Paul Ryan's Career Ends as It Was: Full of Garbage

Be gone, zombie-eyed granny-starver from the State of Wisconsin. Go to your fat lobbying gig. If you have trouble reading this message, [view it in a browser](. [Paul Ryan's Career Ends as It Was: As Full of Sh*t as a Christmas Goose]( Speaker Paul Ryan, the zombie-eyed granny starver from the state of Wisconsin, writes Esquire’s Charles P. Pierce, has spent this week bidding farewell to Our Nation's Capital, and taking both his prodigious ego, and parading the tattered remnants of his utterly undeserved reputation down the boulevards of Washington. To complete the metaphor, somebody should have walked behind him with the shovel and a bucket. [Read More]( [‘God Created Everything. Testicles Too’: Inside Ashland, Nebraska’s 25th Annual Testicle Festival]( Writer Wei Tchou and photographer Bess Adler attended an annual testicle festival—where people gather to eat the delicacy and enjoy live music and beer— in the middle of Trump country, to get to the bottom of what makes a man.[Read More]( [4 Ways to Gift Diamonds This Holiday Season]( [Created for Forevermark]( None of which are an engagement ring.[Read More]( [56 Great Gifts to Get Your Dad]( Dad has been giving you stuff since you were born. Isn't it time you return the favor? Consider the upcoming holidays your time to give him something thoughtful—and cool. Whether he's into great coffee, old whiskey, or making the most out of his home, here are plenty of gifts to make his day.[Read More]( [Shocker: Grift King Wilbur Ross Did Not Tell the Truth About Selling His Stocks]( One of the most consistently underrated cartoon oligarchs now plaguing our national government is Wilbur Ross. The Secretary of Commerce is a Businessman with a long and storied career making Business Deals. Also, he allegedly stole $120 million from his various business partners over the years, which caused the godless socialists at Forbes magazine to announce he "could rank among the biggest grifters in American history." We spent all that time chasing Scott Pruitt and Ryan Zinke, but the Grift King was right in front of us this whole time. Naturally, this public servant has brought a viper's nest of conflicts-of-interest and ethics issues into office.[Read More]( [Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson's Men in Black: International Looks Good as Hell]( The first Men in Black: International trailer—from Straight Outta Compton director F. Gary Gray—has the duo suited up and defending London from an interstellar threat. By the looks of it, Thompson and Hemsworth's chemistry is as great as ever. Plus, with appearances by Liam Neeson and Emma Thompson, the newest iteration of MIB is stacked. [Read More]( [Read More on Esquire.com]( Follow Us [Unsubscribe]( [Privacy Notice]( esquire.com ©2018 Hearst Communications Inc. All Rights Reserved. Hearst Email Privacy, 300 W 57th St., Fl. 19 (sta 1-1), New York, NY 10019