Putin’s mojo sinks to ‘burning Crimea bridge’ levels

Plus: The Fed owes the world an apology. [Bloomberg]( Follow Us [Get the newsletter]( This is Bloomberg Opinion Today, a gold-toileted airplane of Bloomberg Opinion’s opinions. [Sign up here](. Today’s Agenda - The Crimea bridge explosion [exposed Putin’s weakness](. - The Fed [owes the world an apology](. - Elon [Musk is downright Trumpian](. - The OPEC+ production cut is [mostly an illusion](. Putin’s Bridge Too Far There was once a time when, if you were forced to swap lives with a murderous dictator, you could have done a lot worse than choosing Vladimir Putin. He had firm control of a large, industrialized country with nuclear weapons and oil, not to mention several houses, a yacht, and an airplane with a gold [toilet](. Picture Donald Trump, but with real money and a black belt in judo. Putin’s life is a lot less enviable these days. Somebody even ruined his birthday weekend by blowing up part of the only bridge connecting Russia to Crimea, a project [he seemed to consider a crowning achievement](, Clara Ferreira Marques writes. Putin retaliated by again demonstrating his zeal and proficiency for slaughtering innocent civilians. But he did not fire off a nuclear weapon, something we all have to fear every time Ukraine socks him in the nose. As Clara points out, going nuclear isn’t as easy as it sounds and won’t help Putin in any event. In fact, the war Putin chose to bolster his own standing just keeps exposing how weak and cornered he really is, Clara writes. Though a new spasm of random butchery and attacks on vital Ukrainian infrastructure have quieted hawks for now, the pressure will keep rising on Putin the more his military fails. Couldn’t he have just been happy with the gold toilet? Read the [whole thing](. Bonus Ukraine Reading: India is discovering the [downsides of cozying up to Putin](. — Mihir Sharma Mistakes Were Made There’s a scene in “The Pink Panther Strikes Back” in which Inspector Clouseau gathers a mansion staff in a parlor to [question]( them about a murder, and in just a few minutes manages to repeatedly injure himself and others while destroying several expensive objects, including a Steinway piano. Clouseau didn’t apologize for any of this; he was just doing his job. Some people argue the Fed has been similarly stumbling through the past couple of years, wreaking havoc on the global economy, in the process of doing its own job. Like the Steinway, this damage won’t be repaired easily, Bill Dudley writes. But the [Fed does owe the world an apology]( for its mistakes, so maybe we can at least hope they won’t happen again. While we wait for that, the global economy’s parlous state, along with the near-impossibility of policy coordination, mean [central bankers all over the world must stay frosty]( for new dangers, Bloomberg’s editorial board writes. One candidate might be the US banking system, which Bloomberg’s editorial board argues is [still not capitalized enough]( to handle another crisis. Former Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke just won a Nobel Prize for his studies of financial disasters, but otherwise nobody seems to have fully taken that work to heart. Of course, while we’re collecting apologies, [Bernanke might owe one too](, writes Stuart Trow. He was part of the establishment that let risks run wild ahead of the latest financial crisis, Stuart writes. In that sense, the Nobel people gave him an award partially for cleaning up his own mess. Bonus Fed Reading: Investors keep getting [disappointed betting on a Fed pivot]( with no foundation. — Mohamed El-Erian Elon. Trump. Last week, for some reason, the House Judiciary Committee GOP [tweeted]( “Kanye. Elon. Trump.” Maybe they wanted to cement these three as the Mount Rushmore of a new-look Republican Party. It’s still not clear why, nor is it clear why the tweet hasn’t been deleted since Kanye (West) went full [antisemite]( shortly afterward. Elon (Musk), who welcomed Kanye back to Twitter in mid-controversy, might not want to be associated with Kanye for a little while. But he will be tied to (Donald) Trump for a while longer, especially if he takes over Twitter and lets the former president back onto that hellsite. And the ties don’t end there, Tim O’Brien writes. In his business dealings, legal battles and braggadocio, [Musk increasingly resembles Trump](, Tim writes, and not in a good way; the vibe both men give lately is “emperor with no clothes.” Naturally, this means Musk will be president soon. Telltale Charts OPEC+’s [production cut is mostly a mirage](, once you factor in how many countries will cheat on it, Julian Lee writes. But watch what happens when we start clamping down harder on Russian oil. And just to be extra-annoying, the Saudis will [target their export cuts at the US](, Julian writes in our Elements newsletter. Automakers [risk turning off a generation of buyers]( by keeping new cars too expensive, warns Chris Bryant. Further Reading [Limiting China’s access to computer chips]( is a way of hemming in its economy and military. — Hal Brands US pension funds may not be risky in the same way UK funds are, but [they are riskier than we imagined](. — Allison Schrager Here are the [five themes that will mold capitalism]( in the future. — Adrian Wooldridge Brazil’s election tells us something about [authoritarian movements around the world](. — Eduardo Porter [San Francisco’s empty train cars]( spell trouble for the city. — Justin Fox How Italy’s winemakers are [adapting to climate change](. — Frank Wilkinson The [first James Bond movie]( created a whole lot of durable branding. — Ben Schott ICYMI The [housing market is getting weird](. [Germany did an about-face]( on energy-crisis loans. [Yuri Milner renounced]( his Russian citizenship. Kickers Why you [think better in the shower](. Scientists can now [make beer taste better](. (h/t Ellen Kominers for the first two kickers) New San Francisco restaurant is [exclusively for dogs](. (h/t Scott Kominers) Area man who can’t swim [rows across the Atlantic](. Notes: Please send doggie bags and feedback to Mark Gongloff at mgongloff1@bloomberg.net. [Sign up here]( and follow us on [Instagram](, [TikTok](, [Twitter]( and [Facebook](. Like getting this newsletter? [Subscribe to Bloomberg.com]( for unlimited access to trusted, data-driven journalism and subscriber-only insights. Before it’s here, it’s on the Bloomberg Terminal. Find out more about how the Terminal delivers information and analysis that financial professionals can’t find anywhere else. [Learn more](. You received this message because you are subscribed to Bloomberg's Opinion Today newsletter. [Unsubscribe]( | [Bloomberg.com]( | [Contact Us]( [Ads Powered By Liveintent]( | [Ad Choices]( Bloomberg L.P. 731 Lexington, New York, NY, 10022