🙃 Happiness Still Matters

I made a big choice...  [Brendon pic](  I Prioritized THIS...  {NAME} -  A long time ago, I made a big choice. Maybe the most important... Here's what was happening... I was stressed. I had just begun my first "career." Fresh out of grad school, I got a change management job. For a huge company. They worked us like crazy. High pressure. 100 hour weeks all the time. I was learning a TON. I was starting to make real money. I had the adventure of travel, of meeting new people, of challenging projects. I had come SO far. I felt crazy gratitude for the opportunity. Nothing to complain about. When you came from little you don't complain, right? But I wasn't HAPPY. So I made the call: To get ready to leave the job, to give myself a 6 month deadline to do so, to follow my dream to become a writer and coach. Best career decision I ever made. I know, there was a lot of luck at play. I know, it seems irresponsible these days, priviledged even, to talk about job changes. But you know what... I think a LOT of people DISCOUNT the value of happiness. They say, "Life isn't all about happiness," or "happiness is just fleeting so don't expect it so much." Or, "there's so many TERRIBLE things happening in this world, how can you be so SELFISH... happiness doesn't matter..." But after coaching people full-time for 16 YEARS... ... after being compensated ONLY if people are satisfied with the life change they get when they work with me... ... after global research, academic reviews, and time spent communicating with real people, millions around the globe, every single day ... I can say that generating and cherishing happiness is IMPORTANT to our lives. Yes, there are a lot of other things we want and need to also seek: meaning, strength, depth, competency, fulfillment, connection, belonging, love, growth, actualization. But people who have a lot of meaning in their life? They're happier. People who have love and fulfillment? Happy. People who can see, face, confront the struggle and suffering and awfulness of this world and still find, choose, generate some peace, kindness, appreciation, joy... doesn't that matter? No, not everyone is always happy. But, certainly, those who choose it and build for some meaning and joy and light have happiness more consistently than others. So don't say happiness doesn't matter if it's a natural outcome of good things. Why do people say "don't put too much stock in happiness?" Well, it's likely just how you DEFINE IT. What is happiness to you? What makes you happy? How important is happiness at this stage of your life? For me, the best choice I ever made was to MAKE HAPPINESS both a PRIORITY and a PRACTICE. I'm a young guy, only in my 40s. But I've been through a fair bit of difficulty in life, you could say. Poverty, broken heart, business failure, failure of my first books and dreams, brain injuries, broken bones, loss of loved ones, extreme violence, the crushing rudeness, expectations and judgment that comes with "making it" (and sustaining it)... ... the horrible realities of coaching others when their loved ones die, leave them, cheat on them, abuse them, steal from them. I've had those types of human and difficult conversation every single week... for 16 years. It's a lot. This of course is just my experience and there's a whole LOT of bad things happening in the world too... But you know what... On a weekly basis, I've trainined myself to have a fairly "even" or similar level of happiness throughout all those trials and failures, triumphs and growth and service. Many would say I actually have an "elevated" level of happiness. There are big dips and big swings, but on par, I've been a happy human for 26 years since my car accident (my anniversary was this weekend) when I learned how precious life was. How? Am I built that way? No. (Though some psychologists suggest there is a happiness "set point," it's interesting that almost no one serious who I have met who has spent a decade in actual day-to-day human behavior change believes that people can't become dramatically happier with training. If there was a set point, I'd be stuck down low, but I consistently, through prioritization and practice, elevate that. Happiness can be deliberate and that's the blessing of the human species, right?). Am I lucky? Sure. But that doesn't mean that luck doesn't expand based on one's attention, intention and consistent actions. So what made the difference? Already told you. MAKE HAPPINESS A PRIORITY. MAKE HAPPINESS A PRACTICE. Those two things man. I'm telling you. The thing is: YOU have to figure out HOW to do those two things YOURSELF. You have to dive deep into self-improvement and see what works for you. You have to reflect and journal. You have to learn to get present and mindful and grateful. You have to get momentum. You have to choose the right missions ([here's an episode on that](). You have to zoom in on the beautiful moments. I just think... If you've come THIS FAR in life.... You deserve a little more happiness now. A little more every month and year. Happiness builds. Just like a yoga practice or going to the gym.. you get stronger in the practice. You see that photo at the top of this email. That's a HAPPY DUDE. I'm as happy as ever because I'm choosing that, practicing that, aligning my efforts and life to that. What makes me happy? Aliveness, connection, meaningful pursuits. (I think those things make us happy at the macro level in life- we all want those things as I [posted about here](). But also.. the small things. Writing this email to you brought a lot of happiness today. Knowing that maybe in a world crushing us with darkness there can be some hope and we can find our own corners of light. Walks with my wife, good talks with my friends, working out, reading good books, a great cup of tea. Simple things. Every day things. Just consistently dropping into the moment and enjoying this rare and special blessing of life. I guess my car accident taught me the importance of that 26 years ago. Think about your happiness today. Prioritize. Practice. Love you. Your coach, - Brendon  Most Popular Podcast Episodes this Week! [Finding Your Mission(s)]( [Workout:Â]([Ask for Help]( [Healthy Debate w Your Loved Ones]( Listen on [Apple](, [Spotify](, [Google]( or Alexa.  My Sunday Review and How I Make Self-Improvement a Way of Life"  It's Sunday, so I did my Sunday review in GrowthDay app: - I scored my high-performance habits from last week. (Do that in [GrowthDay here]().  - I journaled about my mindset and appreciations in [the  Journal.]( I don't think there's an easier way to improve our mental health than keeping a great journaling routine.  - I planned my week by capturing my priorities and then - and this is HUGELY important for my productivity - I set up all my reminders. Reminders are the KEY to keeping a good minsdet and focused action. I use GrowthDay's reminder system in the [Plan section](. I use GrowthDay for this and more... inspirational classes, in-depth courses, community sharing, challenges. I use it every day, because every day is a great day to grow. [Login to GrowthDay](    Hey - you're awesome. I love creating training for you. Hit reply if you need anything, we always have your back. Of course, you can [unsubscribe](, just please be careful, bc that means I can't deliver your emails anymore, even for things you asked/paid for, as all our services are tied to your email address. But you can reach me anytime at support@brendon.com or 1300 1st St #368 Napa CA 94559. Â