Fark NotNewsletter: Feeling old, butts, and feeling old butts

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1651701936-92269-51068 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [ 20400](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message = from Drew Curtis: ____________________= ____ Hey everyone, hope your week's been going well. Bu= sy week here at Fark HQ made busier by end-of-school-year events. Fun= fact: Storm, who was [born during the early years of F= ark](3D"https:=), is graduating high school at the end of this month. He's tak= ing at least a semester off while we inspect school options. I keep t= rying to get him to submit links to Fark and such but so far he's a little = more serious than I was at, well, any age really. As an added bonus, Chance= turns 16 this summer, so I get to teach him how to drive. Can't wait= for that. Thursday at 4 p.m. it's the [Fark = News Livestream](3D"): Christine's on a plane so we'll miss her, but Dill Her= o, Lucky Yates, and Rebecca Watson will be with me. Kind of a rough w= eek for fun news, but luckily there was some. In particular, lots of = interesting science news. Blood donations that lower PFAS in the bloodstrea= m, did a cube come out of the sun? (no), and the yeet of all yeets. = And I was gonna do the Roomba break-in story but NPR ran that one this morn= ing. Ah well. Plus, a rekindling of the great Overwatch Tracer butt d= ebate. ________________________ End Drew = g> transmission ________________________ Top Comments Some of the top-v= oted smartest and funniest comments from the past week Funny:= m> SpectroBoy shared [a picnic tip](3D" foo monkey thought about [what it's like to be an influencer](3D") BigMax figured out [wh= y a grocery store manager attacked a customer](3D" NeoCortex42 = strong> knew [how to work customer ser= vice](3D"=) Winterlight had [time to get drunk before a flight](3D" jbc tol= d us [the best places to eat at if we'= re in Arkansas](3D"=) nmrsnr thought [Serena Southerlyn might've been onto something](3D") Lochsteppe revealed [wh= o bought Gawker](3D" TWX wanted to [purchase a piece of celebrity memorabilia](3D") = gunga galunga commented on [people supposedly being offended by Steve Martin's classic King Tut sketc= h](3D" Smart: NeoCortex42 pointed out&n= bsp;[the truth to any "Girls Gone Wild" fan= s](3D") WickerNipple interpreted [a Florida sheriff's encouragement to shoot anyone who's break= ing into your house](3D") foo monkey [longed for the rich guys of yesteryear](3D") Spectro= Boy shared an example of [wh= at happens now when employers start making everyone go back to working in t= he office](3D" Klivian had [solid advice for managers and business owners](3D" th= e voice of raisin gave some background information about [an area in B.C. where an American air force c= olonel was caught speeding](3D") Natalie Portmanteau exp= lained [how drug dealers market their = inventory to kids](3D"=) Nhojwolfe revealed [the harsh truth about being a manager](3D") Gordon Bennett reminded us [where some of our laws came from](3D" CSB Sunday Morning theme= : [= Festivals, carnivals and fairs](3D"=) Smart: kokomo6= 1 [learned something at a firewor= ks show](3D"=) Funny: whatsupchuck [was very popular at the Renaissance fair](3D") Politics Funny: OdradekRex found someone t= o reply to [Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis'= claim that sexuality is injected into cartoons today, unlike when we were = kids](3D".=) DammitIForgotMyLogin figured that [the kids who threw eggs at the "People's Convoy"= truckers did just fine](3D") Hagbardr added to [Matt Gaetz's boast that "While I was protecti= ng President Trump from impeachment, [Kevin McCarthy and Steve Scalise] wer= e protecting Liz Cheney from criticism](3D") NeoCortex42 = came up with [a way a C-SPAN caller c= ould've recovered from an awful way to begin a sentence](3D"https://w=) Spec= troBoy [touched up a photo of Mad= ison Cawthorn](3D"=) Politics Smart: Mad Scientist = thought [one person in part= icular ought to watch C-SPAN](3D"https=) shastacola pointed ou= t [why Mike Pence knew better than to = get into that car](3D") puffy999 discussed [coaches who insist on praying with players before = a game](3D") Bondith had [a counterpoint for Sen. Rand Paul](3D" DanInKansas = ng> shared a story about [talking to= a z-hole](=3D" Top Contest En= tries Some of the top-voted contest entries from last wee= k Photoshops: RedZoneTuba was [ready to party](3D") brainlordmesomo= rph [set up a queen fight](3D"=) = Redwing [took off to figh= t our star](3D"ht=) Wrongo learned that [hubris gets your wax off](3D") Yammering_Splat_= Vector [should've done the safety= dance instead](3D"=) bugdozer showed us [someone who was about to learn a lesson](3D") Redwing [put Putin on the queen= 's horse](3D"https://=) bugdozer found out [why there's no dancing in basketball](3D") James_= Corn [decided to hang around](3D"=)Circusdog320 showed [the queen with her top employees](3D" Farktography theme= : [In Bloom](3D") This contest ended i= n a tie with Enigmamf's [grateful flower](3D" and Circusdog320's = [bold violet bloom](3D") The final= Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake= : Show & Tell Vol. 18: Our Final Weekly Contest. As our "Fart= ist Fridays" contests come to an end, share with us your photos, paintings,= jewelry, digital artwork, poetry, etc. - any art medium! You can post art = that's brand new or brand old, and (for a change) even if it's been entered= into our contest before too. Thank you to all the F'Artistes who have part= icipated in the contests over the past 2 years. Fartist Friday started in M= arch 2020 because a lot of us were stuck at home. It's been wonderful hosti= ng these threads each week and a joy seeing so many wonderful creations. Fark Headlines of the Week= A selection of some of the top headlines from last week [Au shiat](3D") [Le Pen is not mightier](3D") [Drones rain blood from the sky in Rwanda. A= nd the world applauds](3D") Either Mount Etn= a is erupting again, or Daenerys Targaryen is about to destroy King's Landi= ng [Hamilton throws awa= y his shot](3D"=) [Ja Morant won Most Improved Player in the NBA.= And then immediately gives his award to his teammate Desmond Bane because = he deserved it more. Ja rules](3D"https:=) [Disney doesn't give a fark. Not a single one](3D") [I put on my robe and wizard's= flap](3D") [There's a new Star Wars-themed campsite in upst= ate New York. Because when you think about people who go outside frequently= , you think of Star Wars fans](3D"=) [The Judd](3D" [Marbury vs. = Madison? Sorry, I'm not into boxing](3D") [Missouri lawmakers consid= ering the idea that people under 25 aren't mature enough to understand thei= r own gender. Getting married at 16 still A-OK](3D") [= Republicans are really pissed that Madison Cawthorn dimed on their coke org= ies](3D") [Fewer meetings boost= job satisfaction. Meeting to discuss how to have fewer meetings scheduled = for 3 p.m.](3D"=) [Fark ma= scot has a ball, and has a ball](3D"https:=) Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox4= 5tallboy) Another fun time on the Quiz last week, where we = learned that the ZX Spectrum was supposed to do more than just play video g= ames. On the Quiz itself, Joelogon came out on top with a = score of 940, followed by i8sumpie in second with 937= and maddog2030 in third with 917. wears= manyhats made fourth with 914, and terrybear= rounds out the top five with 910. The hardest question on last week= 's Hard Quiz was about the invasion of Canadian cuisine smack dab in the mi= ddle of the Deep South. Only 28% of quiztakers caught the article about Tim= Horton's bringing Timbits and poutine deep into the heart of Waffle House = country in Georgia. And yes, people, Lookout Mountain (specifically Rock Ci= ty atop the mountain) is located in Georgia - although you pretty much have= to get to it through Tennessee. The easiest question on last = week's Hard Quiz was about the "suspicious device" found on a Staten Island= MTA bus. 77% of quiztakers knew that it wasn't Pete Davidson's bong, since= he usually keeps up with those. It was actually a child's science project,= with an emphasis on "was" since it became a Bomb Squad Procedure Training = Project. Hopefully they at least showed the kid the film so he or she could= record *some* results. The hardest question on last week's Ea= sy Quiz was about popular streaming serieseseses. Only 69% of quiztakers kn= ew that you'd find the Waffle Party scene at Lumon Industries in the Apple+= series Severance. Which I highly recommend, not least becaus= e of the great performances by John Turtorro and Christopher Walken. The easiest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about what you cou= ld win in a new promotional sweepstakes from Snyder's of Hanover. 88% of qu= iztakers knew that their main business is pretzels and their most popular p= ackaged item is Pretzel Pieces with many different flavors including Hot Bu= ffalo Wing, Honey Mustard, Cinnamon & Brown Sugar, and Pickled Onion. I= may have made one of those up. If you missed out last week, n= ow's a great time to [catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz now that you know a few of the answers. Congratulations to the winners,= and we'll be doing it all again this Friday.](3D"ht=) --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. 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