I wasn’t prepared for this.

{NAME}, the other day I reached out regarding a personal dilemma. I’ll admit, I was a little nervous to ask for advice on such a ‘hot-button’ topic — but I’m sure glad I did... Because I received not hundreds, but THOUSANDS of replies filled with wonderful advice and supportive words. (I’d be lying if I said I was surprised — because it’s no secret this community is truly incredible!) See, I reached out about my daughter, Violet — who’s growing up faster than I could ever imagine. (She’s only 4, but her spunk and witty personality would seriosusly knock your socks off!) And being the protective dad I am — I want Violet to enjoy her youth for as long as possible. Of course, I’m an ‘80s boy who grew up in Wisconsin. I’ve never been — and never will be — a girl growing up in today’s world. That’s why I decided to reach out to the ever-insightful BHMD community and asked point blank: Do you think girls are pressured to grow up TOO FAST nowadays? After all, raising a daughter in Beverly Hills — with all its glitz and glam — made me wonder if kids growing up fast is ‘just the way it is’ these days. But after reading your notes, it’s clear the societal-pressure girls face is nothing new — and happens no matter where you grow up: It’s been a long time since I was a girl as I’m nearly 72, but I can tell you this, girls have always been in a hurry to grow up. It wasn’t as public back when I was a girl, because there wasn’t social media, and I didn’t have the influence of over specialized tv and movies, but even back then, being a grown up was highly more interesting than being a kid. As a girl, we played with baby dolls, emulating our mothers, then Barbies came into fashion and that opened up a more glamorous view of growing up. What I would suggest is that you make her childhood as fun and interesting as it possibly can be. Encourage her to play outdoors and enjoy nature, go camping, fishing, hiking. Get her involved in team sports. All those things make the world a bigger and more interesting place. - Amy Amy, thank you for opening up about your own childhood (and for your advice when it comes to helping Violet stay close to hers). Because as upsetting as it can be — it’s true: The toys we give our children to help them ENJOY their youth... can be the things that push them to grow up even faster. But Amy also pointed something out that I think we often forget: Society has ALWAYS put this kind of pressure on girls. That said, I think you'll agree that technology, social media, and beauty filters have made it WORSE: I have raised two daughters and am now very involved in raising my four year old granddaughter. The best piece of advice I can give is to teach your gorgeous girl that the pretty pictures she sees of girls on social media are not truth. Photoshop and filters are tools to make someone feel happy with themselves, they do not set the standard for beauty. Thank you for thinking about this. You are an enlightened dad. -Jan First off, Jan, congrats on raising 3 incredible girls — that’s no small feat! And good on you for reminding them not everything they see online is true. Photoshop and filters can be SO damaging for young girls. I see the effects almost weekly in my clinic — with girls picking their features apart as young as 14. And it’s scary to think how TV shows, movies, and social media pressure girls to grow up at lightning speeds. Because I agree. Time DOES move so quickly… And like fellow BHMD subscriber, Jane, reminded me: We don’t get time back. I definitely think there’s pressure for girls to grow up too fast. They need to enjoy their childhood, after all they only have it once, when it’s gone it’s gone… Let her know that we want back what she already has, and take time to enjoy her life. -Jane Jane, I can promise that I will cherish EVERY moment I have while Violet is still young. Because I know one day, she’ll be all grown up, look back, and WISH she could be a carefree little girl again. And sure, maybe a part of us wanting our children to enjoy their childhood is because ours went by too fast. That’s why I loved Charlene’s message — which shared a pretty nifty idea to help Violet and I relive some of our favorite memories: The pressure on girls these days is enormous. My daughter is now age 38 and we had one rule: Once a month we would go into the imaginary time machines to relive a day from [the past]. We had photos from those past days and [we’d] do whatever we did back then. We would end up laughing hilariously over past antics. So memorialize at least one day a month and [...] go into your own time machine and relive those moments. To this day she and I reminisce about our time machine adventures. Try it, you will never regret those trips down memory lane. -Charlene C’mon… tell me that isn’t such a genius idea. We’d all probably love to be able to ‘unlock’ a childhood memory on a moment's notice. (I know I sure would!) Of course, time machines don’t really exist… and I’d love nothing more than to hit the ‘pause’ button sometimes… So when I read Samantha’s message — it really hit home for me: I wish I could stop time and somehow stop the barrage of advertisements that [my daughter is] going to be bombarded with, but I can't so I will be vigilant and enjoy every second of every day we have together, starting now. -Samantha It’s true. Time is what you make of it. So sure, I could sit here and spend all my time worrying about the pressures Violet is going to face 3, 5, even 15 years from now. OR, I can take some sage advice from this community — and spend each day reminding her of all the things that make being young so special. Being carried to bed when you accidentally fall asleep on the couch… Enjoying 3-month-long summer vacations where your parents slather you in sunscreen and bug spray… Costume parades at school and making pillow forts in the living room… THESE are the golden nuggets of childhood. And I think we can ALL agree: Once we do grow up — and learn about all of life’s complexities — we’d give anything to be a kid again. Funny how it works... isn’t it, {NAME}? So I can’t thank you enough for sharing YOUR past memories of your childhood with me (it’s not always easy). After reading through all your messages and advice for when things get ‘sticky’ down the road — I feel well prepared to help Violet handle anything… SO THANK YOU! I promise, I’ll get the newsletter back to its ‘regular programming’ next week. (In fact, I just received the green light to share something BIG with you — stay tuned!) I’ll talk to you then — and as always: Thank you for making the BHMD community a truly special place. Your Beverly Hills MD, Dr. John Layke P.S. There was one more message I wanted to share with you before I go… And it’s from an extremely brave woman named Janis: I had a daughter who was born with cystic fibrosis. She lived until she was almost 25 years old. She was beautiful inside and out. A lot of her friends told me knowing her had changed their lives. When she was little and being influenced by some of her girlfriends, I told her to not be a second best Katie or Malory, but be the best Johni [...] you can be. When Violet tells you she’s too old, she IS too old. But instead of being scared and worried about the inevitable, be happy on the inside too when you’re fortunate enough to have those special days. -Janis Janis, thank you for opening up and sharing such a vulnerable piece of your family’s story. Johni sounded like an absolute fighter — and boy, was she lucky to have a mom like YOU who pushed her to be the very best version of herself every day. So for you to give me advice on how to cherish my time with Violet is a true honor. I said it once — but I’ll say it again: This isn’t just a newsletter, it’s a FAMILY — and one I am so proud to be a part of. :)      This email was sent to {EMAIL} by jlayke@beverlyhills-md.com Beverly Hills Plastic Surgery Group 436 N. Bedford Dr. Suite 214 Beverly Hills, CA 90210  [Edit Profile]( | [Manage Subscriptions]( | [Report Spam]( | [Subscribe](  These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Â