Toxic positivity

[Bloomberg]( One upside of the past year has been the marked decrease in “fear of missing out,” or as the kids call it, FOMO. There just hasn't been much of anything to do. But as anxiety that an exciting event may be happening without you has diminished, a new anxiety has been on the rise: fear of a negative outlook, or FONO. Also known as “dismissive positivity,” FONO is expressed as an overbearing cheerfulness no matter how bad things are, a pep that denies emotional oxygen to anything but a rictus grin. Think SoulCycle instructors, bestsellers such as The Secret, and sentences that start with those negating words “At least,” which are followed by a suggestion that however bad you’re feeling, at least you’ve got plenty else that should offset and outweigh it. #Blessed. Illustration: Simone Noronha Illustration: Simone Noronha Successful people are the most likely to fall prey to this magical thinking and suffer from its consequences. Especially now, where coping mechanisms pounded into us from a young age—that we need to be positive to get through this—are compounded by the fact that life just isn’t normal. But there is a solution: recognizing your feelings good or bad. And allowing yourself and others a good moan. Once expressed, emotions are supposed to be relatively short-lived experiences. Here’s a quiz to help gauge your level of FONO. Give yourself one point for every question answered with a yes 1. Have you started a sentence with “At least …” in the last week? 2. Would your friends describe you as the motivator of the group? 3. Have you liked an uplifting meme on social media recently? (Add a point if you posted one.) 4. Do you own a well-thumbed copy of The Secret? 5. Have you ever worked in one of the following professions: life coach, spin instructor, cheerleader, or Tough Mudder franchisee? (Add a half-point for each additional gig checked.) 6. Have you considered keeping a gratitude journal? (Add another point if you already do.) 7. Have you used the phrase “Smile” or “Cheer up” or “It’s not all bad” in the last month? 8. Do you have a ringtone set to Happy by Pharrell Williams? 9. Would you prefer to be a blissful idiot rather than a tortured genius? 10. Did you read [this story]( without acknowledging any downsides? Have your score? Click through to find out just how toxic your positivity may be. [Trying to Stay Optimistic Is Doing More Harm Than Good]( No more FONO. [Habit-Forming Home Workouts for Any Kind of Person]( Fitness is hard. Getting fit from home is harder. Let us do the heavy lifting and show how to make it work for you. [Your Body’s First Line of Defense Could Use Some Love Right Now]( The best beauty products for stressed and dehydrated skin. [The ‘Peloton of Boxing’ Is a Great Way to Not Get Punched in the Face]( Liteboxer is more video game than sweet science—and that’s the point of this new home workout machine. [The Sanity List: 47 Discoveries That Have Been Getting Us Through]( Every little bit helps. Vaccine Travel Update Ready for a vacation? So are we. Vaccines are rolling out, [slowly but surely](, across the world. But medical professionals still urge caution: Vaccines are not 100% effective; it takes weeks to build up immunity (after the second shot); and little is known about the ability to transmit Covid-19, even after immunization. Herd immunity can also be sliced and diced in many ways. Photographer: CHAIDEER MAHYUDDIN/AFP Photographer: CHAIDEER MAHYUDDIN/AFP Widespread herd immunity—70% to 80% of the population being immune—is many months away, but “you can talk about herd immunity within a state, within a smaller community, or even within a family,” says Dr. Kristin Englund, infectious diseases specialist at the Cleveland Clinic. “So if everyone in a room is vaccinated but one, you should be able to offer more protection to that person.” That’s a notable consideration for family gatherings whose younger members may take longer to qualify for the vaccine than older or more at-risk members. And that may make some urban destinations like New York City more safe, counterintuitively, than [a socially distant safari in Kenya](. Travelers to the latter may have to pass through places such as Nairobi, where testing is low, and it’s hard to get an accurate picture of real-time risk. So as [the definition of “safe travel”]( may be ever-evolving, it’s best to keep your plans loose, too. One thing though is certain: wherever you go, yes, you will still need to wear a mask. Penguins in Paradise Bay, Antarctica. Photographer: Laurence Fischer/Studio Ponant [Where to Go This Year: 24 Trips With Purpose]( [How to Think About Traveling Now That Covid Vaccines Are Out]( [D.C. Hotels, Bars Confront Whether to Close During Biden Inauguration]( [Vacation-Starved Travel Buffs Are Plotting Elaborate Post-Covid Trips]( [‘Nobody Gets Out of This Stronger’ Says Langham Hotels CEO]( [Former Trump Property Aims to Be Palm Beach’s Most Expensive Ever]( Wealth Culture From the Pursuits Archives The lifestyles of the rich and famous aren’t always pretty, but they are entertaining. - [Going undercover]( at uber-spa Canyon Ranch. - [Shocking secrets]( I learned while working on private jets. - Clothing is complicated when you’re a [personal shopper at Barneys](. - [Honeymoon planning for billionaires]( can be as dramatic as the big day itself. - What happened in Vegas didn’t stay in the [Vegas high-roller suite](. And if you read just one thing... [The 11 Meals I’ll Remember the Most From 2020]( Hardworking cooks delivered incredible food in the most challenging circumstances. Follow Us [Get the newsletter](  Like getting the Pursuits newsletter? 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