Fark NotNewsletter: Real Eclipse Hours

This is a multi-part message in MIME format... ------------=_1712177052-65097-13709 Content-Type: text/html Content-Disposition: inline Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [3D"The](3D")= > [3D"Totalfark"](3D") Having trouble reading thi= s email? View it online [here](3D". Comments thread: [(3D" Unsubscribe links are at the bottom of this message. =20 =20 ________________________ A message= from Drew Curtis: ________________________ Hey everyone hope your week's been well.= span> Hope you enjoyed Fark's Move to= Canada April Fool's Day celebration. The moderators and dev get all = the credit for it, they worked for weeks on all the details. I don't = know for sure if all the hidden easter eggs were found but I think most wer= e. As an added bonus, we're leaving Bobcaygeon up on the desktop hamb= urger menu (the =3D) before we move other stuff in there. Might leave= it up there after too. I think the right way to handle April Fools i= s instead of trying to get people to fall for a lie, just be weird. Speaking of April Fools, did anyone r= ead any articles they couldn't tell were pranks or not? One in partic= ular I read was about the changing path of the solar eclipse next week.&nbs= p; It seemed real but April 1st was not the best day to drop that particula= r news. Anyhow I'm planning on being well inside totality one way or = the other. Now we just need the weather forecast to cooperate. = Current plans for my family is to head up to Ohio, but if it's cloudy we mi= ght jump to Indiana, Illinois, maybe even Cleveland or something. I h= aven't looked to see when the next total eclipse is but the lack of mention= s tells me it's going to be awhile before there's another one in the United= States at least. No [livestream](3D")this week - April 1st on a Monday sucked 25% = of the potential fun stuff out of the news cycle so we're actually short on= material this week. Here's hoping for next week. _________= _______________ End Drew transmission ________________________ Top = Interactions Some of the best interactions from the past wee= k. Do note: this takes priority over being placed in "top comments.= " - [FlashHarry](3D"=), [SpectroBoy](3D"=), [Kattungali](3D" [jst3p,](3D") and = many others, discussed vasectomy and hysterectomy difficulties. - This Thread[captured Farkers' reactions to our Canadian April Fools theme.](3D"h=)- [Our older Farke= rs gathered in](3D") This Thread. Top Comments Some of the top-voted smartes= t and funniest comments from the past week. If your post isn't here, ass= ume that NotNewsletterMonkey couldn't think of a tagline.(The [Smartest and](3D"=)[Funniest for the past month are found elsewhere.) Funny: -&n= bsp;buntz](3D"=)[really isn't going to change their Best Buy buyi= ng habits at all.](3D"ht=) - Ivo Shandor[diagrammed the= salvage crane migration patterns, so we can all go crane-watching.](3D") = - [Yes, yes](3D")Drew[was.](3D" Smart:- Three Crooked Squirrels[spotted a second time tr= aveler on Fark.](3D" - Jojo_TheDogFacedBoy[*looks a= t tagline* Wait, seriously? Yeah, article's about the second thing= you'd think they do.](3D") - cretinbob[(and several= other Farkers) highly recommend you watch Enemy Mine to honor the death of= Louis Gossett Jr.](3D") - El Mariaski[knows why we = don't start "unscheduled fire drills."](3D") - Ghastly= g>[: "The government is coming for their tin foil."](3D") - EB= N-OZN[- are you talking about the Mythbusters exploding water heat= er?](3D"=) [= Politics](3D"https:/=) Politics Funny: - [Fund](3D")= >foo monkey['s School of Journalism by giving this post vot= es! Surely it'll have about as much effect as a petition!](3D"=) - enry[relayed a social media post about the irony of the TFG b= ible.](3D"=) - Dr Dreidel[: "We should have expected M= y Hankey to be a shiat person."](3D" Politics Smart: -&n= bsp;Tax Boy[has a comeback for being called a "Farking idi= ot."](3D"=) - Alphax[spotted an increase in visibilit= y due to GOP nonsense.](3D" - transporter_ii[What d= oes DEI mean, anyways?](3D") - ViolentEastCoastCity:= "...it's a fake target and you've put it there yourself." - OdradekRex[continuing their post: 'It's not like you're usin= g those funds, anyways.'](3D"htt=) Monkey's Pick= I felt these posts were exceptionally funny or smart, even though = they didn't get many votes. Warning: Unsorted, may contain politics. = Funny: - JaytheFarkingCanadian[...ye= s? It's the Internet.](3D") - GN Nymph[is off to go = murder a cuppa Joe.](3D") - Soup4Bonnie[has a theory= as to why people have slowed down on calling stuff "woke."](3D") Smart: - Sim Tree[believes this Best Buy d= ecision sounds like a Zelinsky defense.](3D" - All American = Commenter[wonders how many people are more afraid of nanomachines = than direct brain interfaces.](3D"=) - Jormungandr[wi= shes people were better-informed about colorblindness.](3D") - Jim_Callahan[explained how to correctly check carbon monoxide de= tectors.](3D"https=) - moothemagiccow[has a reason to hope= the abortion pill case will be unable to find the real-life example needed= to ban the pills.](3D" [CSB](3D" Morning theme - "[= Easter Edition](3D")" This week, Farkers were challenged= to share their favorite Easter stories. [Funny](3D"): *Looks at thread* ... = It's all Jesus memes! Why is it all Jesus memes?! (They're in the link a= bove, if you want to see them.) - Subtonic['s paren= ts stole their Ring-Pops.](3D") - bighairyguy[was th= e one who stole them.](3D") - hubiestubert[used cute= ness to earn chocolate for breakfast.](3D") - thealgorerhythm= [found the Easter Bunny's real eggs - not like the decoy ones that= have candy in them.](3D"=) Smart: - Groupon boob job= >[hated Easter because of religion.](3D") - kb7rky's = g>[family is missing dad and grandpa](3D") - Cafe Threads= ong>[found a meme about Jesus being the original millenial.](3D") - Sneelock[... Who in the world doesn't get their kids an equa= l amount of candy?](3D"http=) - cherryl taggart['s Easter = tradition is one of the oddest of them all - climbing a mountain to sing at= its peak.](3D") Top Contest= Entries Some of the top-voted [contest](3D" entries from last week. As always, everybody g= ets one - and they're sorted by how likely they are to still be open. [Photosh= ops](3D"=): We had two Photoshop Tennis matches this week, w= here Farkers edit other Farkers' edited photos. Check out: - the [Canadian Edition](3D"). - the [creation of a FARK-worthy Easter bonnet.](3D" In addition, below are the other Photoshops: - samsquatc= h[applied "you are what you eat" to flamingos.](3D"=) - Thoaar[is on the hunt.](3D"https://=) - Yammering_Splat_= Vector[set a new record for "world's most uncomfortable-looking ha= t."](3D"=) - EvaDewer[found the ass end of the earth.=](3D" - retrophil[realized how much this uniform fi= t Dudley Do-Right.](3D" - RedZoneTuba[immortalized = a classic Canadian comedy on their flag.](3D") - p51d007= ong>[knows where the gunshot noises were coming from.](3D") - bathbone[designed a Soylent Green-brand dinner.](3D"=) - X-Geek[had to watch the Monolith.](3D"https://=) - Subse= quentDamage[really, really hopes their car will start.](3D"https://=) -&nb= sp;samthecamel[ended up taking an experimental time machi= ne to the beach in winter.](=3D" - markie_farkie[had= a spectacular computer failure.](3D") - Bumcheese[c= aught Taarna having to take her backup mount.](3D") - Octafry= e[stole spaghetti.](3D"=) - Herb Utsmelz[e= ntered their cat-orb in the local agility competition.](3D") - jaylight2003[invented a more mythical band.](3D"https=) - kabloink[lifts the Death Star for his morning workout.](3D"https://w=) -&= nbsp;Mock26[decided to add some tension to this table tenn= is tournament.](3D"=) - I_Am_Weasel[was given an of= fer he couldn't refuse by the Godfather. Or the easter bunny. One of the tw= o.](3D") [Captions](3D"=): "[Caption this joyful sprint](3D")= >" (image) - Driver [incited a kid stam= pede.](3D") - Petite Mel [insists their creation fly.](3D" "[Caption this scintillating conversation, eh" (](3D"=)[image](3D")) - = Anderson's Pooper[... Something's in that beer, isn't there.](3D"ht=) - Snubnose[got overexcited.](3D"=) - RedZoneTuba [was the first victim of a Canadian bacon shortage.](3D"=) "[Caption this sporting discussion](3D")" ([image](3D"=)) - RedZoneTuba= [laid down the rules of Trump Golf.](3D") - Octafrye [tem= pted rain.](3D") "[Caption this barely bearable = conversation](3D"http=)" ([image](3D")) - RedZ= oneTuba [was given a bullshiat reason.](3D"=) - Lady J= ong> [unleashed the Spice Girl bears oh god-](3D") "[Caption t= his recursion (and cat)](3D")" ([image](3D")) - Jesus McSordid [wonders why the cat was asked for their opinion. - RedZoneTuba](3D"ht=)[gave a cat's answer.](3D" [Farkt= ography theme:](3D"=) "[Pattern Recognition](3D")" This week, Farkers were challenged to show us= photos with repeating patterns as their primary focus. - E= lsinore[took a beautiful photo of a sea anemone. Sorry, wro= ng plant - water lily.](3D".=) - Lovesandwich[went bac= kstage of a 3,000-pipe organ.](3D") - MorningBreath = had a delicious pastry. - kittyhas1000legs[vis= ited the outer wall of the Garden of One Thousand Buddhas.](3D") - bikkurikun[looked through an ancient grate.](3D"htt=) [Upcoming Fark Parties](3D") It's easy to plan for a = Fark Party - you're effectively saying that "I'm going to be here at this t= ime, come hang out." [Submit one!](3D"https:/=) [Monday, April 8, 2024, Total eclipse of the Sun Fark Party at N= oon.](3D") Less than a week to go for This Fark Party - this will = be the last time the NotNewsletter can remind you of this event before it o= ccurs. We're still meeting at [a swingset on the golf course in Dela= ware Park](3D". Mr. Fuzzypaws [posted some images](3D". Fark Headlines of the Week = A selection of some of the top headlines from last week. [Rescue c= hoppers in flight, shining down their spotlights, gave proof through the ni= ght, that the bridge wasn't there](3D") [Washington mourns as 82 year old Joe = dies following complications from a fall](3D") [Sam Bankman Freed, but not for 25 years](3D") = [First, the bridge collapses. Now, the salvage cranes are disappear= ing. We just can't catch a break in this town](3D") [Philadelp= hia DA sues 20 pharma companies for price gouging on insulin. Sweet](3D") = [Canada's maple syrup reserves fall to 16-year l= ow. National threat level raised to CONSARNIT](3D") [Large bru= sh fire breaks out at Mosaic company plant. Authorities say they will attem= pt to piece everything together to get the whole picture when they're throu= gh](3D") Fark Weird News Qui= z (brought to you by ox45tallboy) Another f= un time on the Weird News Quiz last week, where we learned Elvis fans love = meat tender. On the Quiz itself, mrs. badcrumble came out = on top with a score of 958, followed by VooDoo_Blonde= in second with 939 and WoolyManwich in third with 92= 7. Priapetic made fourth with 910. and N= o Catchy Nickname made it into the top five with 900. The = hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about "Operation Ghostbusters= ". Only 15% of quiztakers knew that Zuckerberg really was evil enough to ma= ke their "free" VPN service Onavo a way to monitor their users activity wit= hin the rival Snapchat app. As Snapchat uses end-to-end encryption, it's im= possible for rivals to get true analytics on service usage, but when you've= got an app monitoring the traffic directly, it's far easier. The easiest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about why "Yellowstone" = actor Forrie J. Smith was kicked off a plane over the weekend. 84% of quizt= akers knew he had had a few drinks and then decided he wouldn't sit next to= someone wearing a mask. I have no doubt once the fracas began, others on t= he plane were digging through their carry-ons looking for their own masks.&= nbsp; The hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about which= restaurant was now offering their sauces in bottles at your local grocery = store. 63% of quiztakers recognized Roasted Garlic Aioli, Sweet Onion Teriy= aki, and Baja Chipotle as Subway sauces. I'm just having trouble picturing = in my head the idea of putting anything called "aioli" on the traditional b= aloney sandwich in my part of the country. "Want some aioli?" "What'd you c= all me?" The easiest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about th= e definition of "pedantic". 91% of quiztakers knew it meant "annoyingly par= ticular over minor, unimportant details". I mean, it was actually 90.8%, an= d there's a lead time between when I write this and you read it, so it coul= d have shifted a percent or two between now and then, and there's also the = possibility that other quiztakers taking it after I write it could get it w= rong and also get the one about the restaurant drive-thru balcony right, wh= ich would make it the one most people got right.... If you missed o= ut last week, now's a great time to [catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz](3D" now that you know a= few of the answers. Congratulations once again to the winners, and we'll d= o it all again on Friday. --------------------------------------------------------------- ([Fark.com](3D"") sent this newsletter emai= l to: {EMAIL}) To stop these emails, go to the Notifications tab of your [MyFark profile](3D"https:=) to change your subscription preferences. Or, [click here to unsubscribe](3D") f= rom newsletter emails, even if your Fark login isn't '{NAME}'. [Click here to unsubscribe from ALL Fark emails](3D"). Fark, Inc. PO Box 1291, Versailles KY 40383 = ------------=_1712177052-65097-13709--