Psst! Wanna buy a social media platform?

The TikTok debate is getting messy. [Bloomberg]( This is Bloomberg Opinion Today, the real enemy of Bloomberg Opinion’s opinions. [Sign up here](. Today’s Agenda - [TikTok]( is in for [a shock](. - [Canada]( is nothing to mock. - An [Abercrombie bride](? Don’t balk. - [Porsche 911’s]( are all over the block. Tick Tock, [TikTok]( A few weeks ago, TikTok’s biggest problem in the US was [bed bugs](. Now, it’s [fighting]( for its life as [a bill]( that could ban the app in America weaves its way through Congress. “There is no future for a Chinese-owned TikTok in the US,” Dave Lee [writes]( (free read). “The threat of data harvesting, and propaganda, has proved so great that a notoriously divided Congress has (so far at least) found complete bipartisanship.” On Wednesday, a measure that would force ByteDance divest the platform within 165 days or risk an app store ban in the US will hit the House floor. If Congress succeeds with its push, TikTok’s [170 million US users]( could be hung out to dry by the end of this year. But there’s still hope for its survival. Finding a billionaire suitor to snatch up the business shouldn’t be too difficult, considering one in three Americans are on TikTok. Already, we’re seeing potential buyers come out of the woodwork, from Activision’s [Bobby Kotick]( to Shark Tank’s [Mr. Wonderful](. “It would be foolish not to explore such options with haste,” Dave argues. All week, TikTok has been encouraging its users to call Congress through [a series of push alerts](, to the [distress]( of elected officials. Regardless of whether those #KeepTikTok efforts are effective, more people are waking up to the fact that their [livelihoods]( are on the line: “When you spend three years building a surf brand on TikTok all of it to get banned out of nowhere,” Surf Trip Supply [posted](. “If they ban TikTok they better give us stimulus checks. Gonna be pandemic unemployment all over again,” Fiona Shea [said](. If it came to a ban, TikTok’s [ingenuity]( would be sorely missed (see: [this cinematic masterpiece](). But influencers are quick to jump ship if their social platform of choice starts sinking. At the South by Southwest Festival in Texas this week, Dave said their eyes were already beginning to wander to YouTube Shorts and Instagram Reels, where many already post. As for the politics of it all, things are [growing more chaotic]( by the hour. “There are few things that can get both the American left and right as exercised as the idea that a foreign nation is perverting the minds of their young,” Karishma Vaswani [writes](. But all that [bipartisan brouhaha]( is no sure thing. Mike Pence [says TikTok]( is “digital fentanyl,” yet Marjorie Taylor Greene [wants to]( “protect FREE SPEECH,” all while [AOC]( and [Jeff Jackson]( are [attempting]( to connect with the youngs on the app. Trump issued [an executive order]( against TikTok in 2020, but has since [done a 180 pivot]( on his stance by [directing his ire]( toward Facebook, the real “enemy of the people.” President Biden’s position is equally muddy: He [posted a TikTok]( at noon today, yet he says he’s got [his pen at the ready]( in the event that the legislation hits his desk. If that all has your mind spinning, you’re not alone. The whole thing is messier than a Reesa Teesa TikTok, but unlike her [marriage](, I can’t tell you how it ends. Bonus Big Tech Reading: Dear Sam Altman: [Secrets, secrets are no fun](, unless OpenAI shares with everyone. — Parmy Olson O, Canada Meanwhile in Canada, we have “a chorus of doomsayers” [pointing out]( that Canadian GDP is a dumpster fire of epic proportions. But Tyler Cowen [says]( the existential crisis is overstated: “Canada has not altered its fundamental and longstanding position: It is somewhat poorer than the US, but it is progressing at a more or less typical pace,” he writes. Canada has got a lot of things going for it, and I don’t mean just mean hockey, poutine and [The Bachelor](. Justin Trudeau’s nation boasts more egalitarian policies than the US. It’s [smart]( about immigration. And it appears to have the whole [men-must-do-laundry-and-dishes]( thing down, too. In fact, Justin Fox [says]( (free read) that “among a sample of advanced economies, those where men take on more housework and child care responsibilities have higher fertility rates.” Although Canada’s top earners sometimes head to the US to find greener pastures, Tyler argues that “says more about American virtues than Canadian defects.” In other words: “Canada is like a loft [apartment]( over a really great party,” just like Robin Williams [once said](. Budget Brides Can we just talk about TLC’s Say Yes to the Dress for a second? That show — and the fiancées that had “unlimited budgets” (even for [their dogs]() — made 12-year-old me completely [delusional](. Here I was, thinking a bride with a $3K limit was cheap!!! But no, she absolutely was not: Leticia Miranda [says]( budget-conscious shoppers are not willing to spend several thousand dollars on a wedding dress they’ll wear for a grand total of [eight hours](. Abercrombie — the [Nvidia]( of the shopping mall — is looking to get in on the affordable bridal action. “The casual fashion retailer [announced]( it’s dipping its toes into the wedding business with a new collection of more than 100 pieces for brides, bridesmaids and guests that range from $80 to $180,” she writes. At first glance, [the silhouettes]( in Abercrombie’s new collection feel tired to me. How many [polyester jumpsuits]( and [off-the-shoulder dresses]( does this world need? Plus, brands like [Anthropologie](, [ASOS]( and [Reformation]( have already carved out a niche in the industry. Even Amazon sells [inexpensive gowns](! Although brides on a budget are a far bigger business than TLC would have you believe, Abercrombie will need to play catch-up if it wants them to say I do. Telltale Charts I imagine the Venn diagram between people that are willing to spend $30,000 on a wedding dress and people who drive a Porsche 911 is just a circle. And it’s growing bigger by the day, if this Chris Bryant [column]( is any indication. Deliveries of the German manufacturer’s most expensive sports car increased by 24% in 2023 to more than 50,000 units, which is helping it combat its reputation as the [poor man’s Ferrari](. “Strong demand for the 911 shows that its wealthiest clients aren’t suffering as much from high interest rates and still can’t get enough of the brand — even if forced to wait around a year for their vehicles,” he writes. While you weren’t looking, the world (well, mainly China) went ahead and built enough solar panels to potentially meet the IEA’s 2030 installation target this year. “On the face of it, this sounds like a great problem to have,” David Fickling and Tim Culpan [write](. But it’s a lot trickier to connect a solar panel than it is to create one. “BloombergNEF expects more than half of manufacturing capacity to go unused this year and next,” they explain. “The current excess suggests further price declines are to come, which is great news for consumers, but terrible for manufacturers.” Further Reading The US might not be able to make [all the weapons]( to fight China. — Bloomberg’s editorial board Biden is right about Netanyahu [damaging]( Israel’s future. — Marc Champion What Russia [is doing in Ukraine]( falls outside the rules of warfare. — James Stavridis AI fervor has finally spread to the 160-year-old [pipeline sector](. — Liam Denning Can Nvidia’s [sales growth]( possibly be sustained? Cisco’s wasn’t. — John Authers and Richard Abbey Hong Kong’s [new security law]( is worryingly vague. — Karishma Vaswani The next Labour government should [make Britain boring]( again. — Adrian Wooldridge Don’t fear [AI in war](, fear autonomous weapons systems. — Andreas Kluth ICYMI [Steph Curry]( for president? 3M announced [a CEO shake-up](. AOC has a [new opponent](. Ex-special counsel [Hur talks]( to Congress. CNBC didn’t try to stop [Trump’s lies](. Kickers Cats are [misunderstood](. So are [nuts](. [Deathbed visions]( are a lesson in life. Teens have discovered [tanning beds](. Marketing degrees [aren’t helping]( Gen Z. Coders [built an AI]( that does their job for them. Notes: Please send poutine and feedback to Jessica Karl at jkarl9@bloomberg.net. [Sign up here]( and follow us on [Threads](, [TikTok](, [Twitter](, [Instagram]( and [Facebook](. Follow Us Like getting this newsletter? [Subscribe to Bloomberg.com]( for unlimited access to trusted, data-driven journalism and subscriber-only insights. Before it’s here, it’s on the Bloomberg Terminal. Find out more about how the Terminal delivers information and analysis that financial professionals can’t find anywhere else. [Learn more](. Want to sponsor this newsletter? [Get in touch here](. You received this message because you are subscribed to Bloomberg's Opinion Today newsletter. If a friend forwarded you this message, [sign up here]( to get it in your inbox. [Unsubscribe]( [Bloomberg.com]( [Contact Us]( Bloomberg L.P. 731 Lexington Avenue, New York, NY 10022 [Ads Powered By Liveintent]( [Ad Choices](