Fark NotNewsletter: What's Up With The News Sites?

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1720646041-22114-10571 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [(3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message= from Drew Curtis: ________________________ Hey everyone hope your week has been well.= Having July 4th land on a Thu= rsday last has totally messed me up. I don't know what day it is.&nbs= p; I don't know what month it is. To make matters worse, my neighbors= also celebrated the 5th of July, the 6th of July, the 7th of July, and at = least one of them celebrated the 8th of July. I went to bed early las= t night so no idea what happened. It doesn't get dark here until clos= e to 10pm. Congrats to the Far= ktography community for reaching 1000 contests. That's like 13 Rhode = Islands I think. Do yourself a favor and check out[#1000](3D") = this week, and scroll through the older ones too. Awesome to see so many years of creativity and skill. &n= bsp;Nice work and great milestone! Th= ursday at 4pm eastern it's the [Fark News Liv= estream](3D")! It'll definitely be me and= Dill, and possibly Christine if she gets power, cellular, and internet bac= k. Combine a sucky Texas power grid with a tropical storm and you get= power outage chaos. It was so bad the power company's outage map sto= pped working. Just imagine if they get hit by a hurricane. Dill= got hit by the same storm in Indiana yesterday. Anyhow this week, it= appears to be Hand Grenades In The News week for whatever reason. Al= so Gay Furry Hackers strike again, and Cocaine Hippos made it back into the= news cycle as well. And we'v= e just added a new guest for tomorrow's livestream: Farker, guitar collecto= r, burrito lover, and Hugo Award Winner John Scalzi will be on. Join = us! ________________________ End Drew = g> transmission ________________________ Top Comments Some of the top-voted smarte= st and funniest comments from the past week. If your post isn't here, as= sume that NotNewsletterMonkey couldn't think of a tagline.= (The [Smartest and](3D"=)[Funniest for the past month are found elsewhere.) Funny: -&n= bsp;fifthofzen](3D"=)[knows why some people bring mechanized san= ders on airplanes.](=3D" - Dr.Fey[: "Pretty Nazis Go= ne Wild in 2024!"](3D") - WickerNipple[knows the cur= se of being from Tennessee. Not that there's anything wrong with that.](3D")- GardenWeasel[came up with a rare meaning for "AI= ."](3D" Smart: - NewportBarGuy[jus= t wants a feel-good movie for once.](3D") - luidprand= >[found a way to watch Forrest Gump without hating it.](3D") - DannyBrandt[: "I mean, that probably happens. Right?"](3D"https=) -&n= bsp;SpectroBoy[knows that Texas has its own weather predi= ctor. Just like the groundhog.](=3D" - Captain Orr[r= eally, really should look into getting a passport.](3D") - Si= n_City_Superhero[believes they know who really wanted the old TV c= able "bundles."](3D"htt=) - Super Chronic[realized the m= essage behind why Chase started ending free checking accounts.](3D") = [Politics](3D") It was not a good week for laughs in the Politics tab. = Politics Smart: - snowblur[discovered= a potential cause of CNN's rightward shift.](3D") - Obscure = Login[: "You are allowed to call out people, disagree with them and= still like it when they make good points."](3D"=) - New Risin= g Sun[thinks they know the reason people would talk about MAGA non= sense in public.](3D"=) - thecactusman17[shared their= political decision wishlist.](3D") - DannyBrandt[kn= ows the one thing everyone can agree on about Project 2025.](3D") - HugeMistake[detailed what they hope would happen if Harris = is nominated instead of Biden.](3D"h=) - Emposter[expl= ained why not to reflexively vote for 'change.'](3D") Monkey's Pick I felt these posts were exceptionally funny= or smart, even though they didn't get many votes. Warning: Unsorted, ma= y contain politics. Funny: - evilmrsock= trong>[debated the merits of bringing a chainsaw to a planejacking.](3D") = - centaur5ball[often confuses their range bag and sna= ke bag. Yes, snake bag.](3D" - nick_papagiorgio[see= s this assault as the setup for a soap opera.](3D") - grokca[: "Why do they hate freedom holes?"](3D"=) (scroll down for [images](3D")= ) Smart: - mrmopar5287[told the s= tory of a cousin that encountered ID problems.](3D") [CSB](3D" Sunday Morning theme = - "[When you helped a stranger](3D")" This week, Farkers= were challenged to share their random acts of kindness. [Funny](3D"): = - Porous Horace[witnessed a mugging in-process.](3D" pissnmoan's friend got shot for yodeling. - chewd[forgot something that would've made the re= scue a lot easier.](=3D" - The Pope of Manwich Village= g>[: "OK, I'll take two."](3D") [Smart](3D"): - Miss Ste= in[: "It's called being human, religion has nothing to do with it.= "](3D".=) - Cafe Threads[shared resources for a woman = and her family to get a place to stay.](3D" - vudukungfu= rong>[accidentally helped out an actual spy while dressed as an 1800s gypsy= .](3D") - gregario[met the person he donated marrow = to.](3D" Top Contest Entrie= s Some of the top-voted [contest](3D" entries from last week, sorted by how likely they a= re to still be open. Go send in your own submissions, they're fun even if y= ou don't get the most votes! [Photoshops](3D" Since there's= a lot of these, everybody (and every thread) gets one and only one. -&n= bsp;RedZoneTuba[beta-tested remote boxing.](=3D" - James_Corn[saw Punxsutawney Phil predict 6 more weeks of nu= clear winter.](3D"ht=) - Stephen_Falken[knows where the= se three little piggies ended up.](3D") - EvaDewer[f= ound where they filmed the Paramount logo.](3D") - Thoaar = >[fit in with the Peanuts gallery.](3D") - Yammering_Splat_Ve= ctor[painted the sky into the Utah state capitol ceiling.](3D"=) -= hammettmanshook the hand of a miniature man.- Surly U. Jest knows exactly where this Prada shop sho= uld go. - bathbone[was able to turn this fashi= on into a Ferrero Rocher publicity stunt with just a label.](3D" - Large Marge sent mefound a different Alien. - = ;Sensei Can You See[extrapolated this phallic doorhandle p= lacement to the woman's bathroom.](3D" - samsquatch= [poured themselves a nice big bowl of Pelican-Os. Almost like Night on th= e Galactic Railroad](3D") - nakmuay[shipped this st= ore clerk to a better location.](3D") - GoodDoctorB = recreated a Red Dead Redemption glitch they saw once. - Bumcheese[is playing cowboy.](3D"https://w=) - sdinter= g>[showed off this cool egg they found that totally won't hatch a facehugge= r.](3D") - Petite Mel[found where Phyllis Diller's t= ouring outfit wouldn't look out of place.](3D" - whatsupchuc= k[found the final piece of the ultra YMCA.](3D"=) - TxRabbit[knows why that horse reared up.](3D"=) - th= ealgorerhythm[thinks this woman might be Aphrodite.](3D"https:=) - = west.la.lawyer[had to cover up the slip.](=3D" [Captions](3D")= >: "[Caption this naptime at= the petting zoo](3D".=)" ([image](3D"https=)) - RedZoneTuba [can't g= et sleep, no.](3D") - skybird659 [spotted a kid nap atte= mpt.](3D" "[Caption this afternoon = on the back deck](3D"=)" ([image](3D"https=)) - Subtonic [discussed = strategy.](3D") - RedZoneTuba [knows the price to pay fo= r enjoying nice days.](3D" - Saturn5 [didn't get the cig= arettes they wanted.](3D") "Caption this serene drinking scene= a>" ([image](3D")) - RedZoneTuba [: " A guy walks into a ba= r carrying a duck. He tells the bartender he'd "like a scotch on the rocks"= . Next thing you know..."](3D" - BloddofArmok [had their = wish twisted by a vindictive genie.](3D") [Farktography theme:](3D" = "[The Journey of 1000 = Contests Begins with a Single Theme](3D".=)" This week, Farkers were given f= ree reign to choose from [Farktography's= past themes](3D"htt=), and post a photo that would fit one of those themes OR th= at they actually entered to that theme before. Oh, and they're allowed t= o post up to 10 entries, rather than the usual 3. - Linguin= e[viewed the sunrise from under a mesa arch.](3D"=) - Elsinore [captured the point where a droplet separates from its= tail.](3D"https:/=) - beerrun[remembered CillarySpa= sm's quick trip to the Twilight Zone.](3D" - markie= _farkie[must've visited Middle Earth to get this clear shot.](3D".=) [Upcoming Fark Parties](3D"=) It's easy to = plan for a Fark Party - you're effectively saying that "I'm going to be her= e at this time, come hang out." [Submit one!](=3D" [OCT. 12TH 7pm, 25th Anniversary Fark Party @ The Lyric Theatre](3D"=)= span> Fark Headlines of th= e Week A selection of some of the top headlines from last we= ek. [I'm Popeye the sailor man I'm trapped here upon the can](3D"=)= > [Darwin Award contestant declared winner after 30 minutes](3D"=)= [Happy Metric 4th of July](3D"=) [Sea lion charges ba= thers on popular California beach, presumably looking for civil discussion](3D")[Woodward guilty of hate crime murder of Bernstein](3D"=) = [Cu in hell](3D") [Australia orders the purge of thousand= s of sperm bank donations after almost half of its supply are found to be m= islabeled. I'd be careful drinking the water for the next few days](=3D") = Fark Weird News Quiz = n> (brought to you by ox45tallboy) Another fun time on = the Quiz last week, where we learned we've been barbecuing on the 4th of Ju= ly almost as long as we've been celebrating it. On the Quiz itself, freakingmoron came out on top with 1006, followed by Blanster in second with 992 and mrs. badcrumble= ong> in third with 946. MinorThreat1 made fourth with= 939, and Glockenspiel Hero made it into the top five= with 936. The hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about = which retailer is in the process of replacing their shopping carts with a n= ew design that features a cup holder and cell phone rack, However, they app= ear to have never been tested by people of below average height because the= y're difficult to push and can't be seen over. Only 41% of quiztakers knew = that Walmart doesn't seem to see the need for shorter people to see what is= in front of them and also believes that those of lesser stature can simply= toss their small children upwards and hope that they land in the cart= 's child seat. But it does alleviate the problem of customers heading to ch= eckout when their cart is full but they still have money to spend. = The easiest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about what video game pro= p can get you four months in prison in the UK. 87% of quiztakers knew that = a Warwickshire man was gonna do hard time for a 6" replica of the Master Sw= ord from Legend of Zelda. I mean, it could have been worse, he could have b= een a Final Fantasy fan with a life-size replica of one of their swords.&nb= sp; The hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about which r= estaurant chain was appealing to fans of Japanese anime with "special grade= garlic sauce" that comes with a free month of anime streamer Crunchyroll. = Only 52% of quiztakers knew that McDonald's was building on their anime pro= motion from earlier this year involving "WcDonald's" sauce, the restaurant = chain seen in several anime series. In the meantime, Rick and Morty fans ar= e still waiting on a mass rollout of Szechuan sauce. I mean, it's right the= re. GIVE US THAT SAUCE. The easiest question on last week's Easy Qu= iz was about the meaning of the word "abhor". 97% of quiztakers knew that i= t means "to regard with extreme disgust or hatred," like most Farkers feel = about the Politics tab. If you missed out last week, now's a = great time to [catch u= p on the Fark Weird News Quiz](3D"=) now that you know a few of the answers. C= ongratulations once again to the winners, and we'll do it all again on Frid= ay. --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") f= rom newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click here to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). 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