Fark NotNewsletter: Because you love change, we're making changes to Fark subscriptions

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1596664511-79459-15203 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Facebook"](3D") [=3D"Twitter"](3D") [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [ 7293](3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message = from Drew Curtis: ____________________= ____ Hello Farkers: A bit of business news: Fark i= s reorganizing our subscription membership tiers. In part this is due to fe= edback we received during our recent tests. The cost of doing busine= ss has gone up since we first launched subscriptions in early 2002 and we'r= e bringing our membership fees in line with 2020, as well as streamlining BareFark and [TotalFark](3D"http=) features. Membership= Tiers We've heard you! All paying members now get the ad-free exper= ience. [TotalFark](3D"=) - Effective immediately, TotalFark i= ncludes the BareFark ad-free experience. You also get live access to = all content, all submitted links, and the entire Fark community. Add= itional features include the ability to influence editorial decisions on li= nks via voting, access to TotalFark discussions away from the prying eyes o= f social media and search engines, full access to two decades of archived n= onsense, and first looks at upcoming Fark features, such as the much-reques= ted swear jar allowing TotalFarkers both the ability and the discretion to = drop an occasional F-bomb. BareFark - Ad-free access to = Fark's basic content and the public areas of the Fark community with an ad-= free experience. Get the basics and never see another weird t-shirt ad agai= n! Farker - Ad-supported access to Fark's basic content and the= public areas of the Fark community. New pricing takes effect August= 19, two weeks from today: $100 for the year for the [Total= Fark Membership](3D". This includes a bonus [Farks2Give](3D" worth one mo= nth of TotalFark. Use it on yourself or give it to someone else. There will= also be an option to pay monthly at $10 per month. $50 for the year= for [BareFark Membership](3D"). There will also be an option to= pay monthly at $5 per month. The yearly memberships work out to $8.= 33 and $4.16 per month, respectively. What else? $10 for one = [Farks2Give](3D"). Existing Farks2Give will be treated like Forever = Stamps and will be worth 1 month of TotalFark regardless of what price was = paid for them Current pricing remains in effect until Aug 19th, so i= f you're looking for a reason to sign up for [TotalFark](3D" or [BareFark](3D"), this is it. Current memberships will continue as is unti= l renewed. Also since BareFark is now included in TotalFark, we'll b= e issuing a blanket unsubscribe for BareFark for folks who have both subscr= iptions. If we miss anyone, contact us via [FarkBack](3D" and let us know.= ________________________ We now return you to your usual Far= k NotNewsletter. ________________________ Top Comments Some of the top-= voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week Funny:= em> EvilEgg's [mom = does not accept returns](3D" WGJ [got excited and showed a nipple](3D" HeathenHealer = strong> noted [problems when a man was = arrested for taunting cops with a doughnut](3D"https://w=) rattchett = g> had [a special message for Ryan Reyn= olds](3D"=) Bootleg worried about [a wing walker who replaced a plane's missing tire mid-fligh= t](3D") WordsnCollision knew [where the idea for the rolling machine workout came from= a> thealgorerhythm revealed](3D" tricked people with damaged mushrooms into thinking masks a= re dangerous](3D" I Ate Shergar sang about [some of the 50 ways to get COVID-19](3D") Nadie_AZ gave a [warning abo= ut a video of Charlize Theron taking it all off](=3D" PainInTheASP= reacted to [mask advice from= Cary Elwes](3D"h=) Smart: luna1580 consid= ered [people claiming mental illness af= ter being caught behaving badly](3D"=) Dead for Tax Reasons = g> made [an important point about weari= ng masks that many people seem to be overlooking](3D"=) Xai = g> discussed [walking on eggshells arou= nd cops to avoid problems](3D"=) eagles95 shared a story = about [running into an angry anti-maske= r in the wild](3D".=) Dead for Tax Reasons [explained to Florida why it pays to choose your battles wi= sely](3D") Therion told us [what it was like to work with Cary Elwes](3D" Louisiana_S= itar_Club showed [how innovat= ive a new exercise machine is](=3D" maddan predicted&nbs= p;[a horrific accident with an exercise ma= chine](3D") RoyFokker'sGhost discussed [the differences between Marvel and DC movies](3D") JesseL revealed [the sec= ret recipe for success](3D" CSB Sunday Morning: [Summer jobs](3D") Smart: Co= rdycepsInYourBrain discovered that [sometimes we're too hard on ourselves](3D" Funny:= GRCooper's friend [figured out how= to get GRCooper to do all the driving](3D"=) CSB= [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true sto= ries from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea= for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please [contact Farkback](3D" ahead = of time, or just [submit it](3D"https:=) on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please n= ote: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of b= eing greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be. TotalFark Dis= cussion: Note: This section can only be accessed by [TotalF= arkers](3D" Funny: meg12279 discovered = that [Mom has been known to party](3D"=)Funny: sarahthustra thought [a lawyer might have a vested interest in advising agains= t reporting an ex's LEGO counterfeiting](3D") Smart: merr= illvillain has [an unusual = fetish](=3D" Funny: Brawndo made [a cover for meg12279's autobiograph= y](3D") Smart: Murflette knew [what a Farker should do with an inherited house](3D") = Politics Funny: 40 degree day noted that&= nbsp;[Herman Cain got to do something import= ant to him before he died](3D") thealgorerhythm was = ;[shocked to discover something about Alan D= ershowitz](3D") winedrinkingman wanted to know [exactly what Herman Cain's death means for the = Republican Party](3D") Mike_LowELL [enjoyed a snack break](3D" RodneyToady [used a Fark headline to remember some important= words](3D") GreatGlavinsGhost noticed [something inappropriate in blastoh's c= omment](3D") Politics Smart: Benevolent Misanthrop= e [thought about the attentio= n Dr. Stella Immanuel is getting](3D"=) bloobeary shared&= nbsp;[expectations for the upcoming U.S. pre= sidential election](3D") King Something [mostly got it right when taking a guess on a Trump backtrac= k](3D") weddingsinger had [faint praise for Antonio Sabato Jr.](3D" Badmoodman = ng> [reassured Erick Erickson that Republica= ns would never do the terrible thing Obama did](3D") Note: Fa= rkers had a lot to say about Herman Cain's death, mainly having to d= o with the unfortunate politicization of COVID-19 and attempts to mitigate = its spread, and the fact that Cain died after making a show of being carele= ss about protecting himself and others from the virus. Top Contest Entries Some of th= e top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of v= otes down Photoshops: hail2daking foun= d [the Beatles' forgotten album](3D") = hail2daking showed us [a long-awaited Meat Loaf follow-up album](3D" Thrakkorzog = ong> made an [antisocial Zoom backgroun= d for teachers to use](3D"=) Yammering_Splat_Vector disco= vered [this girl can magically make a s= ongbird disappear](3D".=) Driver's [Zoom background is technically safe for work, but you might wa= nt to be careful](3D") Nothing To See Here found out&nbs= p;[pyro kids can come in handy](3D") RedZoneTuba's [school bus = had a surreal side mirror](=3D" Thrakkorzog showed that&= nbsp;[this rodent band should get gentler ro= adies](3D") kabloink [mad= e a Milton trap](3D" Pfighting Polish found [the perfect entertainment for the Catali= na Wine Mixer](3D") Fartist Friday: [Show and tell, volume 2](3D")JustToLetYouKnowFriend built [a chest suitable for dungeons and/or dragons](3D" Thi= s week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Use a Photoshop or paint/draw program to upgrade a classical= work of art by adding a beer Farktography: Earg= uy [loaded up on carbs](3D"=) to win&= nbsp;[Farktography Contest No. 795:= "I Swear I Seed It"](3D") Farktography is Fark's weekly photography c= ontest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact&n= bsp;[Elsinore](3D"=). Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy) Another great time with the Quiz this week= , and it seems I'm not the only one who gave up on Battletoads back in the = NES day. On the Quiz itself, four folks get tickets to our socially distant= 1000 outdoor club area. Evildog takes top honors wit= h 1019, followed by Booklet juuuust behind in second = with 1018. Auntie Cheesus takes third with 1009, edmo in fourth with 1004, and bobobolinskii= ng> finishes out the top five with 956. The hardest question on the = Hard Quiz was about what led a Yorktown, NY man to fire his .22 rifle in hi= s hallway in such a manner that the bullets wound up in his neighbor's bath= room while she was showering. Only 26% of quiztakers knew that he had decid= ed he had a need for some target practice. No word on his skills relating t= o the actual targets he was shooting at, but I'm guessing he probably didn'= t receive the best firearm instruction available so the beer cans likely we= nt to the recycler whole. The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was = over who'll be fighting an exhibition match with boxing great Roy Jones Jr.= 71% of quiztakers knew that the 51-year-old would be fighting 54-year-old = Mike Tyson in a match I'll be happy to make fun of, but not where either of= those guys can hear. For comparison, Sylvester Stallone filmed Ro= cky Balboa in late 2005 through 2006 when he was 59 years old, portray= ing a character of about that same age. The hardest question on the = Easy Quiz was over the new scholarship being offered by the humanist group = The Satanic Temple. Only 55% of quiztakers knew that applicants were being = asked to write an essay about their worst teacher to be considered for the = Devil's Advocate scholarship. I think the ultimate irony would be awarding = the scholarship to someone attending Liberty University, as I believe not a= single person in either organization is gonna want to handle that= paperwork. The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over how = NBC's Today anchor Savannah Guthrie was injured last fall, re= sulting in her having cataract surgery last week. 92% knew that it was from= a toy train owned by her son. Having babysat for my nephew for a while, I = can tell you that you should never trust Thomas the Tank Engine. Take a les= son from Sir Topham Hatt and keep that one in Tidmouth Sheds where he can d= o less damage. If you missed last week's Quiz, you can [catch up on it here](3D"). Congratulations once again to the winners, and = we'll be doing it all again this week. --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") from newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click her= e to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1713, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1596664511-79459-15203--