Fark NotNewsletter: Retiring? OhFark!

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1621451416-6350-55097 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [ 34719](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message = from Drew Curtis: ____________________= ____ Hey everyone, hope your week's been going well. I'= m taking my younger two kids to get vaccinated later today. It's pretty wei= rd having them so excited about getting a shot. Storm got his back when old= er kids got cleared. Speaking of which, want to feel old? He's = going to be able to vote in the next election. Which in Kentucky = ;will probably be for city dog-catcher and town drunk. No, I'm not ru= nning. At 7 p.m. Thursday - the [Fark News Li= vestream](3D") returns! I think even if we didn't have time constraints= I'd probably still want to stick to the once a week schedule - gives me an= entire week to find the 10-15 best stories. Added bonus this week - = one of them is a link we posted on Fark, but I don't know how many people s= aw it. It's a huge deal for medical science. Find out which one= it is on the stream Thursday night. Added bonus: I've heard from a = bunch of folks they'd love us to do another Fark Movie Night on the livestr= eam again. Sounds like Dallan can definitely do one a month - next on= e is tentatively Friday, June 4, movie TBA. Also, sometime this week= we'll be testing a new Google native unit. As per usually, you won't= notice if you have [TotalFark](3D"https://=) or [BareFark](3D" (s= ign up today!). If you see it, however, just a heads up that it's gon= na look a little weird. We've got a formatting issue with it, which w= e're trying to decide if it's worth fixing or not. So we're going to = run it for the day, and if it moves the needle, we'll work on making it loo= k better. If it doesn't, then we'll never speak of it again. Me= anwhile, subscriptions really do keep the lights on around here. I lo= ve popping into the comments and seeing so many TotalFark and BareFark badg= es. Speaking of badges, it's finally time for us to think about reti= ring the selling of the [OhFark pandemic badge](3D"http=). We haven't settle= d on a date yet, but the quarantine is looking like it's all but over in th= e U.S. - at least 'til next fall when all the unbelievers kick off another&= nbsp;wave amongst themselves. Get vaccinated, folks! Anyhow, [O= hFark is still available for purchase](3D" but soon we will stop selling it= for good - but it'll remain next to your login forever. Get yours no= w! ________________________ We now return you to your usual F= ark NotNewsletter. ________________________ Top Comments Some of the to= p-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week Funny:= vudukungfu saw an invitation to [share stories about doing dumb things in the mil= itary](3D") sniderman had a photo of [the backup system of Colonial Pipeline's computer networ= k](3D") Oysterman shared [an unaltered version of the photo Dax Shepard posted of Kristen Bel= l doing nude yoga](3D" FormlessOne envisioned [a discussion that a 2-year-old who shot his pa= rents will soon be having](3D") bearded clamorer was gla= d to see [an article about portable ge= nerators](3D"=) bearded clamorer had suspicions about&nbs= p;[the story about the toddler shooting hi= s parents](3D") Clarence Brown thought about [why The Sun agreed to take a reporter back after= he killed his wife if he remained confined to his office](3D") Ev= il Mackerel recognized [the = ornate staircase in a real estate listing](3D" grokca t= ook offense at [The Sun being called o= ut for writing a long obituary for one of their reporters without mentionin= g that he murdered his wife](3D"https://=) question_dj explained&= nbsp;[why Colonial Pipeline paid ransom to = hackers instead of using the backups they had](3D") Lokilaw20= 12 let us know what people = on Mount Everest in a photo that poorjon posted&= nbsp;[were talking about](3D") Sma= rt: Pocket Ninja shared a story about [accidentally walking into a vegetarian restauran= t](3D") Sword and Shield reacted to [Massachusetts State Police troopers complaining they can'= t live on $94,000 a year](3D") grumpfuff told us [the best reason to keep wearing masks indefi= nitely](3D") Nuuu [perfo= rmed a death-defying stunt right before our very eyes](3D" Wartho= g defended [Dartmouth Medica= l School students who have been accused of cheating during online exams](3D"ht=)= Tyrosine shared a story to illustrate that [no matter how talented you are, people will eve= ntually yeet you into the sun if you're too hard to work with](3D") vudukungfu saw an invitation to [share stories about doing dumb things in the military](3D" edmo had a suggestion for dealing with people like [the guy who keeps buying Teslas and riding in= the back while they drive themselves](3D") Politics Funny:Irving Maimway let us know [what Ben Garrison was on about in a recent comic](3D" King Something explained [w= hy it was okay if the audit servers in Arizona were connected to a Wi-Fi ro= uter](3D" Driver came up with [a way to get unvaccinated people to wear masks](3D" = snocone was flustered by [a = big lie about the Big Lie](3D" Angry Drunk Bureaucrat l= et Shostie know [what to expect at Ben Garrison's "Woke Disney"](3D" Politics Sm= art: narocroc speculated on [the reason the CDC announced a loosening of guidelines for= fully vaccinated people](3D") another one of them liste= d [some of the consequences of the "no= rmal tourist visit" at the Capitol on January 6](3D") hubiestubert= looked at [Tomi Lahren's cl= aims that she was harassed over the weekend](3D"ht=) Dodo David = ong> described [how good churches have= handled the pandemic](3D"https://=) FormlessOne figured [Trumpism is not an extreme ideology anymore= a> Top Contest Entries= span> Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed f= rom highest number of votes down Photoshops: wes= t.la.lawyer gave this fellow [a sign of love instead of hate](3D" Yammering_Splat_Vector = rong> replaced this message with [one = of surprising self-awareness](3D" Mojongo [didn't want Farkers to end up like this poor guy](3D") zeon [brought back a cla= ssic protest](3D"http=) Kick The Chair [skipped too many leg days](3D" RedZoneTuba = [helped this man be more honest with himsel= f and others](3D") Circusdog320 [had a message for proud idiots](3D" Kick The Chair = ong> gave these models [a look that ne= ver goes out of style](3D"=) clovercat found [a rodent in the Capitol](3D") zeon = ong> [snatched a new body for this squirrel=](3D") Fartist Friday: [Design a new galaxy](3D") Diocletian's Last Cabbage [painted a galaxy for PC users](3D" This week's Fartist Fri= day theme, brought to you by E-brake: World = ;Turtle Day is this weekend. In homage to the epic Fark "[I Saw A Turtle](3D")" thread of yore, we present: = "I Draw A Turtle." We'll be F'Artisting up the classic "[Tippy The Turtle](3D"https:=)" dra= wing (from [this = ;contest](3D"), for you whippersnappers). Using any medium, add on to Ti= ppy's drawing, or use a Draw program to create your own "Tippy The Turtle" Farktography: [Happy Farktography Anniversary 16](=3D") beerrun = rong> took [a beautiful photo from up = in the air](3D".=) Fark Parties Friday, July 9, 2021: [Buffalo, NY Fark Party](3D") (with all public= health guidance carefully followed) Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox= 45tallboy) Another fun time on the Quiz this week, where we= learned that a Roomba without googly eyes is merely a floor duster with no= personality. On the Quiz itself, kjlopey came out on top = with 987, followed by the_colonel in second with 966 = and Russell_Secord in third with 931. PT= P_Professor made fourth with 922, and Oliver Twisted rounds out the top 5 with 905, The hardest question on the = Hard Quiz was about which 1,454 ft. tall national landmark was officially o= pened from the White House by then-President Herbert Hoover. Only 35% of qu= iztakers knew that it was the Empire State Building which was lit up for th= e first time when Hoover flipped the switch. For the record, Boulder Dam wa= s formally dedicated by President Franklin Roosevelt in person in 1936 (aft= er which he headed to Las Vegas, because hey, Vegas), and is a mere 726.4 f= t. in height. The carving of Mount Rushmore National Monument stopped= in 1941, although each figure received its own dedication. The mountain it= self is 5,725 ft. above sea level, and each face is approximately 60 ft. hi= gh. The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was about those wacky Japa= nese and how the town of Noto in Ishikawa Province spent several million ye= n of COVID relief money. 83% of quiztakers knew that the town decided what = would really get their tourism jumpstarted would be a giant statue of a squ= id. I mean, the town really is known for its squid, and you can bet that mo= re than one American town would go for a statue of Optimus Prime if they th= ought they could get away with it. The hardest question on this week= 's Easy Quiz was about which Oscar-winning artist was going back on tour in= Europe in 2022. Only 50% of quiztakers recognized that "Tuskegee" was the = last studio album by the artist from Tuskegee, AL - Lionel Richie. Richie t= ook home an Oscar for Best Original Song for "Say You, Say Me: featured in = the film "White Nights". I mean, pretty much no one saw the film about a Ru= ssian ballet dancer, so it's understandable that no one remembers it won an= Oscar. Interesting note - the song did not appear on the soundtrack due to= licensing issues. The easiest question on this week's Easy Quiz was= about the return of pizza nemesis The Noid and which pizza chain will help= you avoid him. 88% of quiztakers remembered him from Domino's commercials = - and the several video games titles released by the chain. Personally, I a= lways thought the Little Caesar's guy could take him, but back then Little = Caesar's never took the fight to him by avoiding delivery altogether. If you missed out on the Quiz last week, you can [catch u= p on the Fark Weird News Quiz here](3D". Congratulations to the winners, and= we'll do it all again this week.](3D") --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click her= e to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1713, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1621451416-6350-55097--