Newsletter Subject

We're unleashing Carnage 🕷

From

dbrand.com

Email Address

robots@dbrand.com

Sent On

Thu, Mar 7, 2024 08:41 PM

Email Preheader Text

Introducing Carnage: a new skin design that might look a little familiar... ͏  ͏ ?

Introducing Carnage: a new skin design that might look a little familiar... ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏  ͏ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ ­ [dbrand]( [Introducing: Carnage skins. With great power comes zero responsibility.]( [Buy Now]( Ever since our 2023 release of Arachnoplates, barely-literate customers just like you have been demanding we turn the design into a series of skins. At first, we scoffed at this suggestion. After all, they're called "Arachnoplates". It's right there in the name: plates. Rather than wasting any effort on their senseless suggestion, we spun up a Dinnerware Division, seeking to get into the impossibly lucrative market of red-and-black, arachnid-themed dinner plates. Our team of Dinnerware Scientists were tasked with a simple exercise: source the world's finest porcelain and master the dark arts of bisque-fired underglazing. Ultimately, they produced thousands of tableware sets much faster than we'd expected. Rather than granting the scientists their freedom, we simply had them re-allocated to the Matador Division to serve out the remainder of their contract. You see, right next door to the Dinnerware Division was a fledgling group of Matador Scientists. For years, they had been struggling to subdue an especially temperamental bull. Unfortunately, when opening the doors to greet their newfound colleagues, the Matador Scientists inadvertently released the bull… directly into the Dinnerware Division, destroying the thousands of plates that we had intended to sell. We’ve learned a number of valuable lessons throughout this carnage. First, that Dinnerware Scientists also make for great janitors. Second, perhaps we don’t actually need a Matador Division… or a Dinnerware Division. Most importantly, we found that maybe those barely-literate customers who asked for Arachnoplates skins were onto something. In hindsight, all we had to do was give it a new name. [Twitter]( [Custom]( [Custom]( [Custom]( [Custom]( [Click here and we'll never email you again.]( © 4024 All rights reserved. [dbrand.com](

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