= nd Beer Trail](3D") Wednesday, July 19th: [5th Annua= l Farks In The Wild at the Buffalo, NY Zoo](3D") If you'd like t= o plan a Fark Party in your area, you can use the [Fark Party submission form=](3D". Fark Headl= ines of the Week (brought to you by ox45tallboy= ) [I'm here to drink tea and kick ass, and= I'm all out of tea](3D"h=) ["My goodness My gracious" / t= hey shouted "Come see 'em" / It's something brand new / A Dr. Seuss museum](3D" rescued from claw machine after firefighters = spend 30 minutes and $20 trying to win him back](3D".=) [Y= es. Well, when I see 5 weirdos dressed in togas stabbing the President in t= he middle of the park in full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastards. Tha= t's *my* policy](3D" ISIS leader reported killed in ai= r strike; Sterling Archer inconsolable, erect [Mik= e Vick: "Nobody plays the way I played" doggone it](3D" [Olive oil may prevent brain tumors. Popeye impressed](3D") ['The Mummy' features a creepy, ageless creature who seeks nothing but= world domination. But enough about Tom Cruise](3D") [= 9875;🚥🚥🚥🚥⚓🚥🚥🚥= 🚥🚥🚥🚥🗺🗺🗺🗺= 28506;🗺🏰🗺🗺🏰🏰🏰Ԇ= 78; :/9//&🗿🛩⛩🏚 #🚦lolaklkk🚥= ;🚦⛲🚝🚦🚞🚢🚂](3D"  = ; [Gambling addicts love Maryland's voluntary casino ban program= , it's like having your chips and losing them too](3D") You can = find the rest of [the Fark Headlines of the Week here](3D".=). Don't fo= rget to vote for your favorites. Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy) &= nbsp; We had a tough one this week for you this week, as no on= e broke into the 1000 club. No Catchy Nickname came in fir= st with 918, followed by Lord Jubjub in second with 914.&n= bsp;ayslinnaria hit third with 910, followed by Wo= oWarrior at 891 and nomen est omen rounding = out the top 5 with a respectable 884. The toughest question th= is week was over what corporate fast food chain took the initiative and rol= led out a stoner-friendly billboard in New Mexico. Only 26% of quiztakers s= aw the article and knew that it was a local McDonald's franchise trying to = pack in the seats like a Phish concert for its breakfast burrito. = The easiest question this week was on what you can buy at a photo kiosk= in a mall in Moscow. 75% of our quiztakers knew that a few extra Rubles ca= n get you a few extra Instagram likes. This says something about our modern= life, but I'm not sure what. On the Easy Quiz, the hardest qu= estion was over who would provide the MIT commencement address this year. O= nly 38% of quiztakers caught the article about Tim Cook bringing it to the = nation's newest generation of engineers and technological innovators, I'm g= uessing Elon Musk would have done it, but dang, is that guy busy or what? The easiest question on the Easy Quiz this week was over what s= pecies has been determined in court to be nonhuman and therefore ineligible= for a writ of habeus corpus, and can therefore be detained in a cage indef= initely without trial. 92% of quiztakers knew it was the chimpanzee that wa= s determined to not need a writ of habeus corpus. Personally, I think= they should have started somewhere else, as now we're apparently going to = get rampaging tigers wandering around with lawyers running behind them with= sheaths of paperwork demanding people sign disclaimers. If yo= u haven't had the chance, you can take this week's [Fark Weird News Quiz ri= ght here](3D". --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter email= to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"http:/=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click here= to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. 333 West Vine St Suite 210, Lexington KY 40507 = ------------=_1497287498-71152-66557--