Fark NotNewsletter: Shipping gas and fireworks, hopefully not together

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1625081253-58516-54911 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [ 53319](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message = from Drew Curtis: ____________________= ____ Hey everyone, hope your week's been going well. Several times a year every year we've seen articles about how there = will be traffic before Memorial Day / July 4th / Labor Day / Thanksgiving /= Christmas, etc., but for the second time in the 22 year history of Fark, w= e've had a new variation. This year apparently there's a risk [running out of gas](3D") due to a truck driver shortage. = ; On the one hand, it's nice to see a new version of the same old article. = But on the other hand, I wish it could have been something more upbeat.&nbs= p; On the same note, we've been seeing articles about a [firework shortage](3D") since last w= eek. That one I find suspicious because the warning's being sounded b= y the same folks who make the fireworks. I might be willing to risk t= hat one. Speaking of other new twists on news tropes, someone [baked cookies in his car](3D") in Texas. I may= give this a try myself later. The [Fark News= Livestream](3D") is set for Thursday, 5:30 p.m. The top 15 story pool = was a little thin, but then Wednesday happened and we are locked and loaded= . Get ready for a bumper crop of buried ledes. ___________________= _____ We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.________________________ Top Comments Some of the top-voted smartest and funn= iest comments from the past week Funny: puffy999= defended [theories on the c= ause of the partial collapse of a building in Florida](3D"htt=) in a reply to&nbs= p;potierr dave0821 wondered about [the 22.5-year prison sentence given to Derek Chauvin](3D")T-Boy speculated on [John McAfee's death](3D" Eravior figured that = [other companies could follow Peloton's lea= d of bricking their products for non-subscribers](3D") DarkSoulNoH= ope envisioned [a bad sign= from Boeing](=3D" Benevolent Misanthrope shared a story= about [a frustrated man defending his= mailbox](3D"=) NewportBarGuy had a guess about [the collapsed condo building near Miami](3D") Johnson feared [mor= e changes after Peloton tried going subscription-only](3D" Teleph= one Sanitizer Second Class had [a different name for the new dating show that has participants wea= ring elaborate costumes](3D" Nurglitch expanded on the = belief that [men lose "life force" eve= ry time they ejaculate](3D"=) Smart: Gyrfalcon = rong> [put Derek Chauvin's sentence into pe= rspective](3D") scottydoesntknow defended a man who = ;[installed a reinforced mailbox after pr= evious ones kept getting damaged](3D") Benevolent Misanthrope = rong> shared a story about [a frustrat= ed man defending his mailbox](=3D" scottydoesntknow shar= ed a story about [a kid whose purpos= e in life was to serve as a warning to others](3D"https:=) Pocket Ninja had [a theory about the broth= erhood of the semen keepers](3D"=) I am Tom Joad's Complete Lack of= Surprise predicted the nex= t group the sperm retainers will join adamatari's&n= bsp;[grandfather managed to escape from a N= ative American boarding school](3D") CSB Sunday Morning: [A brush with fame](3D") = Smart: LineNoise had [a couple of memorable encounters with Val Kilmer](3D" Funny: Gulper Eel got stom= ped by Ray Charles CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thr= ead for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekl= y topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please&n= bsp;[contact Farkback](3D") ahead of time, or just [submit it](3D" on S= aturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning = threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarante= e they will be. Politics Funny: Rev.K = pointed out that [Joe Biden is faili= ng as president](3D"https:=) Rev.K [celebrated news that the Manhattan D.A. is considering criminal charge= s against the Trump Organization](3D" cretinbob told us= [what will happen now that Rudy Giuli= ani's law license has been suspended](3D") RasIanI imagi= ned [how it feels to get smacked down = by Jen Psaki](3D"=) wejash came up with [a name for Donald Trump's recent rally](3D") = Politics Smart: sinner4ever had a theory on = [why Joe Manchin eventually supported the F= or the People Act](3D") Pocket Ninja shared some informa= tion about [the source of the video of= Trump supporters protesting Kamala Harris in El Paso](3D".=) weddin= gsinger went over a defense= of not getting vaccinated for COVID-19 AtomPeepers = > [saw the ultimate metaphor for Florida= a> edmo explained to](3D")[people spreading conspiracy theories on Trump's behalf why they're gettin= g unwanted reactions](3D" Top= Contest Entries Some of the top-voted contest entries fr= om last week, listed from highest number of votes down Photoshop= s: RedZoneTuba created [a portal for searching for Fark memes](3D" Yammering_= Splat_Vector [whipped up a storm=](3D"https=) Hyperbolic Hyperbole showed us [how Google should celebrate Fark](3D") Yammeri= ng_Splat_Vector [adapted an anima= tion from James Curran](3D"ht=) clovercat shared evidence t= hat [the real estate market is out of = control](3D"=) RedZoneTuba did [the= thing with the woman making bull horns with her fingers](3D" RedZoneTuba did the distr= acted boyfriend thing RedZoneTuba did [the "blown away" guy Maxell ad thing](3D") Herb Utsmelz [threw another bo= at parade from Trump](3D"ht=) Yammering_Splat_Vector found&= nbsp;[a bug whose sound blows crickets and = cicadas away](3D") Captions: From [Caption this boaty conversation](3D" Keyser_Soze_Death = [warned about an uninvited audien= ce](3D"=) markie_farkie had [a common maritime misunderstanding](3D" gopher321 = ng> overheard [some good ol' country c= lub happiness](3D"https://w=) Fartist Friday: [Haikus about springtime](3D") dothemath [yelled at clouds](3D") Fartist Friday will= be taking the week off, but will return next week Farktography:= > [Summer fun](3D") Wrongo = ng> gave us [a Superior sunset](3D"=) = Fark Parties = Friday, July 9, 2021: [Buffalo, NY Fark Party](3D"h=) (with all public health guidance c= arefully followed) Fark Weir= d News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy= ) Another fun time on last week's Quiz, and my gutter project i= s coming in nicely between the heavy rains and ridiculous heat. On the Quiz= itself, JasonOfOrillia is our sole entrant into the 1000 = club with a score of 1003 and so gets to sample my made-from-scratch Maple = Bacon Ice Cream. Denjiro made second with 969, HighwayBill came in third with 945, WoolyManwich= trong> made fourth with 927, and Wizzywig finished ou= t the top five with 916. The hardest question on last week's Hard Qu= iz was about those wacky Aussies and how they celebrate not being killed by= everything around them by ordering from Domino's. Only 34% of quiztakers k= new that Salmon, roast pumpkin, and broccoli are now available as pizz= a toppings, which I imagine are perfect for losing a bet or when you're ord= ering for someone who you despise so much that pineapple just won't cut it.= Their [Salmon &= amp; Prawn Supreme](3D"=) actually sounds interesting, as it's on a cr&eg= rave;me fraiche base rather than tomato sauce, and I really wouldn't mind t= rying the [Cr= ispy BBQ Peking Duck & Bacon](3D"=). The easiest question on last w= eek's Hard Quiz was about what happened on June 6, 1944. 84% of quiztakers = recognized it as the day Allied forces embarked on the Great Crusade of the= D-Day invasion, freeing France from Hitler's forces and resulting in a hug= e morale boost from the better food. Until Domino's came along and made piz= za with [mutton sausage= a> and](3D"=)[potatoes](3D"=). The hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about which fast food j= oint was trolling Chick-fil-A by donating money for every chicken sandwich = sold during Pride Month to pro-LGBTQ+ causes. Only 49% knew that Burger Kin= g wanted to also be the Chicken Sandwich King this month, with 40 cents of = every chicken sandwich sold going to The Human Rights Campaign. In case you= 're curious, they have Burger King in Australia, but they call it [Hungry Jack's](3D") and they put [bacon a= nd avocado on their chicken sandwiches](3D"). The easiest question on = last week's Easy Quiz was about a new cross-promotion breakfast cereal. 85%= of quiztakers knew that Lucky Charms were temporarily Loki Charms in a Dis= ney cross-promotion. I'm not sure what comes on pizza in Asgard or the TVA,= but if that leprechaun is back in Ireland for his time off, he's probably = eating the same stuff we get at Domino's here in the US, like the [C= hicken Taco Pizza or Cheeseburger Pizza](3D"), the latter of which has mustar= d on it for some godforsaken reason. If you missed out on last week'= s Quiz, you can [make up for it](3D"https:/=) now that you know a few= answers. Congratulations once again to the winners, and don't forget to ch= eck out [this week's Quiz](3D"=). --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click her= e to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1713, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1625081253-58516-54911--