How To Handle Unhappy Players - 1 on 1 Midseason Interviews

   If you’re not having midseason 1 on 1 interviews with your team, you could be making a huge mistake. You could be accidentally creating future conflicts and headaches that are not any fun for coaches to deal with.  But what’s the best way to conduct 1 on 1 interviews?  Even if you’re doing the 1 on 1 interviews, you might be making some big mistakes that are also causing issues.  That’s where 20 year coaching veteran Jeff Huber comes in. Jeff has been a head varsity coach for 15 years and has won multiple coach of the year awards at multiple schools.  Jeff is going to share his best tips and some of his biggest mistakes along the way!  That way, you can set yourself up to have a great season with fewer parent conflicts and misunderstandings. Here’s Jeff…  - Joe Haefner  Why NOW Is The Time For Player 1 on 1’s - 13 Tips For Midseason Player Interviews  - By Jeff Huber I’m sure you remember November. You selected your team. All your players were enthusiastic and optimistic about the upcoming season. Parents were on board.   When the season started, most if not all of your players had high expectations for themselves for the season. Most expected to be a big part of your team’s rotation, playing major minutes.   You probably met with your players in the first weeks of the season. This is a common and important coaching practice. This allows you to tell your players how you evaluate them at that time. You can also give them feedback on where they can improve and hear their expectations for the season.   If you’re like me, in some of those meetings you told players that they may not play a lot once games start. In November, a lot of players will tell you they are okay with that. As coaches, we love hearing that and figure everything will go smoothly.  That was November. . . this is January. For many of us, those preseason conversations seem like a distant memory. With the calendar turning to 2024, reality has set in for many of us (and our players).  Everyone’s situation is different. Some may be having a great season. Others may be struggling. However, one thing everyone likely has in common is unspoken player issues.   Remember that player who said they were okay with not playing much in games?   They have now been practicing 2 hours a day for 2 months without getting much playing time. They are also probably hearing from loved ones that they are getting a raw deal.  The best team I ever coached was one where 6 players played 95% of the minutes.   Even though the team was winning, players 7-12 were frustrated by their lack of playing time. Because we were winning and I was a young coach, I did not do a good enough job of confronting their concerns head on. I now know better.  However, it’s not just situations like the one above that create player issues.   A couple years later, I coached the deepest team I’ve ever coached.  We played 11 players and scored 91 points a game.   I thought playing 11 guys and scoring at such a high clip would keep everyone engaged and positive. I was wrong. Of those 11 players, players 4-11 all thought they should be playing more and other players in that group shouldn’t be playing at all.  The point is, no matter where your team is at, there are likely to be issues that need to be addressed.  Much has changed since the season began in November, and there is still a lot of time left in the season.   So don’t waste any more time or think that the issues will go away if you ignore them.  Author Jon Gordon says “where there is a void in communication, negativity will fill it.”   Don’t allow that to happen.  This week, schedule meetings with all your players and get everyone on the same page to finish your season strong! Here are some key ideas to remember as you do this.. 13 Tips For Midseason Player Interviews  * Listen first and ask questions. Be empathetic.  One of Steven Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is seek first to understand, then to be understood. This is great advice for player meetings.  Perhaps you have a player who is unhappy about their playing time but hasn’t been doing what’s necessary to earn playing time. It can be easy to want to jump right in and tell them all the reasons they aren’t playing (stay tuned, that will come later).  Do not start with that. Doing so will immediately put your player on the defensive and can turn the meeting sideways before it begins.  Start with questions. How do they feel things have been going? What are they enjoying? What’s been hard? How can you help? Are there things outside of basketball impacting their experience on the team?   Oftentimes people just want to be heard. Starting by letting them speak and showing you care through active listening sets the groundwork for a productive dialogue.  * Make it a dialogue and let them talk first.  Your meetings have to be a dialogue. Too many times, player 1 on 1’s turn into a monologue, with the coach doing all the speaking.   Your goal here is to learn about your player’s experience. You can’t do that if they don’t speak.   At the same time, we must realize that speaking to adults (particularly voicing concerns or frustrations) can be hard for players.   * Give them questions to consider in advance of meeting.  To help your players organize their thoughts, give them questions to reflect on in advance. I have done this both on paper and through a google form. Here are some questions you might use (players should know every question requires an explanation):  - How would you evaluate your season so far? - How has your work ethic and attitude been? - What type of teammate have you been? - Do you agree with the amount of playing time you’re receiving and your role on the team? - What should we start doing? - What should we stop doing? - What should we keep doing? - Is there anything outside of basketball impacting your experience?  - Are you on track to reach your goals? - How can I help you reach your goals?  If you walk into the meeting and start asking questions the player didn’t know about, they are likely to give you incomplete or unclear answers.   Giving them the questions a few days in advance and allowing them to put their thoughts on paper will get you to their true feelings.   * Don’t react strongly to criticism.  You might hear some criticism in their answers. Don’t react strongly, even if you disagree. Look for kernels of truth in the feedback. Acknowledging your own shortcomings goes a long way in getting players to acknowledge theirs.   If even after doing this you still feel like you aren’t getting the whole story, ask more questions! A good tip is to always conclude by asking how you can better assist the player. This helps ensure your players know you are there to help them.    * Make it about them.  You don’t know what players are going to tell you when they open up. Many will discuss themselves and their role. Some might use the forum as an opportunity to discuss or vent about their teammates.  Don’t fall into the trap of discussing other players. This can be destructive to a team. It pits players against each other and creates division.  Keep the conversation on them and their situation. If a player brings up a teammate in a critical way, redirect the conversation back to a focus on them.  * Be honest. Don’t make promises you can’t keep.  This sounds obvious but it’s not. As a young coach, this is a mistake I made. We are really vulnerable to it with good kids.  You probably have a player who is a great kid but limited ability wise. If this player isn’t playing much, it’s easy to feel for them.   When they express their frustration to you, it’s human nature to want to give them hope. While that is not a bad thing, make sure it’s true.   If one of your players isn’t playing much and that’s not going to change, don’t promise them more minutes. All that does is make the issue bigger going forward. As stated above, listen to them and be empathetic. That alone will minimize many issues.  After listening, tell them the truth. It may just be that the players ahead of them are better than them. Whoever backs up Nikola Jokic or Joel Embiid is one of the best basketball players in the world, but they won’t play much because they are behind two of the best players in the world. No matter how hard they work, that’s unlikely to change.   This doesn’t mean you are negative. You can and should give them areas to focus on to allow them to get better. (It is then critical to notice and celebrate these players when they do those things in practice.) Just don’t promise them something you can’t deliver on because you like them.  * Take notes of the meeting.  You should absolutely take notes of your meetings. We have all had conversations where we quickly forget what was said. We have all had conversations where you remember the talk one way and the other person remembers it differently.  Taking notes can prevent this from happening. It makes sure there is no ambiguity once the meeting ends.    To ensure that, you should share the notes with the player.   * Review notes with the athlete in the next day or two.  Print a copy of the notes and review it with them a day or two after the meeting. This only takes a minute or two but ensures you are on the same page.   Your notes are also good to have when talking with parents of players. It is helpful to be able to show them what you and their child discussed. Many times parents' frustrations are magnified when they don’t get the entire version of events. Having notes of your meeting can help head that off.  You might even consider sharing the notes with parents proactively. While there is some risk in this (it might be perceived as an invitation for parents to voice their concerns), many parents would be grateful to know what was discussed.   Whether you choose to share with parents or not, having notes ensures the record of your meetings. It also provides a good starting point for your next meeting with that player.  * Have something for everyone and give happy players new challenges too.  So far these tips have focused on players who are unhappy. Hopefully that’s not everyone! You should make sure you meet with everyone, including those having a great experience.  Give your happy players ways to improve. At your preseason meeting you probably discussed areas you’d like them to improve. Now is a great time to formally follow up and give them feedback.  If they are doing great, now is a good time to challenge them with something new. This keeps them hungry and growing as a player.  * Have players seek out potential locker room issues.  You can also challenge them to lead and help look for issues with teammates. Make them your ally as you look to protect your culture.   Players often know more than we do about the locker room. Use your best players as a sounding board.   When you do this, make sure you’re not jeopardizing your player’s trust with their teammates. You are not asking for them to tell on their teammates or gossip. You are asking them to let you know if an issue could negatively impact the team.   * Use quick follow ups for the remainder of the season.  Midseason 1 on 1’s are a great starting point. But they are just that - a starting point. They alone will not solve all issues.     Make sure you follow up with players through the remainder of the season. Your notes are a good starting point for this.  These follow ups don’t have to be as formal as the 1 on 1 you’re going to have now. They could be quick two minute conversations before or after practice. The goal is to keep the topics you discussed at the meeting at the front of your player’s mind.     * Talk to parents on alarming issues.  If you hear anything alarming in the meeting, you may want to follow up with parents, too. This shows your care for their child and want to partner with them in creating the best experience.   * Recognize and celebrate growth with players.  As the season progresses, revisit what you discussed. Recognize their growth. Sometimes that’s all a player is looking for. It’s easy for coaches to overlook the contributions of players who don’t play much in games. Make an effort to celebrate them in practice. That simple act goes a long way towards bettering their experience.  If they are struggling with what you discussed, revisit that as well. The bottom line is that the meeting is the starting point of communication, not the end point.  You are a good coach who cares about your players.   If you weren’t, it’s unlikely you would have read this article. That alone gives you a leg up in helping your players.   No matter where your season is at, you can make it better. The best way to do that is to get all your players focused on the right things as the season progresses. And the best way to direct their focus is to meet with them.  Yes, some of these meetings might be challenging.   Yes, some might lead to difficult conversations. Do it anyway!   The short term discomfort is well worth the long term benefit.   You will be a better coach. You will have happier players. And, you will have a better team. Meetings that produce are meetings worth having!  If you have other tips, questions, and suggestions, [please comment at the bottom of the article here]( and let us know!  - Jeff Huber Breakthrough Basketball    This email was sent to {EMAIL} because you indicated that you'd like to receive emails and updates from Breakthrough Basketball on 2016-12-16 05:42:39. If you don't want to receive such emails in the future, please [Change Your Email Preferences]( or [Unsubscribe All]( Copyright © Breakthrough Basketball, LLC. All rights reserved. Breakthrough Basketball, LLC. | 5001 1st Ave. SE, Ste 105 #254 | Cedar Rapids | IA | 52402 [email.gif] . It’s our mission to build a strong community centered around basketball, personal development and most importantly - fun! We love to create extraordinary and useful products and share them with you! We love to help people learn how to enjoy the game of basketball at the next level by simply creating the right products that they use in their practices and games. Every day we are building and strengthening partnerships with companies and coaches that are in alignment with our own values. We particularly love working with coaches, players, and parents because through their passion and their craft they help elevate the game of basketball. As much as we care about basketball, we also care about your privacy. Breakthrough Basketball is owned and operated by Breakthrough Basketball. We are committed to advising you of the right to your privacy, and strives to provide a safe and secure user experience. Our Privacy Policy explains how we collect, store and use personal information, provided by you on our website. When you visit our Web site you may provide us with two types of information: personal information you knowingly choose to disclose that is collected on an individual basis and Web site use information collected on an aggregate basis as you and others browse our Web site. For example, you may need to provide the following information: • Name • Website URL information • Email address • Home and business phone number It also explains how we collect and use non-personal information. By accessing and using our website, you explicitly accept, without limitation or qualification, the collection, use and transfer of the personal information and non-personal information in the manner described in our Privacy Policy. Please read this Policy on our website(s) carefully, as it affects your rights and liabilities under the law. If you disagree with the way we collect and process personal and non-personal information, please do not use this website. This Policy applies to this website as well as all webpages Breakthrough Basketball hosts. It regulates the processing of information relating to you and grants both of us various rights with respect to your personal data. It also informs you of how to notify us to stop using your personal information. We are located in the United States of America. You may be located in a country that has laws which are more restrictive about the collection and use of your personal information. However, by using our website, you agree to waive the more restrictive laws and agree to be governed by the laws of the United States of America. If you wish to view our official policies, please visit our website.