Fark NotNewsletter: Your time machine to last week

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1633549678-14350-54272 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [ 18181](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message = from Drew Curtis: ____________________= ____ Thursday at 4 p.m. Eastern it's [t= he Fark News Livestream](3D") with me, Christine, and Trevor. Assuming = everything isn't hacked by then. In fact, if you've been considering gettin= g hacked, this is the week for it - the news cycle is completely overloaded= with hacks. We'll cover a few of them, including a huge one that got compl= etely lost in the news cycle. Plus - mandatory vasectomies in Pennsyl= vania, boobs on I75, and humping skeletons. As an added bonus, who wa= nts to trade a Soviet space shuttle for a 19th century warlord skull? = Some guy in Kazakhstan. Very Nice. ________________________ We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter. _________= _______________ Top Co= mments Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest commen= ts from the past week Funny: Rev.K car= efully considered [the wisdom of intr= oducing brick to ballsack](3D"https=) thatguyoverthere70 [examined Hitler's legacy](3D") Rev.K was [going to need some ultra-= strength sunscreen](3D"=) Spectrum [corrected aleister_greynight's statement about= Netflix ruining the aspect ratio of "Seinfeld" episodes](3D" niv= ekfalk suggested [a compromi= se on demands to rename a telescope that's named for a NASA administrator w= ho discriminated against gays and lesbians](=3D" Remnants of Santa= explained [why having to shop fo= r one's own groceries isn't an issue right now](3D"https:/=) khitsicker = strong> shared [a video of a 20-year-o= ld man who unfortunately died of COVID-19](3D"https://=) sforce c= ommented on [an article about a Farker= 's wife's "habitual drunken driver" ex-husband who has to pay $12.5 million= after losing a civil case](3D"=) kbronsito noted [the irony when a subway rider angrily ripped= down ads that offended her](3D") Demetrius helpfully&nb= sp;[captioned an image from a video of a tr= uck that sped across eight lanes of traffic without hitting anyone](3D") Smart: AtlanticCoast63 explained [the story behind a headline about a judgement = against the wife's former husband](3D") Purple_Urkle desc= ribed the phenomenon of [people denyin= g COVID up until the moment they die of COVID](3D=) foo monkey = trong> shared [a good idea for Uber an= d Lyft drivers in a country where people can't afford ambulance rides](3D"https://w=)no1curr [actually does = curr about some people whose boss made them do the right thing](3D"=) Hey Nurse! talked about [using medical marijuana](3D" 2fardownthread shared&nb= sp;[a lesson symbolized by a handkerchief i= n a baggie pinned to a tree](3D") CSB Sunday Morning: ["Hold my beer, I wanna try something" moments](3D") Sma= rt & Funny: Winterlight [watched as a group of neighbors set out to cut down a couple = of trees](3D" CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Fa= rkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. I= f you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please [con= tact Farkback](3D" ahead of time, or just [submit it](3D" on Saturday af= ternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads ha= ve a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they wil= l be. Politics Funny: Badmoodman figure= d that [legendary political cartoonist= Ben Garrison would be just fine after getting sick with COVID-19](3D"=) Ghastly made it much easier to [understand the information being shared in a forum post](3D" Cake Hunter [acted as Sub Human's legal counsel](3D"h=) Hey Nurse! = g> knew [why President Biden didn't fl= inch when he got his booster shot in front of reporters](3D"=) Badm= oodman explained [a politica= l ad featuring a trash-talking New Yorker with a thick accent](=3D" Politics Smart: HugeMistake let us know [what kind of "LBJ stuff" Biden might be fixi= ng to do](3D") Chariset had a theory about [why COVID-19 is such a strongly political issue in= the U.S.](3D") Fingerware Error pointed out [one of the problems with the Texas attorney gene= ral's statement that the state's abortion restriction stimulates interstate= commerce](3D") mrshowrules worked out [how devastating it was for Legacy Health to put 794 un= vaccinated workers on leave](3D") Martian_Astronomer had= [a colorful way of explaining the rea= son for vaccine mandates](3D") Top Contest Entries Some of the top-voted contest entrie= s from last week, listed from highest number of votes down Photo= shops: Stantz designed [a trillion-dollar coin to be used for Evil](3D" artif= ishy had [money put away for= a day when the bloody weather is bad](3D"http=) Yammering_Splat_Vector= [surprised the former secretary = of the treasury with new currency](3D".=) Yammering_Splat_Vector = trong> [did the thing with the Kent State s= hooting photo](3D") RedZoneTuba found [the Grim Reaper in disguise](3D") RedZoneTuba = [turned the lamp all the way up= a> Yammering_Splat_Vector showed that](3D"=)[this princess knew how to party](3D") Trolli= ngForColumbine found [a warm= er hat for snowy South Park](3D" RedZoneTuba decided to= [torture a pensioner](3D") c= lovercat has apparently been buying [cat food that's rich in minerals](3D" Fartist Friday:= m> [Write a poem paying homage to Autumn](3D") EdgeRunner = issued [a warning to peopl= e who give out raisins to trick-or-treaters](3D"https:=) This week's= Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake:= > Curiouser and curiouser, we're celebrating "Curious Events Day" by creati= ng art that "explains" unexplainable events. Crop circles. Loch Ness Monste= r sightings. Mothman vs Godzilla. Explain for us these or other Unexplainab= le Curious Events. All art mediums allowed. All art must be original & = created new for this contest. Farktography: [Bugged Out 2](3D") This one ended in a tie with = Clockwork Kumquat's [tiny dragon](3D" and Lovesandwich's [squatting butterfly](3D") Fark Headlines of the Week A selection = of some of the top headlines from last week [In the weeks since a Michigan doctor wrote ab= out 8 combative COVID patients, 6 of them have died. Hope he has a good ali= bi](3D") [Nine hurt when escalator malfunctions at B= oston train station. Authorities say they're taking steps to ensure it neve= r happens again, but they keep reappearing](3D"=) [President Biden gets shot live on TV](3D") [Guil-pee](3D") [So much for alcohol being a disinfectant](3D") [New Merck drug "Molnupiravir" may cut Co= vid hospitalizations and death in half, can only be wielded by Thor](3D") = [Dolphins' loss to Raiders included= a play so bad, even Bears head coach Matt Nagy hadn't thought of it](3D") [NBC decides i= t's not done done with "Law & Order"](3D") [As the poison filled his veins, Gov Kemp (R-GA) tu= rned to the Donald and said, "Why did you do that? Why did you rip me and s= peak nicely of my Democratic opponent?" "I couldn't help it," said the Dona= ld. "It's my nature"](3D") [Did Te= nnessee Earn eFord?](=3D" [Saying "this is not 1973," economist rules out "s= tagflation" and persistent price pressures, but would not comment on the "W= IN" button on his lapel](=3D") Mother and son caught cavorti= ng on local beach, exclusive photos from Fox News [Today is National Corned Beef Hash Day, so let's a= ll compare the pros and cons of beef-based MD5 versus SHA-256](3D") [Why alcohol is used to p= reserve things. Point: have you seen Keith Richards? Counterpoint: have you= seen Keith Richards](3D") Far= k Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy= trong>) Another fun time on the Quiz last week, where I learned= to not use so many cloves in a 36-hour brine of roast beef, On the Quiz it= self, Xanadone takes the top spot with 1018 and a key to t= he 1000 club, followed by Denjiro in second with 986 = and WoolyManwich and bterrien t= ied for third with 922. SoundOfOneHandWanking makes f= ourth 5 with 921, and No Catchy Nickname finishes out= the top five with 919. The hardest question on last week's Ha= rd Quiz was about the creepy clowns seen hanging out around elementary scho= ols in Singapore. Only 33% of quiztakers knew that they were there as a mar= keting stunt to encourage kids to sign up for foreign language classes. Whi= ch, I guess kinda works, in that it makes the kids realize they should have= the ability to flee to another country if creepy clowns take over their ow= n, and speaking a foreign language could help them tremendously with this. The easiest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about Paul Ru= sesabagina and his recent conviction on terrorism charges. 85% of quiztaker= s knew that his story of housing Hutu and Tutsi rebels during the Rwandan g= enocide was dramatized by actor Don Cheadle in the movie "Hotel Rwanda". Hi= s conviction stems from his association with a rebel group that claimed res= ponsibility for 2018 terror attacks. Meanwhile, Don Cheadle has still not a= ccepted responsibility for agreeing to be in "Swordfish". The = hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about new mom Claire Elis Bou= cher and her child that calls her "Claire" instead of "Mom". Only 45% recog= nized the name as the birth name of artist Grimes. I mean, in a way I guess= it's kind of fair, since his parents can't even agree on how his own name = is pronounced. I'm sure little X Æ A-XII is going to grow up to = be a perfectly well-adjusted child and have no problems getting teased in s= chool. Although he will definitely have the coolest toys, though, which mig= ht make up for it. The easiest question on last week's Easy Quiz was= about classic TV. 91% of quiztakers knew that before "Little House on the = Prairie'', Michael Landon was a very successful actor on the series "Bonanz= a", where he portrayed Little Joe Cartwright in all 430 episodes of the sho= w from 1959 until it ended in 1973. He and Lorne Greene, who played Little = Joe's father Ben, were the only actors to appear in every episode. Hard to = believe with all that western-style acting that he was born in Queens and g= rew up in New Jersey, but he did a great job with the accents all through h= is career. If you missed out on last week's Quiz, [be s= ure to catch up](3D" now that you know a few of the answers. Congratulations= to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week. --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click her= e to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1713, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1633549678-14350-54272--