Three rules of gift giving

Plus: gift guides galore! And an expert Q&A [View in browser]( [Bloomberg]( Hi, I’m [Matthew Kronsberg](, and I write about gear, gadgets, and occasionally food around here. Allow me to welcome you all to Shopping Season 2022. May the odds be ever in your favor. This time of year, I spend way too much time thinking about the odds. I can’t help but try to take an empirical approach to the subjective, slippery, maddening world of [gracious gift giving](. Which present is more likely to make the recipient happy—a total surprise, or the thing they actually asked for? What are the chances that spending 50% more on a gift will deliver 50% more happiness? I always assumed these sorts of questions were unanswerable, until I reached out to the perfectly named [Dr. Julian Givi](. He studies consumer behavior with an eye towards the psychology of gift giving and receiving at the John Chambers College of Business and Economics at West Virginia University. In talking with him, and reading some of his data-rich papers, I learned three big lessons that will change the way I, and maybe you, will think about shopping this year. Etiquette guru Emily Post’s great-great-grandson gives some great advice for thriving during the holidays. Illustration: Tomi Um 1. Twice is Nice The first thing I tend to do when making a shopping list is think back on what I gave someone last year, just to make sure I don’t repeat the gift. This obviously makes sense with durable goods: most people don’t need [a second Peloton](. But what about consumables? Last year I gave my wife a selection of [indulgent tinned seafood](, which went over like gangbusters. The options have [only grown]( since then, but I worried that it might come off as lazy or indifferent to repeat myself. I shouldn’t have. In one study, 62% of people surveyed by Givi said they would want to receive an encore of a great present, even though only 30% of subjects would choose to give the same thing twice. Now that that’s settled, it’s time to pony up for the [Tin Fish Trifecta]( from Gulf of Maine Conservas, with bluefin tuna, Atlantic mackerel, and smoked eel. Gifts of Wonder to surprise and delight. Illustration: Qianhui Yu 2. It’s Not a Competition At large family gatherings, gift giving can turn into an arms race, with siblings vying to give a nephew the biggest [Lego set]( (that would be the new 10,000-piece [Eiffel Tower](), or Dad the coolest bottle of Scotch (try the[Lagavulin Offerman Edition: Charred Oak Cask](). Givi found that recipients rarely engage in “social comparisons,” that is, judging the gift from one person against that from another. I’m going to take comfort in this one because earlier this week, I heard from my sister that she went “Mad Max with a mama bear thing happening,” at her laptop, and managed to snag a pair of Taylor Swift tickets for my niece, before early sales turned into a [stadium-sized boondoggle]( for Ticketmaster and fans alike. I know I’ll never ever ever top that gift. It’s a relief to know I don't have to try. Then again, if you want your recipient to be seeing green... Photographer: Sarah Anne Ward for Bloomberg Businessweek 3. Some Is Better Than None Let’s say you’re [an audiophile](. Or a [coffee nerd](. You’ve invested real money in gear; more than you’d spend on a gift. And let’s say someone you’re shopping for wants to follow in your footsteps. Would you give them a cheaper [version of your speakers]( or [espresso maker](? Many people Givi surveyed would not, and would, in fact, go far out of their way to find something—anything—else to give, rather than risk offending the recipient. Recipients, however, were far less likely to be offended by a stepped-down gift than givers feared. So, if you’re rocking a [McIntosh RS250]( wireless speaker, but your giving budget only covers the [RS150](? Go for it. Still, indulgence is the universal language of love. Photographer: Sarah Anne Ward for Bloomberg Businessweek To me, the overarching takeaway from all of this is that recipients are statistically speaking, much more generous in their evaluations of gifts than we, as givers, are. And that’s great—for once, the odds truly are in your favor. Connect with Matt on [Instagram]( and [Twitter]( Need inspiration? There’s over $1 million in objects packed into these articles below. But even beyond the luxury, there’s ideas aplenty—and full of wonder—at all price points in our seasonal shopping guides. Skip down to the Q&A for even more gifting intel. [11 Holiday Gift Ideas That Are Truly Magical]( Whether your loved one is 6 or going on 60, here are inspired items that will spark delight, curiosity and a love of nature. [85 Decadent Gifts to Spoil Your Whole List]( These presents will suit every mood. [The 14 Best New Spirits for Holiday Entertaining]( And wine, too! Your guide to sensational seasonal sipping. [CityLab’s 2022 Holiday Gift Guide]( From Amtrak Joes to cycling bros, CityLab has a gift for every urbanist on your shopping list. [Is That an E-Bike Under the Tree?]( Bloomberg Green’s guide to finding the right electric bike. These are the ones I’m one of the main product testers for [“The One” column]( in Bloomberg Businessweek: [humidifiers](, [cutting boards](, [projectors](, [pocket knives](... right now I have [the new speaker]( from [$270 Japanese toaster]( people, Balmuda. It looks like a lantern, with these gently glowing, pulsing lights in it. They’re pretty, but kind of pointless. The sound is … fine. Most hybrid objects are like that: the whole is slightly less than the sum of its parts. People ask me what the worst thing I’ve ever tested is, but most things that come my way are merely middling. Abject failures are rare. If I didn’t have to go through the headache of shipping samples back to publicists, I’d invite more garbage into my world, because I kind of love a disaster. Now when people ask me what my favorite things that I’ve reviewed are, that’s easier. Over my past six years here with Pursuits, I was genuinely sad to be done with the items below. (And yes, a $1,300 designer branded yoga ball may seem ridiculous, but just think: what’s a bigger status move than walking around with a truly massive Dior ballsack should you turn the cover into a duffel bag?)  [The Best Hi-Fi Headphones for Wild, Wired-In Sound]( [The Humble Pencil Is Just Now Hitting Its Prime]( [This $1,495 Coffee Grinder Makes You Work for a Great Brew]( [Treat Your Taste Buds With Spices That Michelin-Starred Chefs Use]( [A $1,300 Yoga Ball Tests the Limits of Fashionable Functionality]( What else is on my radar - For plotting this year’s pastry projects, I’ve turned to Laurel Kratochvila’s new book [New European Baking: 99 Recipes for Breads, Brioches and Pastries](. First up for me: the Gooey Chocolate Rugelach that Kratochvila sells at her shop, [Fine Bagels]( in Berlin. I’m also wildly intrigued by Pain Café Caramelisé, a caramelized coffee sourdough bread from Parisian baker Xavier Netry. - I just got to the point in my pile of New Yorkers where I read about the renovation of Lincoln Center’s David Geffen Hall, and [the art and science of making a concert space sound good](. It made me appreciate the degree to which even a great home audio system like the [Omnia speaker we wrote up](, can be affected by the room it’s in. To see how much, try adding some [acoustic panels]( to your space. Geffen’s walls are made of molded beech and meant to evoke sound waves. Photographer: Michael Moran - I’ve been following [Andy Saunders]( on Instagram for a while now, marveling at [the stunning detail]( he’s coaxed from archival images of America’s space program by using digital restoration techniques on NASA’s original film transparencies. His work is collected in a new book, [Apollo Remastered](. It is, for space geeks, what last year’s [Peter Jackson’s Beatles doc]( was for music fans. - And [Where Were You in ’92?]( The new podcast from Entertainment Weekly editor Jason Lamphier is for music junkies like me that forgot just how many major hits and scandalous headlines were packed into one wild, history-making 12 months three decades ago. So, you had some questions... Whatever the topic, keep them coming for next week via our [Bloomberg Pursuits Instagram]( and [e-mail](mailto:askpursuits@bloomberg.net?I have a question). What is a good gift for the parent who has everything? I can’t help but think of that old line from the comedian Steven Wright, “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” Generally for people who are full-up on stuff, two things come to mind—services/experiences and consumable gifts. If they really do have everything, a gift session with a [KonMarie consultant]( might be in order. If a consumable is preferable, I’m a big fan of[Miami Fruit](, particularly their fascinatingly flavored, rainbow-colored selection of [Florida-grown bananas](. I've also never failed when giving Burlap and Barrel spices ([their Spice Club is so fun](), stuff from [Masienda](, or [bougie beans](.  Upgrade their red pepper game with the sweet heat of cobanero flakes. Photographer: Naila Ruechel for Bloomberg Businessweek I’m curious if there’s ever a time that ‘connectivity’ in a gadget has enhanced the user experience legitimately? Nope. Never. Any ideas that go beyond wine and flowers for holiday party invitations at homes? I’m impressed that you’re thinking about this far enough in advance to send in a question. I hate to admit that I’m halfway out the door when I remember not to show up empty handed. If you still want to bring a bottle, might I suggest something luxurious but non-alcoholic? I’m a big fan of [Lyre’s spirits](, especially their beautifully bittersweet [Italian Orange](, like Campari in bite but not buzz. If you’re more aesthetically minded, [pick a cool candle](, such as something suggestively sculptural from Carl Durkow. Fan the flames of dinner party excess with these candles and their holders. Photographer: Frank Frances for Bloomberg Businessweek Why do people love gear so much? Are triathlons, photography, camping just excuses to buy gear? Buying gear is a way of extending the experience. [Camping trips]( and [triathlons]( are short chunks of time in the big scheme of things. [Photography](, even shorter. Mulling over gear lets you do that stuff even when you’re not doing it. If you care about your carbon footprint, can you eat beef with a good conscience? While beef will never be as low-carbon as lentils or even chicken, some beef is definitely better than others. [Meat from former dairy cows]( has the dual benefit of being more deeply flavored, owing to its age, with only about a third of the carbon footprint of traditionally raised beef. In the US, you can order it from [Butter Meat Co](. In London, Swedish dairy cow will be featured alongside wagyu beef in the dish “Sweden vs Japan” at the newly opened[Studio Frantzen in Harrod’s](. It’s a hard job but somebody’s got to grill it. A steak I cooked testing Butter Meat’s Outlaw Box, a perfect $100 gift. Photographer: Matthew Kronsberg What is the best way to comfort a baby on a flight? I’m remembering the first flight I ever took with a baby. It was transatlantic, and he wasn’t much of a fan of the experience. The one thing that was sure to soothe my bundle of anxiety was me standing, holding him, and bouncing. I did that in the plane’s galley for at least 2,500 miles. If I had to do it again, I’d want to do it in a pair of [Hoka’s ultra-cushy Ora Recovery Shoe 2s](. I should also note that it didn’t work the whole time. But as long as you’re putting in the effort, any decent person will be understanding. Lots of people hand out pre-apology baggies to those seated around them, stocked with [earplugs]( and candy; splurge on [mini Japanese KitKats]( if you’re traveling with twins. And for the baby? Hopefully they’ll sleep for a good amount of the time. Keep on hand a cuddly [SNOObear](, which produces white noise to mask any infant-waking sounds that come your way.  And for jet-lagged adults? Don’t leave home without a Snooz. Photographer: Jamie Chung for Bloomberg Businessweek What type of gift is the easiest to get wrong? I think people walk into this propeller blade all the time: it’s not a specific type of gift though. It’s when you’re shopping for someone who is deep into a thing that you don’t know much about. I have learned the hard way to never, ever buy my wife clothes. I just don't know enough to make a good decision. Similarly, she usually steers clear of food and kitchen stuff for me, unless it’s something I’ve requested. Except, earlier this week, while I was working on the newsletter and had the page for the bananas from Miami Fruit up, she walked in, saw it, and said she was just looking at those as a gift for me. But generally, I’d say if there’s an asymmetry of expertise, beware. What is the best knife or knife set to get a home chef? See above. That said, while a [chef's knife]( is super personal and tricky to shop for, specialty pieces—an oyster knife or a bread knife—can be great and much more forgiving. Considering buying a bottle of trendy mizunara whisky? Read this first. Source: Glendalough What is the best thing you’ve bought for your kitchen? Most of my favorite stuff is decidedly unsexy: a heavy, beige, [compressed rubber cutting board](; [a baking steel](. Slabs, basically. One thing that I had that I loved (but it was borrowed for a story) is a Thermomix. [The $1,500 cooking, steaming blender]( is countless chefs’' secret weapon. It's pretty darn awesome. How do you know if you have enough stuff? My wife and I are on a tear right now, de-acquisitioning things with the Brooklyn [Buy Nothing group](. I think when you take more pleasure in getting rid of things than in getting them, you have enough stuff. Polls show that a handwritten note means more to people than other forms of communication. Source: Montblanc What are the best value for money gifts? For this, I’m going to go back to Dr. Givi. “Givers shy away from the sentimental gifts more often than recipient recipients would prefer,” he says. Frame an old photo, write a sincere letter, or create a scrapbook. “These things don't cost a ton of money,” says Givi, “but they’re really, really big home runs.” Follow Us Like getting this newsletter? [Subscribe to Bloomberg.com]( for unlimited access to trusted, data-driven journalism and subscriber-only insights. You received this message because you are subscribed to Bloomberg's Pursuits newsletter. If a friend forwarded you this message, [sign up here]( to get it in your inbox. [Unsubscribe]( [Bloomberg.com]( [Contact Us]( Bloomberg L.P. 731 Lexington Avenue, New York, NY 10022 [Ads Powered By Liveintent]( [Ad Choices](