Fark NotNewsletter: Person, beaver, dam, satellite, TV

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1597252470-32891-56429 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [ 5145](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message = from Drew Curtis: ____________________= ____ Hey everyone, hope your week went well. A feature I've wanted to do for awhile is a weekly news cycle meta-analys= is in the NotNewsletter, which would be sort-of taking the pulse of the new= s cycle in general. The problem has been that up until recently, thin= gs were locked into a COVID-19 centric cycle that didn't change much at all= since mid-March, until probably about two weeks ago. As for the cur= rent news cycle meta, for the past week, pre-covid weird news has been cree= ping back into the cycle on a daily basis. I don't know if this is be= cause furloughs at news outlets are on the decline or if Florida Man has ju= st decided to pick up the slack lately. For example, I don't think Mo= nday's excellent article from the CBC about [= why there are satellite dishes on beaver dams all across Canada](3D" would s= ee the light of day during a COVID-heavy news cycle. The sports news = meta cycle seems very much on edge with the prospect of no college sports t= his fall. The politics meta seems ready to take the rest of the week = off before convention season starts in earnest next week. A quick ho= usekeeping note: We're rejiggering subscriptions on Fark - now [To= talFark](3D" includes the no-ads experience of [BareFark](3D". P= rices are also going up for the first time in 20 years, however we're not c= hanging them until August 19th. So if you've ever thought about subsc= ribing, you have one week to lock in at current subscription rates. F= or more info on that and other changes, [see last week's= NotNewsletter](3D"). One feature of TotalFark that I have= n't done a good job of communicating is that TotalFarkers can impact what l= inks get posted on main Fark. A great example of this happened just y= esterday when [Biden = announced that Harris was his VP pick](3D"=). I try to wait about 10-15 = minutes to allow enough time for the best headline to be submitted. W= e got our first candidate about 5 minutes in, and a second candidate 5 minu= tes after that (incidentally submitted by the same person, which is cool).&= nbsp; I waited a little longer, redlit all but those two links, and then wa= tched TotalFarkers up/down vote the two links. The winning headline e= nded up being the one with the most votes. This isn't an automatic th= ing that happens, I still manually greenlit the headline in the end - and i= f I'd had a strong preference I would have chosen it regardless of voting (= unless the vote tallies were enormous, which does happen). But I was = fine with either, and voting determined the eventual winner. This tends to happen quite a lot, and it was only last month when a fr= iend of mine pointed out that this is a hugely awesome feature of TotalFark= that hardly anyone knows about. So aside from a no-ads experience, a= side from the fact that prices are going up in a week, aside from the great= community and early notice about Fark features, you also get the opportuni= ty to impact what goes on Fark's main page. [Sign up today= a>! At 5 p.m. Eastern today, it's the Fark News Livestream! Mo= re interesting fallout from the Russian vaccine announcement yesterday, an = update on how Sturgis-19 is going (not well), and more Yobs In The News.&nb= sp; Join us 5 p.m. on](3D" Twitch channel](3D"h=). ________________________ We now return you to your usual F= ark NotNewsletter. ________________________ Top Comments Some of the to= p-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week Funny:= LionHound had one question after [watching a video of the fire and subsequent explosion= in Beirut](3D") John the Magnificent showed [someone taking blame for the Beirut explosion](3D")= SurelyShirley helpfully explained [what could cause a red cloud like the one in Beirut](3D")Nimbull was [thinki= ng about fast food](3D" hobnail spotted [a symbolic number](3D") scottydoesntknow = trong> summed up [a deadly guacamole-ma= king machine explosion](3D"https:=) Dahnkster wasn't too worried about Ray Park not reprising the rol= e of Darth Maul for Disney+ Straight Outta Wells Branch = rong> remarked on [the devastation in= Beirut](3D"https=) SoundOfOneHandWanking could understand&nbs= p;[the risks that a Sturgis Motorcycle Ral= ly attendee thought were worth taking](3D") Abe Vigoda's Ghost = trong> showed that [NEDM= ng> was not pointing out the remains of a destroyed ship](3D"http=) Bon= us FarkStaff Pick: Al Roker's Forecast explained&= nbsp;[the main problem with putting a snake = in your washing machine](3D") Smart: bloobeary = trong> listed [a great year for movies, though the films mentioned did not all fit within the limitations ment= ioned in the headline phalamir pointed out that when dumb people do foolish things, it doesn= 't always mean what you might think it does](3D"https://w=) weddingsinger = strong> argued that [it does so mean wh= at you might think it means](3D"htt=) blastoh compared = [reactions to plans being canceled because o= f the coronavirus](3D") AsparagusFTW [hopefully isn't a firefighter](3D") Bovine Diarrhea V= irus discussed [being able = to go out safely](=3D" but I'm not sure you want to take the word of another= virus farkingismybusiness noticed [people picking and choosing their safety rules](3D") = Znuh gave us an [update on h= ow things are going 137 days after being released from being hospitalized f= or COVID-19](=3D" Tell Me How My Blog Tastes figured&nbs= p;[things might've worked out really well = for people who didn't properly social distance at a funeral](3D") = TotalFark Discussion: Note: This section can only be accessed by [TotalFarkers](3D") Funny: libranoelrose = trong> showed [what was about to happen= to Badafuco's unsteady floor](3D"https://w=) Smart & Funny= : we'refromthesamestory explained [why there's no such thing as womansplaining](3D") F= unny: thealgorerhythm had some [bad news for Badafuco](3D") Smart:= m> Beeblebrox asked [the question that keeps us all up at night](3D" Smart: = Ponzholio thought a story ab= out a TotalFarker's friend's husband sounded really familiar Fun= ny: buttercat had a different idea of [what's causing a floor to buckle](3D") Poli= tics Funny: fluffy_pope could imagine [how it feels to interview Donald Trump](3D") propasaurus came up with [a startling diagnosis](3D" ecmoRandomNumbers figured = out [why Trump was carrying a stack of = papers and newspapers](3D"=) Learned Hand Job thought&nbs= p;[perhaps someone's name was based on the= ir conception after all](3D") Noticeably F.A.T. explaine= d [why Trump might've visited Walter Re= ed Medical Center again](3D") Politics Smart: OldR= od looked at [how Trump is tr= ying to win the election during a pandemic](3D"=) markie_farkie = trong> shared [what a physical therapis= t said about Trump's gait](3D"https://w=) Garza and the Supermutants = g> compared [the portion of the world p= opulation that's American to the percentage of COVID-19 deaths in Amer= ica](3D"=) propasaurus figured [Trump should be measured by the standards he wants to impose on= others](3D" thatguyoverthere70 came up with [this one weird trick to turn elderly Americans ag= ainst Trump](3D") Top Contest = Entries Some of the top-voted contest entries from last w= eek, listed from highest number of votes down Photoshops:Snubnose [made Roadrunne= r cartoons defy physics in a whole new way](3D=) Yammering_Splat_V= ector gave [each Devo member = their own convention center](3D"ht=) Yammering_Splat_Vector = made [passing out in your bathroom a l= ot more comfortable](3D".=) Nothing To See Here [gave Raquel some better dinosaur protection](3D") Alligator showed us that [Space Force is already developing new weapons](3D" verchad = trong> [made one of Superman's enemies infin= itely more frightening](3D") Yammering_Splat_Vector reco= rded [a modern remake of "Abbey Road"= a> Herb Utsmelz reminded us](3D"=)[not to text while walking](3D" Alligator wa= s [sharing Sharon's outlook on the topi= c of disease](3D") Yammering_Splat_Vector discovered tha= t [love is in the air](3D") Ca= ptions: From ["Caption = Snow White donating blood"](3D"https:/=): gopher321 knew&nb= sp;[who Snow White is donating to](3D") dionysusaur revealed [the less altruistic reason she's donating](3D" Fartist Friday:= em> [Add a beer to a classic work of art](3D")= Be sure to check out the great entries from this contest. = Alligator submitted the winning work o'fart with [a brewing fog](3D") This week's Fartist = Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: In hono= r of "Chant At The Moon Day," create an ode to our enigmatic satellite= the moon in the form of a Haiku Farktography: Fa= rktography Contest No. 796: "[City Life](3D=)"= ended in a tie between Earguy's [view inside Greektown, Detroit](3D") and Ciliar= ySpasm's [reflection on a cl= oud](3D"https=) Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you wo= uld like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact [Elsinore](3D"). Fa= rk Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy= strong>) Another fun and educational time on the Quiz last week= , marred by a few technical issues which I'm gonna say were my fault. But i= nteresting improper fractions aside, still fun. Because of the scoring issu= es, here's last week's top ten: Blackstone - = 1125 NM Volunteer - 1073 TheMothership= ng> - 1072 bingethinker - 1002 SoundOfOneHan= dWanking - 995 i.r.id10t - 915 Liza= rdOnAStick - 914 Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs - = 898 Recoil Therapy - 898 Autoerotic Defenest= ration - 896 The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was over= our more-in-the-news-than-a-diplomat-shoul d-be US Envoy Harry Harri= s, who just shaved his mustache last week. Only 32% of Quiztakers knew = ;that he served in South Korea, who lived under Imperial Japanese colonial = rule prior to World War II, and whose "governor-generals" tended to wear mu= staches. I guess it's one of those things where maybe you should be mindful= of local customs when representing a foreign government. No word yet on sa= les figures for his latest K-Pop track. The easiest question on the = Hard Quiz was over advice offered by firefighters in Charlotte County, FL a= fter responding to a call in the parking lot of the local Culver's restaura= nt. 77% of quiztakers knew that "Don't drive with a burning candle in your = car" is great advice that we all kinda knew - at least those of us not from= Florida. Get one of those tree thingies for your rearview mirror like norm= al folks. The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was over a Georgia T= ech researcher's effort to create new music using Artificial Intellige= nce. Only 54% of quiztakers knew that he was receiving copyright takedown n= otices for music he had created with his program and uploaded under the nam= e "Weird A.I. Yankovic". I'm guessing the entire music industry just let of= f a gigantic "wait, we can do that? And not pay the actual artists and song= writers?" and will soon offer to take this useless-to-him technology off hi= s hands for a modest sum. The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was = over where Tom Hanks and Rita Hayworth have recently put down roots as lega= l citizens. 80% of quiztakers knew that they have produced films like "My B= ig Fat Greek Wedding" about Greek culture as well as "Mama Mia" and "My Lif= e in Ruins", which were filmed in the Mediterranean nation. Best of luck an= d lots of feta cheese and olives to the happy couple. If you missed = out on last week's Quiz, you can [catch up on it right here. Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this w= eek.](3D" --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click her= e to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1713, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1597252470-32891-56429--